[DocJohn]

Hi folks,

This was suggested by some members, and it's a helpful addition I think to many online communities. We all have to suffer through the loss of a loved one in our lives, whether it be through death, divorce, leaving or for some other reason. The grief that accompanies such loss is usually directly correlated with how significant that person was in our lives.

I highly recommend two books under this subject:
The Grief Recovery Handbook:
The Action Program for Moving Beyond Death Divorce, and Other Losses

John W. James
The Grief Recovery Handbook offers grievers the specific actions needed to complete the grieving process and accept loss. For those ready to regain a sense of aliveness, the principles outlined in this book make this a life-changing handbook and helpful to many.[*]

On Death and Dying
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross
In this remarkable book, Dr. Kübler-Ross first explored the now-famous five stages of death: denial and isolation, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. Through sample interviews and conversations, she gives the reader a better understanding of how imminent death affects the patient, the professionals who serve that patient, and the patient's family, bringing hope to all who are involved.[/list]May your grief be short and may you learn to move beyond the grieving and into the healing and acceptance stages of loss.

Take care,
DocJohn

[darkeyes]

Thanks

In giving advice seek to help, not please your friend
SOLON

[georgie_mom]

how can i live when my daughter is with the angels now?

[Logden]

(((Trish))) And I'd like to recommend another book...

Tear Soup

[bebop]

georgie it is difficult to say the least. I lost my granddaughter when she was 13 weeks old. she was my world and I thought I would die right with her. it takes alot of time. how long has it been hon?

[LOVELYLADY1]

Originally Posted by georgie_mom

how can i live when my daughter is with the angels now?

Georgie_mom please believe that she is with you even so you can't see her, hear her or even smell her. She is in your memory forever and in your heart. The love that people have for us stays with us and are love for them goes with them, I really believe that; it keep me going and I lost lots of love ones and I still have my days when I want to give up but their love keeps me going strong . Just always remember the good times and some of the times to because that part of life to ; the bad times. But "GOD" never gives us more then we can handle, you see i'm still here; just take one day at a time. You have a bless day and try to remember the love inside of you is the same love inside of her.

[LOVELYLADY1]

Originally Posted by georgie_mom

how can i live when my daughter is with the angels now?

MANY, MANY HEART FILLED HUGS TO YOU AND YOUR FAMILY GOD HAS A VERY PRETTY LOVING ANGEL AND YOU DO TOO. I CAN ALMOST FEEL YOUR PAIN, EVEN SO I HAD NEVER LOST A CHILD; I DON'T EVEN HAVE ANY CHILDREN. BUT I KNOW HOW IT FEELS TO LOSE LOVE ONES, I LOST ENOUGH OF THEM. IT MAKES YOU FEEL EMPTY INSIDE AND LONELY AND EVEN MAKES YOU QUESTION GOD, BUT ITS TRUE; THAT TIME WILL HEAL YOU, BUT IT WILL ALWAYS BE WITH YOU . BUT PLEASE BE STRONG AND GO ON BECAUSE YOUR FAMILY NEEDS YOU AND YOU NEED THEM; ITS HARD BUT YOU CAN DO. IF YOU WANT TO TELL ME WHAT HAPPEN TO HER YOU CAN , AND YOU HAVE A EAR FROM ME ALWAYS. YOU WILL BE IN MY PRAYERS; MAY GOD KEEP YOU STRONG.

[jacksnuz]

Originally Posted by georgie_mom

how can i live when my daughter is with the angels now?

my son died on 8.28.09. he was 23, extremely intelligent, lacked some social skills which gave him great anxiety. he graduated this past may from reed college, portlamd or and had just started the doctoral work at a of missouri the week he died. the cause of death was accidental overdose.

i tried to wake him to go to bedroom to sleep, he was on couch. i am very experienced in hospice and recognized he was in rigor when i touched his cold skin. he and i always assumed we live together as we were very good friends. the loss you described instantly came to me as i called family and 911. that thought is haunting me and i must go to extremes to stay busy with something. but i cant even keep attention and have lots of stuff in process. my john john had been basicaly shunned by all family, for arguably just cause. it was just john and me, like always.

sorry to babble...my prayers are with you. peace, chris from missouri

[lt09]

Originally Posted by georgie_mom

how can i live when my daughter is with the angels now?

I have the same question. My son died in a motorcycle accident in April 2008 at 22 - and I am barely alive.....

[mamaof667]

I don't believe in the five stages of grief, I feel angry, I want my son back and yes I am depressed or is it just a normal reaction to losing my precious boy. I am sad, I have nothing to live for, my husband and I just survive each day, there is nothing like losing a child, even if he was 27, we have lost our future and reason to live.

[hawney1111]

i know how you feel i lost my son at age 28,its so hard to go on day to day but i know its what he would have wanted,i also have 2 daughters and a granddaughter and 1 on the way these are the only things keeping me going right now,just try to find something to hold on to,that will help alot

[lostmysoulmate]

it has been a year this past june i lost my husband to cancer he was my best friend an i just feel lost without him i just feel like im going on like a robot thats been programed to do the daily things going on.
22 years of bliss an now nothing yes i have my memories but thats not hugging me loving me or comforting me im just sad all the time.

missing my soulmate

[jessesgirl]

I recently got news that my 21 yr. old sons girlfriend died on 5-29-09. She lived with us for 2 yrs, and I am in shock over this and trying to deal with it. We dont really know how she died yet, only that she was found blue, and we are not even sure of the funeral date yet. I loved her like a daughter and we were very close. She was only 21, so young and so beautiful, a gitfed girl in many, many ways. I must hang in there for the sake of my son, any suggetions will help. jessesgirl...

[joanneireson]

i am the same. I lost my soulmate in February and feel sad all the time. 10 years with him, and left with two young children. I too am sad all the time. Does the pain ever go away? I don't think so....you just learn to live with it.

[babydoll233]

I am so very sorry... I lost my dad last week and that is hard enough... I will pray for you and pray you gain the strength to go on... i cant imagine your pain, I am really sorry.

[lubica77]

Originally Posted by lostmysoulmate

it has been a year this past june i lost my husband to cancer he was my best friend an i just feel lost without him i just feel like im going on like a robot thats been programed to do the daily things going on.
22 years of bliss an now nothing yes i have my memories but thats not hugging me loving me or comforting me im just sad all the time.

missing my soulmate

I just lost my husban 3 months ago and I can't think, I have incontrollable depression, I cry and ask god what am I suppose to do just waiting for an answer or maybe if I die soon I won't have to live in this world that to me is going on as normal while I am still stuck its like a living hell.

[bkwrm945]

Originally Posted by lostmysoulmate

it has been a year this past june i lost my husband to cancer he was my best friend an i just feel lost without him i just feel like im going on like a robot thats been programed to do the daily things going on.
22 years of bliss an now nothing yes i have my memories but thats not hugging me loving me or comforting me im just sad all the time.

missing my soulmate

I know what you mean. My husband has only been gone a bit over 2months. We were married 39 years. I'm not sure what I would do if I didn't have my dogs. I have to take care of them. I miss him so much, and it's not getting any better. I'm still crying often, and also sad. We knew how sick he was but it's not something you can prepare for.

[Leathethelone]

Im 56 years old,lost my aunt,my brother in law,my dad,my father in law and my mom...(on mothers day. All in 4 years. My moms been gone nearly 3 years,my dad,nearing 5. I still cant even text about them without my heart breaking,and tears puring.Ive lost several animals in that same period of time. It feels like theres no coming back from all of this. Ive been diagnosed manic depressive,bi polar didorder when i was in my late 20's. I dont grieve well,and im to this very day...still not handeling this AT ALL. Thanks for reading.

[different]

Originally Posted by mamaof667

I don't believe in the five stages of grief, I feel angry, I want my son back and yes I am depressed or is it just a normal reaction to losing my precious boy. I am sad, I have nothing to live for, my husband and I just survive each day, there is nothing like losing a child, even if he was 27, we have lost our future and reason to live.

I lost my 26-year-old son 8 years ago. Everyday I still think of him. It is extremely hard to lose a child, no matter what age. Twenty-seven is very young. I recently went to a family wedding. In honor of family members who had passed, their names were mentioned before the ceremony. I thought mentioning the names was an extremely thoughtful gesture, but at the same time, it took the focus away from the happiness I was feeling for my nephew and his bride. My eyes swelled up with tears. I began to think that this could be my son's wedding day, but I will never see that happen. I had to stop myself from the thoughts, because I really did want to share in the celebration of my nephew's wedding. Now, if this was three years ago, I probably would have had to leave. You are angry, and you have a right to be, your child is gone. All the hopes and dreams you had for your son are gone. The pain lessens over time (acceptance), but it never goes away. Others may feel differently, but I miss him every day. My only problem is that it took me this long to get where I am at today.

[peej]

I read a few books on loss and grieving, including those the Dr. quoted. Unfortunately I can no longer read more than a paragraph in a book. I had some brain damage from a bad accident in 2002. There aren't any talking books in my city.