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writbre
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Trig Aug 22, 2019 at 03:46 PM
  #1
Going to Four different GP's,
Calling a therapy place,
contacting several therapies online,

And months later I am nowhere. GP's gave me leaflets for therapists that deal with low anxiety and school stress. I am 20 years old showing signs of a psychiatric disorder with extremely complex problems on top.

I call a therapy hospital and they place me on an 8-month waiting list after I talk about sometimes feeling suicidal.

I contact several therapies with my problems to have them - not bother replying, tell me they can't help, OR direct me and fob me off as someone else's problem... The list goes on and on.
Four months later here I sit still on this god damn 8-month waiting list to see a therapist that specializes in stress from school exams, parental divorce, anxiety and depression - that sort of thing.

Psychiatric disorder Bi-Polar runs in the family, I have trauma, disabilities, suicidal thoughts sometimes, self-harming addiction, show signs of either Borderline or Bi-Polar not sure, dissociation- the list goes on. My problems are the size of a novel.

So why does my system keep fobbing me off, and referring me to doctors that don't deal with disorders and only focus on bloody anxiety? I've had depression and anxiety since I was 9 for christ sake, I don't need someone to sit there and be like "aw you feel sad sometimes, huh?"

I need a professional psychiatric doctor to assess whether or not I suffer from a genuine dangerous psychiatric disorder.

It's just funny that when I was younger and sick from my disability the system had no problem throwing me at a psychiatric doctor to assess if I was making up my illness (which they said I was until I got an actual diagnoses) but I tell them "sometimes I feel suicidal and I can't keep going on like this?" and their response is "8 months. Hang in there." I kid you not.

But also after 5 minutes of speaking to me: "YEAH, You don't have Bi-Polar" 5 minutes of speaking to an anxious girl who can barely stutter out a sentence and you've made up your minds huh?

And my sister's doctor don't get me started - there are very few people I really dislike but she's one of them. Herbal medicines and snorting at people's problems and ignoring her phone calls and not bothering to schedule appointments is NOT how you deal with a patient who is diagnosed with Bi-Polar. The best thing is if I get referred I have to see the same doctor, YEAH **** that!

Suffice to say this mental health system is definitely: "Huh, guess I'm going to give up and I'll get some help when I inevitably have a mental breakdown and try to end my life. If I fail I might actually get some help, if not then oh well!"

What kind of system has people sitting down saying to themselves - "Guess I'll wait until I eventually end my life." ????

I'd just sit down and sort it out like I have every other problem - ALONE. If I didn't worry I might have something that can ONLY be cured with MEDICATION.

Last edited by bluekoi; Aug 22, 2019 at 09:48 PM.. Reason: Add triggger icon. Administrative edit.
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Smile Aug 23, 2019 at 12:43 PM
  #2
Hello writbre: Thank you for sharing your struggle. The more I read about people's struggles with the mental health system in the U.K. the less enthusiastic I am about the prospect of universal health care here in the U.S. It just seems as though the NHS in the U.K. is broken beyond repair. Hopefully coming here to PC can be of some comfort & support for you while you wait out what's left of your 8 months on the waiting list. Here's a link to an article, from Psych Central's archives, on the subject of surviving suicidal thoughts:

How to Survive Suicidal Thoughts

I hope you find PC to be of benefit.

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Default Aug 23, 2019 at 01:29 PM
  #3
I’m very sorry.
Fwiw I also live in that area of the forest and to be honest have been hurt by the providers many times and not helped

As for the “medication” I’m allergic to all of them..

It’s “my problem and I just have to deal with it”


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Default Aug 23, 2019 at 02:16 PM
  #4
I'm SO SORRY for what you're going through, @writbre!! Yes, I've heard that the Mental Health System in the U.K. can be pretty terrible. I am DEEPLY SORRY! I wish I could do something to help you... please keep writing here if that is of some comfort to you. I hope you'll be able to find someone who will be able to help you FOR REAL... In the meantime, please keep sharing your thoughts and vetn as much as you want! I am SURE you'll LOVE this WONDERFUL Forum! Feel free to PM me ANYTIME when you're in need of Advice and Support! I'm sure PLENTY of others will gladly help you out as well! Please DO keep fighting! KEEP FIGHTING AND KEEP ROCKING AS MUCH AS YOU POSSIBLY CAN LIKE YOU'RE ALREADY WONDERFULLY DOING ALL AND ENTIRELY BY YOURSELF! Sending many safe, warm hugs to BOTH You, @writbre, Your Family, Your Friends and ALL Of Your Loved Ones!!
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Frown Aug 25, 2019 at 04:00 PM
  #5
I am sorry the mental health system is failing you. Have you tried being more direct? A lot of times people in mental health systems can't relate because they've never been there. They are used to the politics and ways of the workplace, and that's based off communication. I've got schizophrenia, among many other things, and to help my nurse practitioner sort it all out, I wrote down all my symptoms on a piece of paper. Businesses like pieces of paper, so they can put it in their records (but take a picture or get a copy for yourself). For me doing this helped my newest NP (was in relationship that dragged me all over the States) realize that, indeed, I have schizophrenia -newsflash. I also didn't trust her, so I lied telling her I didn't hallucinate, but she still knew something was going on. Anyway, so my point is you may try and clearly communicate what you are saying. They may only have 20 mins to talk to you, and even though it's a sad fact, they can't diagnose what they can't understand -that's just been my experience.

Write down in a journal all your feelings, trying to keep it as rational as possible so you don't exacerbate your problems, get too emotional, etc. Then, make a summary of these things that are your symptoms, and then go to your GP, or psychiatrist, or whoever, and maybe that will help. If not, complain to the supervisor. That might make them pay you a little bit more attention and take you more seriously. Hope this helps
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Default Aug 31, 2019 at 11:15 AM
  #6
it failed me too ! big time ! now i'm so frustrated and pissed off. these doctors just want to push pills on u. the pills were'nt the fix to the problem. now i'm a walking zombie. a walking zombie. whats the fix for that ? i ask you ? you're young. i hope for u that when you reach my age you fare better than i did. now i'm homeless and hopeless. i've been totally betrayed
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Default Aug 31, 2019 at 12:22 PM
  #7
Quote:
Originally Posted by writbre View Post
Going to Four different GP's,
Calling a therapy place,
contacting several therapies online,

And months later I am nowhere. GP's gave me leaflets for therapists that deal with low anxiety and school stress. I am 20 years old showing signs of a psychiatric disorder with extremely complex problems on top.

I call a therapy hospital and they place me on an 8-month waiting list after I talk about sometimes feeling suicidal.

I contact several therapies with my problems to have them - not bother replying, tell me they can't help, OR direct me and fob me off as someone else's problem... The list goes on and on.
Four months later here I sit still on this god damn 8-month waiting list to see a therapist that specializes in stress from school exams, parental divorce, anxiety and depression - that sort of thing.

Psychiatric disorder Bi-Polar runs in the family, I have trauma, disabilities, suicidal thoughts sometimes, self-harming addiction, show signs of either Borderline or Bi-Polar not sure, dissociation- the list goes on. My problems are the size of a novel.

So why does my system keep fobbing me off, and referring me to doctors that don't deal with disorders and only focus on bloody anxiety? I've had depression and anxiety since I was 9 for christ sake, I don't need someone to sit there and be like "aw you feel sad sometimes, huh?"

I need a professional psychiatric doctor to assess whether or not I suffer from a genuine dangerous psychiatric disorder.

It's just funny that when I was younger and sick from my disability the system had no problem throwing me at a psychiatric doctor to assess if I was making up my illness (which they said I was until I got an actual diagnoses) but I tell them "sometimes I feel suicidal and I can't keep going on like this?" and their response is "8 months. Hang in there." I kid you not.

But also after 5 minutes of speaking to me: "YEAH, You don't have Bi-Polar" 5 minutes of speaking to an anxious girl who can barely stutter out a sentence and you've made up your minds huh?

And my sister's doctor don't get me started - there are very few people I really dislike but she's one of them. Herbal medicines and snorting at people's problems and ignoring her phone calls and not bothering to schedule appointments is NOT how you deal with a patient who is diagnosed with Bi-Polar. The best thing is if I get referred I have to see the same doctor, YEAH **** that!

Suffice to say this mental health system is definitely: "Huh, guess I'm going to give up and I'll get some help when I inevitably have a mental breakdown and try to end my life. If I fail I might actually get some help, if not then oh well!"

What kind of system has people sitting down saying to themselves - "Guess I'll wait until I eventually end my life." ????

I'd just sit down and sort it out like I have every other problem - ALONE. If I didn't worry I might have something that can ONLY be cured with MEDICATION.
@writbre, I too am in the UK and being failed by the mental health system. I think the basic problem is that there is too much demand and too little resources (money/qualified people), so the sub-par system that is in place, ends up failing most rather than helping everyone.

8 months to a year+ on a NHS waiting list is nothing unusual unfortunately. What little resources there are, are stretched so thin as to be ineffective and meaningless.

The much-touted IAPT (Improving Access to Psychological Therapies)..... 3 month wait just for a telephone assessment, only to be told 'you are too high risk for our service, we can't help you sorry'.... bump back to GP. GP refers to CMHT..... 2 years it took for referral from primary care to secondary care (and that was with the support of a MH Advocacy service). It's not good. However, CMHT does vary according to where in the UK you live, to so-called postcode lottery... Have you tried referral to a Community Mental Health Team? If not, might be worth a try. Can't promise it will be quick but at least you will be on a list whilst sourcing other avenues of support.

Good luck.
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Default Sep 01, 2019 at 03:47 AM
  #8
Okay well the doctors can be really annoying sometimes,and maybe you need to treat yourself with some "goodies"(a chocolate bar,packet of crisps and a fizzy drink) spend some time in your room watching DVD's and relax for awhile.What makes you want to feel suicidal? If its people than you need time for yourself to think about who you really want to talk to and people who you don't like.Alot of the time its from many things... have you ever felt this way before? do you live alone??

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Unhappy Sep 01, 2019 at 02:30 PM
  #9
Hi there,
I'm new here, and it's worth noting that I feel the exact same way to the extent that I started this profile just so I could talk about it with someone else.

I've been through many medications, four-five therapists, four pyschiatrists, and two rounds of TMS. Also had multiple ER visits.


One of the ER visits seriously complicated my existing PTSD because a crisis counselor on the phone (who I trusted and was talking to) basically lied to me to the point where she s'chmoozed me to letting police into the situation without telling me. She told me she was sending a counselor or whatever.The police treated me like a criminal, they took me to a hospital where I was previously sexually assaulted even though I begged them to take me to another nearby hospital. They didn't care. Then he told me to stop crying cuz I was hurting his ears, and he would put me in the cage or whatever. So demeaning, and definitely changed my regular PTSD to "complex PTSD" which is a HUGE game changer in my recovery.


I once tried IOP which led to a hospitalization due to how triggering it was (people were very unskilled - it was appalling), and I still have nightmares about the hospitalization. This was an inpatient facility - the staff were incredibly demeaning, called us by numbers, mocked me when I asked if he could sharpen my pencil because I couldn't sleep and wanted to write. There's no conditioner, so if you wind up there unexpectedly like I did, then sucks to be you. The showers are dark and have mold growing on them - there are no hooks or benches to hang your clothes or towels so you're forced to put it on the dirty floor. I showered with my hospital socks on because it was so appalling These are just a few of the highlights, but I could go on and on about how horrible it was. This complicated my PTSD even more -- I now have severe sleep issues and dream about this almost every single night, over a year later.

I truly feel the system has failed me.

The past 7-8 years I've dealt with extreme fatigue and doctors never took me seriously. Finally this past year, I fall asleep at work and my boss demands answers. so finally, I get referred to a sleep study that indicates Idiopathic Hypersomnia (similar to narcolepsy) wehre I can just sleep and sleep and sleep. The only way to treat it is with meds, many of which are stimulants and controlled substances. The pharmacies and doctors often get it wrong so you'll go to the pharmacy only to find out you can't get your meds, and it's a weekend so you can't get ahold of your doctor, but if you don't have the meds for work on Monday you might get fired for falling asleep...... but no no cares. They tell you to just hang on and deal with it.

I've since lost my job and my whole life. I feel like the stress caused by these doctors, pharmacies, hospitals, and medications has made me even worse than I ever was.

To top it all off, how demeaning is it to constantly be belittled by doctors - they ignored my sleep issues for YEARS. They also don't listen to me in general when I talk... now they seem surprised that I'm getting worse. To not be listened to by all these doctors, and to have them put you in care that actually causes reduced harm... has an incredible impact on the psyche. When you're a child and you trust your parent and they betray you, it causes severe mental health problems. At this point, I feel like a rejected and abused child by the medical system who was "supposed" to be on my side -- a huge mind ****.

Hoping for a brighter day, but hopeless if that makes sense. I want to write an EBook about this and expose the truth if anyone is willing to jump in on that goal with me.
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Default Sep 20, 2019 at 06:17 AM
  #10
I'm so sorry for what you're going through. Here are some tips which can help you. According to me, Loneliness can have a big impact on your mental and emotional health, as well as your physical health. so don't be alone make some friends, make some trips with your friends etc the best ways to protect your mental health is maintaining a good and healthy relationship, challenge yourself and check-in with yourself, learn about mindfulness meditations, take enough sleep, self-care, etc .i hope that this suggestion will improve your mental health.
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Default Oct 01, 2019 at 11:39 AM
  #11
ME TOO ! if I have to keep reminding you ? I will.
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