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ARC2003
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Member Since: Aug 2020
Location: Porterville
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Default Aug 04, 2020 at 01:28 AM
  #1
I lost my fiancé to suicide august 7 2003 while I was pregnant with our son. With his anniversary of passing approaching I can’t stop my brain from replaying it all over again. The image of finding him and trying so desperately to make him breathe again never goes away. It’s going on 17 years .. and this year it’s hitting me hard.. I can’t help but wish I could go be with him. Been feeling empty and alone, even though I’m not, I never gave myself time to cope with losing him.. once my son was born I just drank until I couldn’t feel anymore. Last night for the first time in 14 years
Possible trigger:
to relieve some of the pain.. I just don’t know what to do anymore

Last edited by bluekoi; Aug 04, 2020 at 10:37 AM.. Reason: Add trigger icon. Apply trigger code. Move post to own thread.
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Smile Aug 04, 2020 at 02:07 PM
  #2
Hello ARC: I see this is your first post here on PC. Welcome to Psych Central. I'm sorry you are having such a difficult time. Hopefully coming here to PC can be of some comfort & support for you.

One additional forum, here on PC, that may be of interest to you would be the Coping with Emotions forum. Here's a link:

https://psychcentralforums.com/coping-with-emotions/

And then here are links to 7 articles, from Psych Central's archives, that (hopefully) may be of some help:

Complicated Grief: How to Get Unstuck

Grief and Loss Quiz

How to Sit with Painful Emotions

Several Ways to Sit with Your Feelings

https://blogs.psychcentral.com/weigh...-with-sadness/

https://psychcentral.com/blog/unders...al-flashbacks/

https://blogs.psychcentral.com/imper...tional-wounds/

I hope you find PC to be of benefit.

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"I may be older but I am not wise / I'm still a child's grown-up disguise / and I never can tell you what you want to know / You will find out as you go." (from: "A Nightengale's Lullaby" - Julie Last)
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Default Aug 05, 2020 at 11:23 AM
  #3
Hi, ARC, and welcome to Psych Central! What a terrible thing to have to deal with! I'm sorry. I suggest you see a therapist as well as talking to us. It sounds like your grief is still active and even getting worse. Okay?
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