Stuck in an Endless Loop

Does anyone feel like they're stuck in an endless loop?

It goes like this:
I am happy for a little while, and things are going good -->
I mess some things up and things start to go downhill just a little (I have ADHD and make frequent mistakes in things I do, or have trouble starting/finishing goals) -->
I try to keep it together but I mess up more and more, and it gets worse. I start to feel sad, depressed, and hopeless, and worry about how things in the future will turn out -->
I go into another episode of depression, and I start to really hate myself and feel like everything I do just fails, my life continues to go downhill -->
I am in serious pain, maybe even suicidal, because everything is hopeless and I always mess things up no matter what I try -->
Some little stroke of luck happens and one or two things go my way, so I try a little harder, and try to remind myself of that one thing that went my way -->
Things start to brighten up a little, but I'm still anxious about it -->
I am happy for a little while, and things are going good -->

And on and on. If things are going good for me, I always end up messing it up and I fail without even knowing where I went wrong. The good in my life never lasts very long, and I always end up in a dark place. I've had at least one episode of depression a year since 2015 and I don't know if I can on much longer like this. I feel like I just disappoint everyone in my life. I feel stupid, worthless, and hopeless. I will never do anyhting with my life and I feel like my own parents hate me (which is crazy, because they're LITERALLY MY PARENTS, but I honestly feel this way).

I don't want to live anymore in this life if it all just ends in a bad place no matter what I try.

Does anyone else feel this way?

Does anyone else feel stuck in an endless loop with no way to get out?

Yes I feel this frequently!

Feel reasonably okay all things considered---> Get pissed off at something that probably doesn't exist or that shouldn't be a big deal---> Make a BIG angry scene---> Pout--->
Get depressed realizing how badly I overreacted (again)---> Feel suicidal knowing nothing is ever going to change---> Gradually let it go until the next cycle when it all happens again...

Yeah I totally feel that. I feel that nothing changes with me, and that I inevitably end up annoying the people who love me, and that maybe I am just a burden on the people around me and that I shouldn't be alive.

I do get suicidal.

Hang in there ❤️

At this point, I feel like my entire life is an endless loop. My therapist says that I feel stuck right now, but that eventually I won't. I hope she's right, because this is hardly bearable.

Hugs to everyone who feels stuck. I try to remind myself in the bad times that the good times will be back.

I certainly feel in a Loo, @Bookworm257, and I sadly see I am not the only one. We have to keep trying. We're all stronger than this! I know you all are, certainly more than me, and I'm wishing the BEST of Luck and sending many Hugs and Positive Vibes to You All! Never give up Hope! Sending many safe, warm hugs to BOTH you, @Bookworm257, your Family, your Friends, your Parents and ALL of your Loved Ones! Keep fighting and keep rocking NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, OK?!

I don't think you're alone in this. Most people, I would wager, feel like their life is a loop.

Wake up, go to work, come home, relax, go to bed. Rinse and repeat.

I think what you are saying, and I could be wrong, is that your loop is filled with pain. My suggestion, and please take this with the best intentions, would be to find something you can do - either creatively or physically - that you can do to try and "shock" yourself out of your cycle. Try painting or playing music or writing.

I believe the best therapy is engaging in some sort of creative activity.

I am definitely stuck in a loop. I don't know anyone who doesn't feel that way. One of my favorite artists wrote a song about it in fact.

GOTYE EASY WAY OUT