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Rive1976
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Trig Jan 20, 2020 at 10:15 AM
  #1
I have always had this part of me. Well since about 14 that thinks horrible things are funny. I don't think these things are funny. Like horrible news stories, etc. I have also smashed a animals paw in a door even though I love animals and that is not what I wanted to do. I also have horrible inappropriate urges to touch people that I have been fighting to control since I was 8 years old. I have literally fights with my body not to act like I might hold my hand down so I dont do it. Or go to commit the action and jerk my hand back. Sometimes my whole body writhes like I am possessed fighting not to commit the action. Does anyone know what could be going on with me? Please don't move this to the dissociative Identity section or personality disorder section. I already asked there years ago. I'm looking for a subjective opinion.
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Default Jan 20, 2020 at 11:28 AM
  #2
I am afraid I have no idea what may be causing this to you, @Rive1976, but I'd certainly talk to your Doctors and Therapists as soon as I can if you haven't done it already. Did you explain ALL of this to them? Did they say anything? Please stay safe. You deserve to get better! Sending many safe, warm hugs to BOTH you, @Rive1976, your Family, your Friends and ALL of your Loved Ones! Keep fighting and keep rocking NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, OK?!
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Default Jan 20, 2020 at 03:16 PM
  #3
Hi Rive1976,

No, I don't understand the workings of the brain either really, but I can relate a little bit in terms of my moods sometimes going completely against my will. Also, if I become very angry within myself, I get a strong desire to smash something, to destroy something, and that takes a real effort of will to prevent myself from acting out.

If it's any consolation, I believe a lot of people are fighting negative impulses in one way or another too, daily. But, no - no major insights here, just some self awarenesses, also.

It's a funny old thing, the mind, and I hope you gain some valuable insights eventually, @Rive1976.
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Default Jan 20, 2020 at 03:26 PM
  #4
Wish I had some great understanding and advice, but unfortunately I don't. Discussing these issues with a therapist is the only advice I can think of. A good therapist might help you understand why these things are happening to you and have practical advice for you. Wishing you the best! - Yaowen
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Default Jan 20, 2020 at 05:16 PM
  #5
I'm a f*in psychiatric an anomaly.
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Default Jan 20, 2020 at 10:36 PM
  #6
I've talked with them about it. My therapist and Psychologist think I have a dissociative disorder with some repressed memories. I just wanted other opinions.
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