 |
| FAQ/Help |
| Calendar |
| Search |
|
Newly Joined
Member Since Feb 2015
Location: jersey shore
Posts: 1
9 |
Feb 03, 2015 at 11:28 AM
#1
My husband has adopted my two children. We want to change their names but my 7 year old daughter is completly against it. They do not have any relationships to anyone in their fathers family so there is no connection to that name for her. Do I go ahead and change it and hope she eventually excepts it, do I not change it but change my sons or do I leave both of their names as is. My son wants my husbands name very much.
|
|
 Reply With Quote
|
|
Guest
Posts: n/a
|
Feb 03, 2015 at 06:09 PM
#2
Well, I'm certainly no expert with regard to this, Mommyofjom. But my thinking would be that the kids should be able to choose for themselves what last name they want to have. It's simply important for them to understand, to the extent that they can, they can't go back-&-forth. They can make one change. And, perhaps, they can even change back one time, if they decide they've made a mistake. But they can't just be flip-flopping back-&-forth since changing one's name is a legal proceeding & presumably there is some expense involved.
Perhaps there will be some other members, here on PC, who will be able to speak with more authority on this subject. Good luck! 
|
|
Reply With Quote
|
|
Grand Poohbah
Member Since Sep 2013
Location: Edmonton, Alberta, Canada
Posts: 1,625
10 829 hugs
given 
|
Feb 03, 2015 at 09:47 PM
#3
would your daughter consider hyphenating the two last names?
__________________ Mags Depression diagnosed March 1996 PTSD diagnosed January 2000 BPD diagnosed September 2013 |
|
|
Reply With Quote
|
|
Member
Member Since Dec 2014
Location: New England
Posts: 127
9 166 hugs
given |
Feb 03, 2015 at 11:10 PM
#4
I know it might be a bit more of a headache for you but maybe you could change just your son's name for now and wait on your daughter? Or even change them both later.
Has she explained why she's so adamant about keeping her last name? I had my first name changed to its English equivalent when I came to the United States (I was 6, so close to your daughter in age) and I felt like this person with the weird foreign name was almost like some other entity and I didn't like the sound of the new name. Of course my parents didn't ask they just did and then they told me about it after. I have no idea if that's what's going on with the last name but maybe it's something similar. Maybe your daughter isn't thinking of her last name as something that ties her to members of her father's family maybe she thinks of it as part of her identity? Perhaps you can gently tell her you're a family and you'll all have the same last name but give her some time to process. I'm assuming there's no rush. |
|
|
Reply With Quote
|
| Reply |
This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
|
My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.
Linear Mode
