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Default Oct 01, 2020 at 11:02 AM
  #1
I am coming up on the anniversary of losing dad 4 years ago. I guess the healing is happening because it is getting a little cloudy since it happened so long ago and I have had a lot happen in my life. It helps that I can talk to mom about things dad used to say and we laugh.

For example, dad would watch television and we would come into the room and the tv was on and he had his eyes closed. Suddenly they would pop open. "How was the nap" we would say.

"I was not asleep. I was just resting my eyes." he responded with a slight smile.

He was the one that would help us smile when things were not going well. Miss him.

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Heart Oct 01, 2020 at 12:31 PM
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Anniversary of losing dad
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Default Oct 05, 2020 at 12:17 PM
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Anniversary of losing dad
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Default Oct 23, 2020 at 10:19 AM
  #4
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Originally Posted by CANDC View Post
I am coming up on the anniversary of losing dad 4 years ago. I guess the healing is happening because it is getting a little cloudy since it happened so long ago and I have had a lot happen in my life. It helps that I can talk to mom about things dad used to say and we laugh.

For example, dad would watch television and we would come into the room and the tv was on and he had his eyes closed. Suddenly they would pop open. "How was the nap" we would say.

"I was not asleep. I was just resting my eyes." he responded with a slight smile.

He was the one that would help us smile when things were not going well. Miss him.
I hope the anniversary went smoothly. My dad died more than 20 years ago, and I still miss him. I have many happy memories of him, and I'm glad you have happy memories of your dad also.
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Default Nov 05, 2020 at 07:04 PM
  #5
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Originally Posted by CANDC View Post
I am coming up on the anniversary of losing dad 4 years ago. I guess the healing is happening because it is getting a little cloudy since it happened so long ago and I have had a lot happen in my life. It helps that I can talk to mom about things dad used to say and we laugh.

For example, dad would watch television and we would come into the room and the tv was on and he had his eyes closed. Suddenly they would pop open. "How was the nap" we would say.

"I was not asleep. I was just resting my eyes." he responded with a slight smile.

He was the one that would help us smile when things were not going well. Miss him.
I'm sorry for your loss.
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Default Nov 05, 2020 at 08:46 PM
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Thanks Buffy. It was not as intense as the past. I guess I have too many other challenges going on now. But I also met a lot of my feelings in the last 4 years.

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Default Nov 05, 2020 at 10:38 PM
  #7
CANDC, Sorry for the loss of your dad. I read once, and beleive it, that significant losses can take 3 to 5 years before intense pain begins to subside. Sounds like the healing is happening. I can only imagine that warmth but never knew it. I was relieved when my father died and terrified every day of my life when he was alive. One thing I vowed was my kids would never fear their dad and the don't. He is their moon, stars and sun and it is a gift to witness. Glad you have good, warm memories.
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Default Nov 07, 2020 at 07:57 PM
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CANDC, I'm sorry for your loss. My dad died many years ago and I still miss him. But I think he's better off where he is. It does get easier over the years.
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Default Nov 08, 2020 at 07:58 PM
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My relationship with my dad was trying. I felt like he felt superior to me in some ways or his ways were better than my ways. He was in pain when he died so it was a release for him. I guess I am discovering that there is life after major life challenges. That is an insight that brings me some comfort.

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Default Nov 11, 2020 at 06:24 PM
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Good insight and helpful thinking, CANC.
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Default Nov 12, 2020 at 06:25 PM
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Good insight and helpful thinking, CANC.
Thanks for your kind words

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