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Old 11-15-2018, 07:50 PM   #1
jekka
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Unhappy Grandmother has terminal cancer

As the title says my grandmother has been diagnosed with terminal cancer. My Dad found out yesterday afternoon and my parents told my siblings and I last night. She has days, maybe weeks left. I don't know if this is the right forum to post this in as this is my first post on this website. My Dad is with her now and my Mum is driving me and my siblings up to see her in the next couple of days. I am so sad and worried. I don't know what to do or to say when I see her. I am worried about my Grandfather because his health isn't great either. I am feeling pretty low and I don't want to go down hill and land myself back in psych care and all that. I just don't know what to do and I just feel like crying all the time. I would give anything for her to be okay but I know that is not going to happen. What do I do?
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Old 11-15-2018, 08:08 PM   #2
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Default Re: Grandmother has terminal cancer

Hi Jekka. Welcome to Psych Central. I am sorry for the sad news about your grandmother.

If you can it is good to talk to your grandmother and tell her about all the wonderful times you have shared while she is living. If that is not possible, even writing those wonderful memories for which you are grateful can start the healing process. Grieving is different for everyone so accepting yourself and your grief is an important part of the healing process.

These articles or support sites may be of interest
Grief and Loss Resources

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Old 11-15-2018, 08:46 PM   #3
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Default Re: Grandmother has terminal cancer

Hi, jekka, and welcome to Psych Central! I'm sorry to hear about your grandmother and agree with CANDC. Try to spend quality time with her while you can. She will appreciate it, and you will be glad you did later.
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Old 11-16-2018, 03:06 PM   #4
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Welcome to PsychCentral, jekka. My condolences on the impending loss of your grandmother. Your post took me back many years ago to the loss of my grandmother. One additional forum, here on PC, that may be of interest to you would be the coping with emotions forum. Here's a link:

https://forums.psychcentral.com/coping-with-emotions/

And then here are links to 3 articles, from PsychCentral's archives, that hopefully may be of some help as you struggle to come to grips with this distressing news:

Preparing for Grief

On Grief, Loss and Coping

11 Kinds of Therapy to Help You Grieve a Loss

My best wishes to you...
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Old 11-19-2018, 04:50 PM   #5
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Default Re: Grandmother has terminal cancer

Hi jekka,

Welcome to PC. So sorry about your grandmother. I think talk to her like you always have. She's the same woman that you've always known and loved. Sit with her, tell her about your day, hold her hand. Bring up memorable moments. Let her know how much you love her. Honor her with strength.
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Old 11-20-2018, 02:35 PM   #6
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Default Re: Grandmother has terminal cancer

Hi, Jekka, Oh, honey! I am so sorry to hear this. When you talk about your psych care, what do you mean? Sweetpea, if you would rather not answer that question, I will respect your choice, always.

I wish I could help you out somehow. You have been given solid advice in the responses before mine.
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Old 11-20-2018, 09:02 PM   #7
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Default Re: Grandmother has terminal cancer

Psych care would be either a respite or hospital admission. Thank you to everyone who replied. I have seen her and it was hard, but I'm glad I did. She seemed happiest when the family were just chatting about life in general. I think it's going to be a case of taking each day as it comes.
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Old 11-23-2018, 03:57 PM   #8
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Default Re: Grandmother has terminal cancer

Quote:
Originally Posted by jekka View Post
Psych care would be either a respite or hospital admission. Thank you to everyone who replied. I have seen her and it was hard, but I'm glad I did. She seemed happiest when the family were just chatting about life in general. I think it's going to be a case of taking each day as it comes.
Ok, thank you. How are you doing?
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Old 11-26-2018, 01:04 PM   #9
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Default Re: Grandmother has terminal cancer

Quote:
Originally Posted by jekka View Post
Psych care would be either a respite or hospital admission. Thank you to everyone who replied. I have seen her and it was hard, but I'm glad I did. She seemed happiest when the family were just chatting about life in general. I think it's going to be a case of taking each day as it comes.
Yes when my dad was terminal I went there and talked to him even though he could rarely respond. I told him of the fun times I had with him and how much he had helped me grow up. That seems to have helped him know how much he was loved and appreciated.
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Old 11-27-2018, 08:20 PM   #10
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Default Re: Grandmother has terminal cancer

Thanks again everyone. I am keeping it together alright. I saw my Grandmother for what will be the last time on sunday. It looks like it is a case of sooner rather than later. She is very tired and is fading.
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