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Blush Aug 12, 2020 at 04:58 PM
  #1
Is there a mental illness that causes a person to lie about everything. Things that shouldnt even matter or seem unimportant its still lied about. I need to know what is really going on.
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Default Aug 12, 2020 at 08:08 PM
  #2
I am not a personality expert, but folks w various issues in that realm do often lie. Narcissist lie to avoid dealing w feeling inadequate. People w borderline may lie to avoid shame. Etc.

What is the context of this lying?

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Default Aug 13, 2020 at 07:51 AM
  #3
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Originally Posted by bpcyclist View Post
I am not a personality expert, but folks w various issues in that realm do often lie. Narcissist lie to avoid dealing w feeling inadequate. People w borderline may lie to avoid shame. Etc.

What is the context of this lying?
I have a friend who married a man that she says she didnt marry the man she thought she did. He lies about everything. She said even down to putting on a whole different image of himself. But she says when ever she asks him any kind of question he will just lie no matter what the question is. She has caught him so many times in just stupid lies that she says it makes her sick. Why would someone need to lie to a spouse like that. They are not children and should not have to lie about anything especially to each other. Its not like hes a kid and could be spaked or punished for giving a wrong answer to his parent right ? So i just dont get it. Hes not doing anything that he should feel like he cant just give her an honest straight forward answer. Does he want her to not trust anything he says?
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Default Aug 13, 2020 at 01:52 PM
  #4
I married a guy like that too. He also had the belief that if he didn't say anything then it wasn't a lie...like when he didn't tell me about the letter from the IRS about owing back taxes. When I did find out about it he said he couldn't figure out the problem so he just ignored it. I was always cleaning up messes he made & never told me about....but I always found out (33 years I stayed married to that before I had enough & left)

He was diagnosed with adult ADD in his late 50's (obviously had it all along) but what they never added to it because it was newer ex at the time was high functioning ASD.

He was constantly full of excuses as to why he couldn't do things that basically normal minds could figure out. We were both computer engineers & he was always giving excuses for things in his career that a wife that wasn't in the same career might buy into but I knew better & didn't let it slide. Constant conflict the whole marriage.

After I left I realized that he was incapable of taking responsibility for what he did....maybe because the way his mind worked he didn't even comprehend the problems. Not sure the lies were even actually intentional.....then I caught them & that was when lies turned into excuses & it started getting worse the older he got.

There are so many reasons people lie & make lies into excuses for things. Sometimes I think my now EX- husband really couldn't handle a wife that was just as capable (if not more) & the lies & cover-ups were because he didn't want to look like an incompetent husband.

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Default Aug 13, 2020 at 07:02 PM
  #5
There are a number of mental health conditions that pathological lying is an aspect of. Then too, some people lie just to cover a truth they don't want someone else to know.

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Default Aug 16, 2020 at 03:19 AM
  #6
Mental illness possibility aside...People lie out of fear. Fear of getting in trouble, fear of failure. Fear of not being good enough. Think about some bad lies that have been told....were they not usually based in fear? Then there are people who are just liars. Maybe they have mental illness or a PD but there are some awful people out there who are just bad.

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Default Aug 16, 2020 at 12:32 PM
  #7
It’s a common form of escape, even from themselves.
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Default Aug 18, 2020 at 03:48 AM
  #8
Apparently, according to his family, Trump lies because he derives pleasure from deceiving others.

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Default Aug 18, 2020 at 11:12 AM
  #9
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Apparently, according to his family, Trump lies because he derives pleasure from deceiving others.
& if you are unwise enough to not be able to detect what lies are then you are the one with the problem. The other side of the fence lies terribly & they have been on TV talking out of both sides of their mouths too.

Bottom line.....we as individuals need to get out heads out of the sand & call out all lies & STOP letting people get away with it. It may not stop them from lying but it puts them on notice that we are wise to it & we as an individual won't believe the lies. What others do is there own personal responsibility of how they choose to handle lies.

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Default Aug 18, 2020 at 11:40 AM
  #10
I totally agree eskie and I distance from taking in too much of it because you are right in that both sides lie and try to manipulate and gaslight. This is also why a high percentage of Americans do not trust the media too. Also, a high percentage of Americans keep their opinions private too. There is entirely too much anger out there and it's just not worth it to talk about it IMHO.
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Default Aug 18, 2020 at 08:47 PM
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I totally agree eskie and I distance from taking in too much of it because you are right in that both sides lie and try to manipulate and gaslight. This is also why a high percentage of Americans do not trust the media too. Also, a high percentage of Americans keep their opinions private too. There is entirely too much anger out there and it's just not worth it to talk about it IMHO.
For me it is worth it to talk about it (not here at PC).....I am not a SILENT part of the silent majority. I was silent in my life way too long. When I found my voice to express my thoughts & opinions, that was the last time I was silent. Though I called out my ex's BS long before I ever left him. He was put on notice from the beginning, along wuth my daughter that if they came to me with the TRUTH, we would work through the issues. If I caught them lying, things would NOT go well with them in relationship with me. My daughter got it. My ex's brain never was capable......his problem, his loss. He is the one with the screwed up life I no longer have to be part of

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Default Aug 18, 2020 at 11:23 PM
  #12
Lying can be a pathetic way to keep up the illusion that one is in control. It is a control issue.

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Default Aug 21, 2020 at 02:37 PM
  #13
Sometimes lying is just escape. Escape from life. Escape from pain. "How are you?" "Oh I'm fine." When really one is dying inside.


Sometimes lying is just keeping up appearances. Like "How much did that watch cost?" "Oh, $200" when one really got it at a flea market but doesn't want to look cheap or less successful than friends.

Sometimes lying is to escape punishment. Mom to kid. "Did you eat that cupcake?" Kid "Nope, wasn't me"

Sometimes lying is to gain something like attention or sympathy. "I'm so sick I have the worst cold ever." When one really has a sore throat and a small cough.


Lots of reasons for lying.

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Default Sep 26, 2020 at 11:56 PM
  #14
mythomania/pseudologia fantastica

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