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Heather11
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Default Dec 06, 2014 at 06:20 PM
  #1
I have found that my teenage son went into my bedroom and took his video game system from where it's been hidden. It was taken away bc he wasn't doing homework and was behaving aggressively to me when he did have the privilege of playing. I know he''s been in my room before and in my night table, taken money, looked for whatever was taken away-phone, kindle, etc.. He's previously been in my closet looking for another game that I took away. Of course I've told him my room is off limits.
I'm questioning what is the appropriate consequence? He has Nothing to take away anymore. Has already lost privileges, electronics. He's very defiant altogether and difficult to manage.
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Default Dec 06, 2014 at 07:55 PM
  #2
Hi Heather, I am sorry you are feeling so frustrated.

I am not sure how to discipline your son, but one thing I would do (only if you own the house) is put a padlock on your door and keep the key around your neck. Maybe that is not easy and may not be appropriate, but I would put an end to him invading your space if possible.

I really feel you need a professional to help with this situation. Is there a therapist you could go to together?

What about having a meeting and finding out what he wants and what you want and then trying to find common ground. Prison does not reform a prisoner. Finding the prisoner likes training dogs or growing things gives a creative outlet to what can be very destructive if misdirected.

Maybe the analogy is too strong but the feeling is that you are punishing him not reforming him. Maybe a new strategy is needed.

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Default Dec 06, 2014 at 08:10 PM
  #3
Hi again Heather! You haven't been around for a bit, so I assume that things were going better and then, for some reason, took another wrong turn? You are almost at the end of the road with him, he will become 18 and then punishment will no longer be an option.
You want to have a life long relationship with him, right? You need to start thinking in those terms....he is almost an adult, what you want now is love, acceptance, respect and acknowledgement of the sacrifices you have made as his mother. He may never fully understand that until he is a parent himself, but try more love and less "control". It may just work better for you. Good luck and keep us posted.
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Default Apr 09, 2015 at 04:05 AM
  #4
Like Heather, I know what I SHOULD do, but I have a difficult time FOLLOWING THROUGH with what I say. Now, they just laugh at me and say "yeah, whatever."
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