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Old 02-28-2018, 09:14 PM #11
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Default Re: Narcissists everywhere??!

Holy mackerel. Must Process! ! ! ! !
You're seriously over my head - but I've had a wreck of a day at work.
You're an incredibly insightful person, especially as you describe yourself as a child. You knew who you were, even when your parents didn't. You should connect with some resident expert and co-write a book.

I think you must have an unusually high iq, that would shed some light your sense of things and yourself. One of my kids is 140 iq - not so very rare, but she definitely bears some burden from it. 115 to 125 is optimal. Over 135 starts to become a problem for many, and most end up misunderstood total underachievers.

I say this because parents often act out of fear. I pressured my little one to "fit" the norm in many ways that she didn't. I had to learn to 1. understand who she is and 2. honor who she is. However it's hard. Parents want their kids to "fit in". When they're different, it takes a concerted effort to honor who they are. I'm just trying to give you additional thoughts on it, since your parent's take on things didn't help you.

I'll need awhile to take in the rest. Wishing good health.
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Old 03-01-2018, 07:07 AM #12
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Default Re: Narcissists everywhere??!

You say I'm over your head and yet here you are, you keep up with me far better than a lot of people do. I think you're a smart cookie yourself, though you may not think of yourself that way.

I know my previous post got quite long, lol my apologies. When I actually feel like opening up I tend to have a lot to say! No need to respond to literally every sentence I write, just take what's useful to you and don't overwhelm yourself! I kind of threw out a lot of things at once just because all of these concepts tend to overlap, it's kind of crazy making at times but having said that there's something to be said for the benefits of embracing some chaos in the quest of being a healthier and more whole person.

I was an extremely odd child, I'm one of those people where it was clear that my personality and so on wasn't normal from the beginning. For me it is apparent, both to myself and professionals that have given me various psychological tests and so on, nature played a bigger part for me than nurture ever did, though I think the nurture aspect did influence how some of my personality traits wound up manifesting as I aged.

I received a psychopathy diagnosis many years ago but I don't think it's entirely correct. I'm missing a few core features of that syndrome in terms of the classical presentation. I received an NPD diagnosis a bit more recently, and that disorder again doesn't quite fit. I've known slews of narcissist, both diagnosed and not diagnosed. They all have commonalities that they all share, and again I am missing some of those core commonalities.

I digress!

My IQ was professionally tested three times that I'm aware of. I did score quite high on every one of those tests, I was given a different one each time. I don't remember what my exact scores were, because I never thought highly of how IQ is measured. I know I'm intelligent, I didn't need a number from a test to tell me that, so the numbers are buried in the copies of my test results and forgotten.

That said, it is a frequent occurrence for people to tell me what you told me, that I went right over their heads. If I confused you or overwhelmed you, know that it was not my intention to do so.

I've thought of writing a book before, it would be a fun project. I enjoy writing.

Quote:
Originally Posted by wordshaker View Post
I say this because parents often act out of fear. I pressured my little one to "fit" the norm in many ways that she didn't. I had to learn to 1. understand who she is and 2. honor who she is. However it's hard. Parents want their kids to "fit in". When they're different, it takes a concerted effort to honor who they are. I'm just trying to give you additional thoughts on it, since your parent's take on things didn't help you.
Again, astute observation on your part. People in general act out of fear and when it's a child that fear seems to intensify. I never had children myself, so I can only imagine what it must be like.

My parents weren't hugely relevant in my life for various reasons. Most of the time I was in the care of others, think of "it takes a village to raise a child" and that's essentially how my childhood was.

I hope you got some rest, take your time here, I know I've given a lot of information that is likely difficult to process all at once.

As far as work stress goes, that must be tough to deal with. One thing I have always disliked about this society is that sickness and health is dictated by your ability or inability to work. Not everyone who can't work is sick, and not everyone who can work is healthy but alas that is an entirely different topic so I'll end yet another long winded post here. Narcissists everywhere??!
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