Transition - Page 2 - Forums at Psych Central



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Old 06-05-2018, 11:33 PM #11
ArchieAus ArchieAus is offline
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Default Re: Transition

Well , things are going o.k. for me ..I hope they are for you . I find I still have my up moments/days and my less moments/days . But on the whole I don't have that wild swing of emotion that I did and I found so destructive , am much happier and more positive and the Plan is progressing as per the map .
As I said before , I'm trying to make 2018 a year of self improvement . I guess 6 months in and the euphoria of that has dulled a little . Don't get me wrong the benefits are stunning , but like anything , you tend to get used to something and then it sorta just feels same-same . So I can see that the second half of 2018 will be one where I need to stay focused on those goals until I entrench my new life choices into my sub conscious .
I need to train myself up on something different also though . I have been studying myself regarding ... not sure how to describe it ? ... enjoying moments and success's . Actually taking time to just enjoy things .
I'm sure I wasn't born like this , but maybe my working life has trained me towards being like this , but everything is a task to be completed in the shortest time possible and then to move on to the next task . I've noticed that with goals . I will achieve a mini goal and I don't even stop to congratulate myself . I just go " o.k. done , whats next " So I started evaluating this and I see it in just about everything I do . Coffee and cake with the wife . I am cutting the cake , she the coffee . I cut cake then find myself analyzing her coffee making . Hmm , would be faster if you got the milk now as your waiting , you don't need to pause when you are talking there , you could still be loading the machine ....it's a silly example , but it's what I have noticed everywhere . I don't want to find myself one day walking through an amazing forest following a dream trek ...and just be staring at the map thinking " if I cut through that corner I will get to the destination faster ". Maybe I need to try meditating or something ?
This is not a problem for the moment , but I'll need to try to re train my brain down a bit if I hope to enjoy the experience of things just for the experience alone , and not just see them as a task that needs to be completed in the shortest and most efficient way . Brains are certainly complex . You wonder at times if they are on our side or not ? The journey of reverse puberty continues .
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Old 07-31-2018, 04:34 AM #12
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May you have the bladders of 1000 camels and I'm in Sydney.

PM: me for coordinates.
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Old 07-31-2018, 06:05 AM #13
ArchieAus ArchieAus is offline
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Thanks 2ISAB
I live in a town that's Main Street was built wide to accomodate a camel train to be swung around . The Afghans ran them this way with supplies . They were men from Pakistan , North Africa etc , but were all termed as Afghans . That happened between about 1860 and 1920 . But this town only started in 1894 . I went to Sydney once for a day . It was fine . I drank beer at the Rocks .
August begins tomorrow . 2018 is being conquered ...slowly . Need to stay focussed .
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Old 08-11-2018, 07:43 PM #14
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Isn't it great watching the ME generation destroying our history . Tearing down statues , removing any trace of who we were or how we developed , both good and bad . Political correctness gone insane. Disregarding anything that they haven't done or have achieved . I'm not sure if there has ever been a more selfish generation in the history of civilisation . You don't make history by denying history. They will be very annoyed to finally realise they don't get to judge their contributions , history will judge them .

Half way through August ..almost . 2018 is going to be the foundation stone of the future . Achieving stretch targets is such an uplifting thing . The war is not won , but the battle continues .
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Old 09-23-2018, 08:05 PM #15
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Last post on this thread . Pretty much has come to a natural end and hopefully a happy ending . Funny , because out of desperation I found this place , not realising that a year after I wrote that first post I would have found a way out of the cave . 2018 , whilst not yet done has been the recovery year .
So far this year I've given up smoking and effectively drinking . Lost 5 lbs ( ok I was 23 bmi anyway , but was worried I'd put weight on when giving up smoking ) . Sustained a savings rate of 55% . Increased my fitness and strength . Sleeping has improved . Don't feel angry all the time . Have regained some of my former confidence in myself . Because of all that , my work is not as destructive on my mind as it had become . Found peace . Feel at peace .
My original plans remain the same , but maybe not out of desperation anymore . But out of optimism for the future .
Possibly just writing stuff on this forum , often deranged stuff , but stuff all the same has played its part in the recovery .
So what are the goals for 2019 ? Well , continue on towards the goal , also give up the internet . I would like to go back to as much of a pre internet life as possible . We'll see , I don't see that as easy as it might sound . I have always craved knowledge . It used to be books , but the net allowed me to supercharge that knowledge gathering . There comes a time of too much mindless information though ..and as crazy as it sounds I think it contributed to my mental illness .
Over and out .
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