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MaddyHanna
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Default Sep 08, 2019 at 08:34 PM
  #1
Hello,

I’ve lost so much of my family. Almost every death was sudden. Due to this I have PTSD and I worry constantly about my children and everyone else that I love now. My problem recently is I am realizing I haven’t done a great job dealing with my grief. I was a mess right after all of their passing but I never really dealt with any of it. I remember them but I try to push thoughts away because it’s too painful. I am wondering if anyone has gone through something similar like refusing to feel it because it hurts too much. Did you ever heal? What did you do to heal? I know it will never stop but I’d like to be able to think of them without feeling like I’m being torn apart and then self administering a Jedi mind trick on myself to shove it all away.
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-C
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Default Sep 09, 2019 at 12:20 AM
  #2
I had to let it tear me apart and just sit with the pain for awhile and bawl my eyes out. I also went to a grief support group to see how other's handled their grief. Some of the deaths took me years to get over but with time the pain lessened and I could recall our good times without it making me cry.

Good luck and welcome to Psych Central.

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Default Sep 12, 2019 at 11:17 AM
  #3
Welcome to Psych Central! I'm so sorry for your losses. I was going to recommend grief counseling as well. They also have groups.
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MaddyHanna
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Default Sep 13, 2019 at 09:26 PM
  #4
Thank you. I might have to look into that. I’m just very uncomfortable sharing my pain with other people. I hate when other people get sad and inevitably that happens if I tell anyone what’s happened. And I don’t like when people feel sorry for me, it’s hard to address. I guess it really is the only way though. Thank you for your advice.
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Default Sep 17, 2019 at 07:21 PM
  #5
i am so sorry for your losses. it must have been so hard especially as they were unexpected. i too had ptsd from unexpected losses (of my pets). i know it is hard to face the pain but if you don't process it it will just fester and could affect your physical health too. i tried journaling, in-person and online grief support groups, but for me, i needed to say things out loud and privately so i preferred one-on-one sessions. i even had counseling by phone. you could even try just saying things out loud to yourself.

grief can also be entangled with personal issues one had with the lost loved one so there is often a lot to process. it took me many years and a lot of self-reflection and hard work to finally feel better so my thoughts are with you. wishing you well on your journey.
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Smile Sep 18, 2019 at 02:03 PM
  #6
Welcome to Psych Central, MaddyHanna. Here's a link to a listing of articles on the subject of grief & loss from Psych Central's archives:

Coping with Grief | Psych Central

I hope you find PC to be of benefit.

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