advertisement
Reply
Thread Tools Display Modes
kd84zips
Newly Joined
kd84zips has no updates.
 
Member Since: Jun 2019
Location: Ohio
Posts: 1
3 yr Member
Trig Jun 04, 2019 at 12:07 PM
  #1
Possible trigger:
It has now been 7 months since this has happened and it has truly taken till now to feel like there is a small light at the end of the tunnel. Such a shocking unexpected event as a murder seems to have made the normally hard grieving process even harder. To top it off my grandpa passed away just a few days ago and I honestly feel numb and cant accept the loss of him yet because I am not yet over loosing my best friend. Some days are quite hard and I feel that it just isn't possible what had happened to her is real. I can read the autopsy reports and see what the coroner has to say but it feels impossible to be true.
Possible trigger:
and I guess at times it feels like I never got to say goodbye to her because of that. Came on here to hear other peoples stories and how they have dealt with loss of someone close to them.

Last edited by atisketatasket; Jun 04, 2019 at 12:46 PM.. Reason: added triggers
kd84zips is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
Anonymous44076
 
Thanks for this!
Iloivar, Skeezyks

advertisement
Skeezyks
Disreputable Old Troll
 
Skeezyks's Avatar
Skeezyks has no updates.
 
Member Since: Oct 2015
Location: The Star of the North
Posts: 32,762 (SuperPoster!)
8 yr Member
17.4k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Smile Jun 04, 2019 at 01:55 PM
  #2
Hello d84zips: Thank you for sharing this tragic story here on PC. I see this is your first post. So welcome to Psych Central. Hopefully coming here to PC can be of some comfort & support for you.

There has been nothing in my life that would compare with what you have experienced. So there isn't anything personal I can share. Perhaps there will be other members who will have some experiences they can share. In the meantime however here are links to 4 articles, from Psych Central's archives, on the subject of complicated grief that hopefully may be of some help:

What is Complicated Grief? | Mental Health Awareness

Complicated Grief: How to Get Unstuck | Bonding Time

Change Your Thinking To Change Feelings of Hopelessness

Grief and Loss Quiz

I hope you find PC to be of benefit.

__________________
"I may be older but I am not wise / I'm still a child's grown-up disguise / and I never can tell you what you want to know / You will find out as you go." (from: "A Nightengale's Lullaby" - Julie Last)
Skeezyks is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Anonymous44076
Guest
Anonymous44076 has no updates. Edit
 
Posts: n/a
Default Jun 06, 2019 at 11:11 AM
  #3
Hello kd84zips. Thank you for sharing your truth here I am deeply sorry that your friend was murdered. Like Skeezyks, I have not experienced something like this so I cannot relate directly. The rest of us read such stories in the news but I can only imagine the horror and shock when murder actually becomes part of your own personal truth.

Universal speed to your best friend.

I think the numbness you are experiencing, though unpleasant, is natural. Your mind is overwhelmed so it is numbing out for a while to help you cope. Would you consider speaking with a grief therapist? Someone experienced in helping people heal after loss due to murder?

You said you never got to say goodbye. Perhaps it's not too late? What about having a tribute for your best friend or even writing her a goodbye letter in the privacy of your home? Light a candle in her honor and read your goodbye message aloud. You never know....perhaps that would help even a little bit? I had a colleague who ended his life. He was a wonderful man. We were shocked. One of our clients was in terrible distress when she heard the news. She kept saying "I never got to tell him how great he was!" I asked if she would like to write him a letter. So I typed while she said everything she wanted to tell him. She read the letter to herself over and over again. It comforted her and helped her to breathe quietly again. She later gave the letter to my colleague's mother who said she felt deeply proud of the love and respect shown for her son. Just a thought for you. If you write a goodbye letter to your best friend, you could even take the letter to a favorite childhood place you two loved....maybe read it to her there?

I am also very sorry that you lost your grandpa. This is a deeply painful and confusing time for you. Try to be patient and kind with yourself. Surround yourself with loving and supportive people. Breathe slowly and deeply. One moment at a time.

Universal speed to your grandpa.

You have my empathy kd84zips. I wish you solace, love, and hope.
  Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
All times are GMT -5. The time now is 02:39 AM.
Powered by vBulletin® — Copyright © 2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.



 

My Support Forums

My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.

 

Helplines and Lifelines

The material on this site is for informational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider.

Always consult your doctor or mental health professional before trying anything you read here.