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Default Feb 23, 2020 at 03:10 AM
  #1
Just curious if anyone else who has had the pleasure would like to share anything at all about their experience. I know it may be that noone will want to share and that's fine, but I thought I would open this up and see.

As I have been more than happy to share before, I was in our our largest state hospital for 4 1/2 years. The reason for the admission was an Adderall relapse (I actually had a longstanding prescription for it, but took it improperly for about four days). A mini-relapse, basically. Very long story. My state has a very strange system for supervising people who have pled insanity, as I had for a car crash I caused during a psychotic episode in 2007. Someone was injured in that crash and despite the fact that everyone agreed I was completely out of my mind psychotic, the DA prosecuted the living sh** out of me. Trying to make a big splash. I was forced to plead insanity and enter into this crazy supervisory program. I had no other choice, other than the penitentiary. That's how Oregon does it.

And the program owns your *****. They can do anything with you. Like send you to the state hospital for almost five years for a brief Adderall relapse. It was an incredible experience. So sad. So many people there who had no business being in any psych hospital, much less that one. Others so sick, they might never get out. There were many who had no mental illness at all who had languished for years and years, with no chance of discharge anywhere on the horizon. Clinicians slant diagnoses and testimony falsely in order to maximize length of stay. It's bad. Really bad. Totally unethical and illegal. Zero oversight. Like I said, they own you.

And yet, there were also heroes. Staff members who helped me gather information for my book (I started writing it while I was there) I would never have had access to otherwise. Warned us of misconduct they saw among higher-ups. Those people risked their jobs to try to protect us. I will never forget them.

Anyhow, it was obviously a very traumatic experience. I am doing pretty well with it now. Writing, though difficult, has helped me. I want to speak for some of the patients and staff who have no voice, no seat at the table, no one to advocate for them.

Anyway, that's the short version of my story. I survived. I am much stronger now. Not much frightens me anymore. When you've lived on the maximum-security ward of the Oregon State Hospital with extremely dangerous people for 45 days, as I did, and survived it, it can give you some confidence. Thanks for reading.

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Default Feb 23, 2020 at 03:44 AM
  #2
That is sad, I am sorry
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Default Feb 23, 2020 at 04:22 AM
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I'm very grateful it is over for you now. That seems terrible.
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Default Feb 23, 2020 at 02:53 PM
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Thanks for the support, guys--I am really grateful!!

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Default Feb 23, 2020 at 06:38 PM
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I was in 2 state hospitals in different states. I do my best to forget.

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Default Feb 23, 2020 at 08:29 PM
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I was in 2 state hospitals in different states. I do my best to forget.
I'm so sorry, Nammu. So glad that is all behind you now.

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Default Feb 24, 2020 at 03:06 AM
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All I ever heard about State Hospitals is they are absolutely horrible and scary, I have known a few people that have been in one, I would never want to go to such a horrible place, I am so glad your out of there
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Default Feb 24, 2020 at 03:34 AM
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All I ever heard about State Hospitals is they are absolutely horrible and scary, I have known a few people that have been in one, I would never want to go to such a horrible place, I am so glad your out of there
Thanks a bunch, Twilight.

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Default Feb 24, 2020 at 03:21 PM
  #9
Reagan closed the state hospitals in Cal years ago. A good thing or a bad thing? Patients had nowhere to go so they lived on the streets.
I dont know how such bad facilities or the lack of any can happen in a country that can explore Mars or send astronauts to the space station. Bp, you have seen a lot of improvement lately and it will continue.We are all with you.

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Default Feb 24, 2020 at 06:39 PM
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Reagan closed the state hospitals in Cal years ago. A good thing or a bad thing? Patients had nowhere to go so they lived on the streets.
I dont know how such bad facilities or the lack of any can happen in a country that can explore Mars or send astronauts to the space station. Bp, you have seen a lot of improvement lately and it will continue.We are all with you.
Thank you for the kind words, luvyrself--so appreciative!

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Default Feb 26, 2020 at 05:58 AM
  #11
The only time I was in a state hospital was - years ago - for a 72 hour hold. I won't say it was awful...but it was darn close. I had underwear (a bra) stolen; the staff said there was nothing they could do about it. No groups, a sadistic pdoc, mean nurses. Everyone just sat in a small room watching TV during waking hours. Some would go outside to smoke. There was one tech who was kind and friendly.

That you made it through 4 1/2 years in a state hospital - well, I admire you. Thank the universe that you're out now.

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Default Feb 26, 2020 at 01:00 PM
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I admire your tenacity and the fact that you are working on that book!

How did you eventually get discharged?
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Default Feb 26, 2020 at 04:45 PM
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Thank you, Bill I really appreciate that!

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Default Feb 26, 2020 at 06:12 PM
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I am full of respect for you @bpcyclist because I could barely hack 4 days in a psych hospital that wasn't state run. In all honesty, I probably needed to be there longer but I kept saying that I wanted to get out and I put on a good show. HUGS Kit

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Default Feb 26, 2020 at 07:31 PM
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I am full of respect for you @bpcyclist because I could barely hack 4 days in a psych hospital that wasn't state run. In all honesty, I probably needed to be there longer but I kept saying that I wanted to get out and I put on a good show. HUGS Kit
You did the best you could, Kit. It's hard.

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Default Feb 27, 2020 at 12:02 AM
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I was in-patient in a psychiatric hospital for a year. It was a long term facility but not run by the state. When I had exceeded the allotted time for treatment at this hospital the plan was to transfer me to an out patient day program to see how I adjusted. I was given no readjustment help. I couldn't manage even the most basic of living skills. When I failed to readjust properly, they planned to send me to a state hospital for an unlimited amount of time. I have a very unusual and well documented trauma history as well as bipolar 1 disorder with psychosis and DID. The state hospital is where the system sends you when they have no idea anymore how to treat you. It's like being the walking dead. There is no worse feeling than knowing the entire mental health system sees you as a lost cause. I was literally rescued from permanent confinement by a young newly graduated psychiatrist who saw something in me no one ever had...he saw potential. He fought hard to keep me out of the state hospital and ultimately, he won and gave me a chance at a future. 25 years later he's still my psychiatrist. I just saw him today, in fact.
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Default Feb 27, 2020 at 01:28 PM
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The only time I was in a state hospital was - years ago - for a 72 hour hold. I won't say it was awful...but it was darn close. I had underwear (a bra) stolen; the staff said there was nothing they could do about it. No groups, a sadistic pdoc, mean nurses. Everyone just sat in a small room watching TV during waking hours. Some would go outside to smoke. There was one tech who was kind and friendly.

That you made it through 4 1/2 years in a state hospital - well, I admire you. Thank the universe that you're out now.
Thanks, Beth. I appreciate it. Glad you had a short stay.

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Default Feb 27, 2020 at 01:35 PM
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I was in-patient in a psychiatric hospital for a year. It was a long term facility but not run by the state. When I had exceeded the allotted time for treatment at this hospital the plan was to transfer me to an out patient day program to see how I adjusted. I was given no readjustment help. I couldn't manage even the most basic of living skills. When I failed to readjust properly, they planned to send me to a state hospital for an unlimited amount of time. I have a very unusual and well documented trauma history as well as bipolar 1 disorder with psychosis and DID. The state hospital is where the system sends you when they have no idea anymore how to treat you. It's like being the walking dead. There is no worse feeling than knowing the entire mental health system sees you as a lost cause. I was literally rescued from permanent confinement by a young newly graduated psychiatrist who saw something in me no one ever had...he saw potential. He fought hard to keep me out of the state hospital and ultimately, he won and gave me a chance at a future. 25 years later he's still my psychiatrist. I just saw him today, in fact.
You found your hero. So happy to hear about that.

Yes, many state hospitals, those states that still have much of one, are the end of the line. I met people who had been living at the one I was at for more than 20 years. So sad.

Ours was recently investigated by the USDOJ Civil Rigths Division. Some things are much better, like overall psychiatric care and nursing care. Also, less use of restraints. Unfortunately, once patients are fully discharged from our state supervisory system, known as the Psychiatric Supervisory Review Board, there is absolutely zero follw-up support--of any kind. Often, patients who can do well in a highly structured and supported environment really deteriorate when they have no support.

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Default Feb 27, 2020 at 01:56 PM
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You found your hero. So happy to hear about that.

Yes, many state hospitals, those states that still have much of one, are the end of the line. I met people who had been living at the one I was at for more than 20 years. So sad.

Ours was recently investigated by the USDOJ Civil Rigths Division. Some things are much better, like overall psychiatric care and nursing care. Also, less use of restraints. Unfortunately, once patients are fully discharged from our state supervisory system, known as the Psychiatric Supervisory Review Board, there is absolutely zero follw-up support--of any kind. Often, patients who can do well in a highly structured and supported environment really deteriorate when they have no support.
I wrote a book about his and my journey as psychiatrist and patient. It was published by Trigger Press and released in 2018. I have a new book coming out in Sept. I'm so glad to hear you write also!
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Default Feb 29, 2020 at 04:51 PM
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I wrote a book about his and my journey as psychiatrist and patient. It was published by Trigger Press and released in 2018. I have a new book coming out in Sept. I'm so glad to hear you write also!
Wow! What a coincidence! Good for you! And best of luck on the new book!

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