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jekka
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Unhappy Nov 15, 2018 at 08:50 PM
  #1
As the title says my grandmother has been diagnosed with terminal cancer. My Dad found out yesterday afternoon and my parents told my siblings and I last night. She has days, maybe weeks left. I don't know if this is the right forum to post this in as this is my first post on this website. My Dad is with her now and my Mum is driving me and my siblings up to see her in the next couple of days. I am so sad and worried. I don't know what to do or to say when I see her. I am worried about my Grandfather because his health isn't great either. I am feeling pretty low and I don't want to go down hill and land myself back in psych care and all that. I just don't know what to do and I just feel like crying all the time. I would give anything for her to be okay but I know that is not going to happen. What do I do?
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Default Nov 15, 2018 at 09:08 PM
  #2
Hi Jekka. Welcome to Psych Central. I am sorry for the sad news about your grandmother.

If you can it is good to talk to your grandmother and tell her about all the wonderful times you have shared while she is living. If that is not possible, even writing those wonderful memories for which you are grateful can start the healing process. Grieving is different for everyone so accepting yourself and your grief is an important part of the healing process.

These articles or support sites may be of interest
Grief and Loss Resources

| Psych Central

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Default Nov 15, 2018 at 09:46 PM
  #3
Hi, jekka, and welcome to Psych Central! I'm sorry to hear about your grandmother and agree with CANDC. Try to spend quality time with her while you can. She will appreciate it, and you will be glad you did later.
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Smile Nov 16, 2018 at 04:06 PM
  #4
Welcome to PsychCentral, jekka. My condolences on the impending loss of your grandmother. Your post took me back many years ago to the loss of my grandmother. One additional forum, here on PC, that may be of interest to you would be the coping with emotions forum. Here's a link:

https://forums.psychcentral.com/coping-with-emotions/

And then here are links to 3 articles, from PsychCentral's archives, that hopefully may be of some help as you struggle to come to grips with this distressing news:

Preparing for Grief

On Grief, Loss and Coping

11 Kinds of Therapy to Help You Grieve a Loss

My best wishes to you...
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Default Nov 19, 2018 at 05:50 PM
  #5
Hi jekka,

Welcome to PC. So sorry about your grandmother. I think talk to her like you always have. She's the same woman that you've always known and loved. Sit with her, tell her about your day, hold her hand. Bring up memorable moments. Let her know how much you love her. Honor her with strength.
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Default Nov 20, 2018 at 03:35 PM
  #6
Hi, Jekka, Oh, honey! I am so sorry to hear this. When you talk about your psych care, what do you mean? Sweetpea, if you would rather not answer that question, I will respect your choice, always.

I wish I could help you out somehow. You have been given solid advice in the responses before mine.

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Default Nov 20, 2018 at 10:02 PM
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Psych care would be either a respite or hospital admission. Thank you to everyone who replied. I have seen her and it was hard, but I'm glad I did. She seemed happiest when the family were just chatting about life in general. I think it's going to be a case of taking each day as it comes.
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Default Nov 23, 2018 at 04:57 PM
  #8
Quote:
Originally Posted by jekka View Post
Psych care would be either a respite or hospital admission. Thank you to everyone who replied. I have seen her and it was hard, but I'm glad I did. She seemed happiest when the family were just chatting about life in general. I think it's going to be a case of taking each day as it comes.
Ok, thank you. How are you doing?

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Default Nov 26, 2018 at 02:04 PM
  #9
Quote:
Originally Posted by jekka View Post
Psych care would be either a respite or hospital admission. Thank you to everyone who replied. I have seen her and it was hard, but I'm glad I did. She seemed happiest when the family were just chatting about life in general. I think it's going to be a case of taking each day as it comes.
Yes when my dad was terminal I went there and talked to him even though he could rarely respond. I told him of the fun times I had with him and how much he had helped me grow up. That seems to have helped him know how much he was loved and appreciated.

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Default Nov 27, 2018 at 09:20 PM
  #10
Thanks again everyone. I am keeping it together alright. I saw my Grandmother for what will be the last time on sunday. It looks like it is a case of sooner rather than later. She is very tired and is fading.
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Default Dec 13, 2018 at 07:59 PM
  #11
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Default Dec 19, 2018 at 03:03 AM
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Originally Posted by jekka View Post
Thanks again everyone. I am keeping it together alright. I saw my Grandmother for what will be the last time on sunday. It looks like it is a case of sooner rather than later. She is very tired and is fading.
Your visit surely meant a lot to her! Thank God your Grandmother was part of your life!

Many hugs to you! Grief is not easy but time helps.
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Default Dec 24, 2018 at 10:17 PM
  #13
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Originally Posted by jekka View Post
As the title says my grandmother has been diagnosed with terminal cancer. My Dad found out yesterday afternoon and my parents told my siblings and I last night. She has days, maybe weeks left. I don't know if this is the right forum to post this in as this is my first post on this website. My Dad is with her now and my Mum is driving me and my siblings up to see her in the next couple of days. I am so sad and worried. I don't know what to do or to say when I see her. I am worried about my Grandfather because his health isn't great either. I am feeling pretty low and I don't want to go down hill and land myself back in psych care and all that. I just don't know what to do and I just feel like crying all the time. I would give anything for her to be okay but I know that is not going to happen. What do I do?
I'm sorry! My dad was terminal ill with cancer he didn't have time to get his affairs in check. I understand how you feel.
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