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Grand Poohbah
Member Since Sep 2013
Location: N/A
Posts: 1,776
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#21
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Hi Serpentine Leaf, I wanted to thank you for posting this! I am blown away by your insight about the world, and your ability to articulate it so well. I enjoyed reading your post. It is eye candy for the empathic types who try so hard to understand the problems in the world and fix them. I look forward to your future posts. I hope you have a good day. Thanks, HD7970ghz __________________ "stand for those who are forgotten - sacrifice for those who forget" "roller coasters not only go up and down - they also go in circles" "the point of therapy - is to get out of therapy" "don't put all your eggs - in one basket" "promote pleasure - prevent pain" "with change - comes loss" |
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bpcyclist, Serpentine Leaf
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Serpentine Leaf
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Member Since May 2013
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#22
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I'm not an American, but I feel a lot of what you are saying. Something went to h3ll with our ability to form communities in the real world. I don't know how or why. I know that I have tried, and it sounds like you have tried different routes too. Like you said, people are wrapped up in their own little social groups. Years ago my wife and I moved to a new city. We made the BEST connections there. In some ways I'm sorry we left. One couple we met were at the root of it all. They drew no boundaries or distinctions... Friends from different social networks, and family, were all invited together to their home. We met their friends from his work, their friends from her work, their friends from his childhood, from her childhood, their friends from their church, his family, her family.... That's how they rolled. It was really cool, and a great example to follow. And.... Anyone who never did shift work doesn't "get" how isolating it is. It sucks. The best thing a shift work job did for me was fund an education that led me out of shift work. I feel you, and everyone else that this thread resonated with. RDM |
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bpcyclist, Serpentine Leaf
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Serpentine Leaf
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Member Since Dec 2019
Location: Mid Atlantic
Posts: 166
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#23
I'd like to thank everyone for their kind replies, too many to count by name. This post really seemed to resonate with a lot of people, and not just Americans. Here in the States we obviously have our particular quirks, to put it mildly. But we don't hold the monopoly by a long shot, an din some places it's so much worse with mass violence on the streets.
People who think and feel deeply are having the roughest time right now, and there are A LOT of us on here. It fills me with hope that so many of us are reaching out in whatever way we can from across the world. Humanity holds promise for a better future, which in my view is a more inclusive and just society no longer defined by material success but by community connection, solving the problems of war and poverty and addiction and all the other forms of worldsuck. We can live in a way that doesn't destroy the planet that gives us live, and destroy our minds. People may have different ideas of how to proceed (and I think that's a good thing, because no single ideology should dominate the way forward; everyone's voices and experiences deserve to be heard), but one thing is increasingly obvious: the way we are living just isn't working anymore. So many people all around the world, of different cultures and economics and governmental systems, are feeling this isolation and general sense of decay. Steadily increasing income inequality not only within nations but between them is certainly a factor, but something else is happening too that no one can seem to quite define. I can't either. People are retreating into whatever feels safest for them, whether it's a continuation of materialism and narcissism, substance use, tribalism, extremist politics, or anything else we see (Brexit, anyone?) Specifically to RDMercer: you really hit it on the head right there with what you had at your former home. Those kinds of deep personal connections are what makes life beautiful. When we are cut off from them, or can never form them in the first place, our psyches decay. You and your wife had something incredible there and I'm sorry you had to leave it behind. Working odd shifts is very isolating, and like many other things, it might be something you have to personally experience to understand. I did put in an application to return to school and finally finish my degree. I experienced a serious of personal, health, and financial problems that kept me out, but now I'm on my feet again and can move forward. I'm happy that you succeeded through the same thing. And to everybody on here: thank you so much for making me feel so understood and less alone. You're helping to fuel my hope that humanity can work through all of this mess if we roll up our sleeves and stand side by side, regardless of our differences, which should be celebrated and not condemned. |
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*Beth*
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*Beth*
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catches the flowers
Member Since Jul 2019
Location: Downtown Vibes, California
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#24
Thank you,Serpentine Leaf, for starting such an exceptional thread.
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Serpentine Leaf
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Serpentine Leaf
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Grand Magnate
Member Since May 2014
Location: Ireland
Posts: 4,390
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#25
I understand the OP very well and agree with the points made. I do however tend to form the view that all the bad stuff on TV with an added boost of negative can be draining like some vampire lurking behind us. We can opt to switch off and not listen or watch. It is not as though we stick out heads in the sand and pretend its not there we can acknowledge it but not at our own emotional expense. There is however a point that for some reason media and TV generally seem to have adopted the idea that bad stuff is selling is more ways than one. There is no great conspiracy there rather just the way things work out. Evolution is in a strange phrase and getting stranger. The positive news and good news that is also out there is not getting coverage, as a result, we often do not know it is out there. Keep in mind for every bad person there are 10 good people, we just don't see or meet them very often. But trust me, they are out there. Mean people on TV big themselves up to look bigger then they are. Bad news looks huge but is often not as bad as could have been. Things could be a lot worse is often my motto.
__________________ A daily dose of positive in a world going cuckoo Humour helps... |
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MuseumGhost, Serpentine Leaf
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MuseumGhost, Serpentine Leaf
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Member Since Dec 2019
Location: Mid Atlantic
Posts: 166
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#26
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There's undeniably a negativity bias not only in the media but in human minds. We're hardwired to be alert for threats. I'm not at all denying that there are good people and good things happening now. But the bad is very bad, and we do have to remain vigilant. Things get worse when people stop caring about making the world better. Things never get better or worse on their own; there's nothing cosmic about it. It's all based on the daily choices every person makes. If I had no reason for hope I would not be on this site, or taking action as a campaign volunteer. We all get overwhelmed at times (I was WAY overwhelmed when I started this thread) but we need to use worldsuck to drive us, not to give up. We have to see it clearly for what it is: not see it as insurmountable, but not see it as "not so bad after all." I'm certainly not ripping on anybody here. For the sake of mental health, everybody has to step away for awhile. But then we need to come back with a fresh perspective and fresh hope. |
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Member Since May 2013
Posts: 733
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#27
"Specifically to RDMercer: you really hit it on the head right there with what you had at your former home. Those kinds of deep personal connections are what makes life beautiful. When we are cut off from them, or can never form them in the first place, our psyches decay. You and your wife had something incredible there and I'm sorry you had to leave it behind. Working odd shifts is very isolating, and like many other things, it might be something you have to personally experience to understand. I did put in an application to return to school and finally finish my degree. "
I couldn't do shift work. It destroyed me. Punching a clock, and knowing that, in a factory setting, work was never "closed" and I could be called in at any time. I could go back to that industry and make more money, but I couldn't do it for long without it seriously effecting my mental health. Shift rotations kind of make you feel like a spectator on the rest of the world, which exacerbates the feeling of isolation. I'm saying, you may have more connections than you think you do, but the perceptions shift rotations cause may be bad filter or lens on the world for you. Try to get out if it is effecting you. Hopefully you can try to trade up. I voiced my own concerns about isolation a year or more ago, and another poster pointed out how just pushing trhough day after day destroys our ability to think in creative and novel ways., which effect our earning potential and ability to come up with solutions... Which keeps us locked into the same rut. RDMercer |
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Serpentine Leaf
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Serpentine Leaf
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Member Since Dec 2019
Location: Mid Atlantic
Posts: 166
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#28
Thank you, RDMercer. Mercifully my work isn't a swing shift, it's just second shift. Those swing shifts are brutal, especially if you have to be on call. The isolation and unpredictability make a personal life nearly impossible if you didn't have one established before entering.
I'm still working on connections. Most of them are purpose-driven right now with my involvement in grassroots-level politics. That is filling me with hope and obviously purpose. People working together for a common cause is very powerful and uplifting, and something that in my view everyone should have the opportunity to experience. Close personal relationships remain elusive but I no longer discount the possibility that I might some day attain them. Author and You-Tuber John Green's words really stick with me in this regard: "I thought I had failed, but I just hadn't succeeded yet." You're certainly right that a situation that surrounds us can distort our perceptions. I have the tendency to fall hard in that trap. I've applied for other places multiple times, and promotions or other positions within my current workplace, without success. I put in an application to return to school and I have that to look forward to. I'm now back on the path I never should have stepped off of when I was 18. That's very insightful about how pushing through the drudgery of a day after day can destroy creativity. It's very hard to think of the future or innovation with a survival brain that's locked on getting through the moment. That would certainly lead to a positive feedback loop of remaining trapped. Right now I'm not feeling so overwhelmed as I was when I first posted this thread, but all these suggestions are valuable things to keep in mind if I slip back again. I hope other people who feel the same way can get the same benefit. Thank all of you so much. I love PC! |
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Poohbah
Member Since Aug 2015
Location: Philadelphia PA.
Posts: 1,291
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#29
Serpentineleaf. I feel pretty much the same way . The world can be so overwhelming. That's most likely why I take naps to withdraw from the current chaos and especially DT getting off ie escaping impeachment. I believe Bernie will be our hero.
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MuseumGhost
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MuseumGhost, nonightowl
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Apr 2012
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 3,257
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#30
I find I have to periodically withdraw from paying too much attention to what you refer to as worldsuck. It will swallow you up whole, if you let it.
If I take a few days away, it energizes and sustains me. I concentrate on what rings positive for me---my small world---and do the good that I can within it. The world can carry on without me for a time---this has always been the case. When I'm stronger, I can return and contribute in my own ways to the changes I see a need for. Please do take care of yourself. You matter so much! |
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Serpentine Leaf
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Serpentine Leaf
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Member
Member Since Dec 2019
Location: Mid Atlantic
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#31
We all need to step away for a bit when we get overwhelmed. We have to not only accept but celebrate our humanity. Then when we come back we're able to focus more on what unites rather than divides us, and see that so many people are working selflessly for a better future. The loudest voices aren't the most representative ones.
Self-care and self-compassion are essential! But they're things most of us struggle with. Not enough people get told that we matter, and in fact, we too often get the exact opposite message. Thank you, MuseumGhost (SO many cool screennames on here!) And I will say to everybody here on PC: you all matter and you all belong. |
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Anonymous42019, MuseumGhost, zapatoes
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MuseumGhost
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Apr 2012
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 3,257
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#32
I am dealing with a bit of this myself, right now, so I really do relate to what you're talking about.
I find as I go on in my struggle with depression that I can refine my approaches to things that previously looked like insurmountables...time and experience go a long way towards developing patience for this sort of self-care (which I think it is), and what kind of attention we pay to what troubles us. It does help a great deal to know we're not the only ones who are so profoundly affected by alla this! ((((great big hugggg)))) |
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Serpentine Leaf, zapatoes
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Serpentine Leaf
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Veteran Member
Member Since Oct 2011
Location: USA
Posts: 533
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#33
There were plenty of times when the world sucked much more than it does now.
The difference today is that we are in an information overload ! The main problem in my view is that we humans may have evolved in many ways. But , we do not seem to be evolving psychologically, in an individualistic way. Society and forward progress is out of sync with the human mind. As the great Carl G. Jung said , “ it all has to start with the individual “. __________________ Today is the first day of the rest of my life. *Disclaimer * Anything I have posted is strictly my own personal opinion or experience , and is in no way, shape, or form meant to portray a professional assesment of any kind. CB |
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zapatoes
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Magnate
Member Since Sep 2019
Location: UK
Posts: 2,406
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#34
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Hi @Serpentine Leaf I think it's good practice also to limit our watching television news, especially towards bedtime when we tend to overthink; at least I do. We avoid watching tv docudramas because their content can trigger unpleasant memories and we go to bed with images troubling our minds. And let the world get on with itself. Listening to the radio can be helpful because we are not bombarded with images. Radio can drone on in the background while we play with jigsaw puzzles or reading our current favourite book. Self-care can be demanding at times, but reading is a relaxing hobby, and the book can be put down and returned to later. When the sun is shining, then we can enjoy our creativity, be it colouring-in books shared with our children, or pootling around on a cycle or weeding in the garden. Our creativity is the most rewarding, even tending to houseplants and talking to them. And we don't need to sweat the small stuff. __________________ |
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zapatoes
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Wisest Elder Ever
Member Since Nov 2002
Location: Cave.
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#35
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