With Life Comes Death (Trigger Warning) - Forums at Psych Central



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Old 06-11-2019, 05:31 PM #1
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Unhappy With Life Comes Death (Trigger Warning)

We are born, we live, and then we die. It's a simple yet complicated process that is continuously repeated throughout time. Many of us have come to know loss and grief through our lifetime and know that it is not an easy thing to experience. The death of a loved one is never something that can be prepared for; especially emotionally.
My father passed away on September 2, 2018. He had been battling cancer, non-Hodgkin's lymphoma, for years but surprisingly that wasn't what finally took him. He had developed colon cancer and it hit hard. About three months after being diagnosed, my father took his last breath at only 54 years old.


Losing a parent is not easy, especially considering how young he was. But what really hit me hard was being the one to find he had passed.
He was in home hospice care and we had a hospital bed in the living room (his bedroom was downstairs) for him to stay in. It was setup in front of our saltwater fishtanks (his passion projects). That day, we had his nurse over to give him his usual checkup. While she was with him, my stepmom was downstairs in their room and I was down the hall in my room. The nurse had gotten him to relax a bit and take a nap. She told me she needed to make a quick stop to pick up some new meds for him and would be back shortly. A little while after she left I had gotten up to go to the bathroom. After coming out of the bathroom I went into the living room to check on him. When I got to the side of his bed my heart sank... He was gone. Tears immediately stung my eyes as I sat on the edge of the bed beside him and held his hand in mine. After some time of telling him I love him and said my goodbyes, I ran downstairs and immediately hugged my stepmom in tears. She knew by my reaction that he had passed and hugged me even tighter as she began to cry. I led her hand-in-hand back upstairs. We both cried as our hearts broke.


This September will be one year since his passing, and let me tell you...this pain and sorrow I feel still deeply hurts my heart. Every day since his passing has been heavy on my heart and not a day goes by that I don't miss him...
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Old 06-11-2019, 05:36 PM #2
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Default Re: With Life Comes Death (Trigger Warning)

Your love for your father is beautiful. Im sorry for your loss.
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Old 06-11-2019, 08:54 PM #3
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Smile Re: With Life Comes Death (Trigger Warning)

My condolences on your loss. Here are links to 2 articles, from PC's archives, on the subject of coping with grief & loss plus 3 articles on the subject of complicated grief:

On Grief, Loss and Coping

Thoughts on Memories, Grief and Loss

What is Complicated Grief? | Mental Health Awareness

Complicated Grief: How to Get Unstuck | Bonding Time

Grief and Loss Quiz

My best wishes to you...
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Old 06-11-2019, 09:28 PM #4
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Default Re: With Life Comes Death (Trigger Warning)

So very sorry for your loss. Thank you for posting so beautifully about it here. 🌹
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Old 06-14-2019, 08:55 PM #5
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Default Re: With Life Comes Death (Trigger Warning)

I am sorry that you lost your Dad so young. I hope that the fish gave him a distraction at times. It never is easy.
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Old 06-17-2019, 07:12 PM #6
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Default Re: With Life Comes Death (Trigger Warning)

Unicornicopia I am sorry for the loss of your dad. That is way too young to go and they had so much more of life to share with you if they had lived longer and had their health.

Grief can take time and appears in people different ways. Hope you find the peace you need inside to continue living life the best you can.
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