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Default Jan 19, 2018 at 05:01 PM
  #1
I need to hold myself accountable for my overeating and binge eating, so I'm going to use this thread to keep myself accountable, at the very least, to my online anonymous friends. This is not a community thread, but if you would like to help me by sharing your struggles, please feel free to share.

I am making two commitments to myself. To only eat an appropriate serving amount...if I'm hungry again later I can have an appropriate snack. And the second commitment is that I will not eat out or have delivery/takeout for a month. I need to just do a cleanse from junk/fast food.

I can't commit to huge changes right now. With the launch of my business and going back to a 40 hour work week, I just can't concentrate on a meal plan, etc. BUT i can commit to only putting an appropriate amount of food on my plate. Using smaller plates, and making sure I prepare all my own food.

So I'm starting with baby steps.

Thanks for your support.

Seesaw

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Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder
Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia.

Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien

Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less...
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Default Jan 20, 2018 at 03:58 PM
  #2
I wish you luck.

will be following this thread
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Default Jan 20, 2018 at 07:12 PM
  #3
Quote:
Originally Posted by shattered sanity View Post
I wish you luck.

will be following this thread
Thanks, shattered.

I did okay so far today. Not as great as I would have hoped. I've been in a little bit of a funk lately.

I didn't eat breakfast, which caused problems for me. Tomorrow I am going to the grocery store in the morning so I will be able to manage my intake better. I have a hard time though with having food in the house at all because when I was young, I had two older brothers and my parents, while we were not poor, never seemed to keep enough food in the house. My mother did the food preparation and shopping, and she seemed to think that all of us should have the same metabolism as she did, an inactive, mostly sedentary, 135lb middle-aged woman.

There was simply never enough food to eat. Each week when she got home from the grocery, it was a race between myself and my brothers to actually get to food before it was gone. And I usually lost and went hungry because I was the smallest.

Dinner every night was the same. It was a race to get the food on your plate before it was gone, and then even when I had food on my plate, if I didn't eat it quickly enough, my brothers would steal it off of my plate.

Hence now, I'm always afraid food will disappear, which is why I overeat often or binge eat...in addition to doing so for emotional reasons.

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Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder
Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia.

Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien

Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less...
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Default Jan 21, 2018 at 10:16 AM
  #4
OMG...I need breakfast before I go to the park for my daily hike, but I am so wanting to break my own rules and get a sausage biscuit from the drive through...just the thought of that flaky biscuit and warm sausage....ARG!!!

On another note, I have a client that wants to meet over dinner, but I am trying not to eat out! What do I do? Just try to get a salad with no dressing or something? I guess no eating out was unrealistic, and I can make the exception for a business meeting, but I need to figure out how to handle it. He suggested this up scale burger place, but I'm going to suggest a healthier option. I can't be around burgers and fries right now.

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What if I fall? Oh, my dear, but what if you fly?

Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder
Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia.

Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien

Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less...
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Default Jan 21, 2018 at 03:55 PM
  #5
Doing well so far today. Had one serving of rice and beef and broccoli for lunch. Just had some yogurt with applesauce for an afternoon snack, and I have a pork chop with a serving of mashed potatos and brussel sprouts for dinner. I have gotten almost 6,000 steps today so I will be doing two more miles in my evening walk. I admit I'm having urges but it's manageable.

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What if I fall? Oh, my dear, but what if you fly?

Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder
Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia.

Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien

Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less...
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Default Jan 21, 2018 at 04:33 PM
  #6
Good for you for holding yourself accountable. I'm glad you are managing your urges seesaw.
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Default Jan 21, 2018 at 06:17 PM
  #7
Good luck with your eating habits

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Default Jan 22, 2018 at 10:01 PM
  #8
Okay, I managed today pretty well. I had some yogurt for breakfast, a sandwich and chips for lunch, and beef and broccoli with white rice for dinner...and I got my 10,000 steps in... So successful on day 3 of 30.

I was so tempted today when I was out getting my guitar adjusted to get some drive thru, it smelled so good when I drove by...but I'm glad I didn't.

It's funny how often I want to turn to food because of boredom or anxiety. But it's not time to eat so I don't, I just refocus that energy on work, and have a cup of tea or water instead.

Keeping at it.

Seesaw

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What if I fall? Oh, my dear, but what if you fly?

Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder
Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia.

Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien

Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less...
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Default Feb 26, 2018 at 09:23 PM
  #9
I haven't posted in a while. I lost track. Yesterday I hit a real low point that is motivating me to get back on track. Today was better.

My daily caloric intake is around 1700 for today. Burn will be around 2300. It's a low burn day because I didn't get nearly enough steps in. I will work harder on that tomorrow. I did bike on the stationary bike for 45 minutes again, but that is such a low calorie burn. It's fine though, it's a start. I know if I follow my Fit Bit tomorrow and get up for 200 steps every hour I will get a much higher calorie burn.

I need to get my intake down a couple of hundred calories. 1700 isn't bad (I'm very overweight.) I can't function on less than 1500, but I think I can cut out that 200 fairly easily if I change my lunch sandwich to a salad. Could also adjust my breakfast to cut out a couple of hundred calories. I've also learned that fluctuating intake daily, some days a little higher and some days a little lower keeps my body guessing.

I am going to get back down to my healthy weight and kick this habit.

Seesaw

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What if I fall? Oh, my dear, but what if you fly?

Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder
Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia.

Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien

Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less...
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Default Feb 28, 2018 at 07:57 AM
  #10
I did really good yesterday until the end of the day. I still stayed under my calories burned but probably no caloric deficit because of it. I cut out most carbs yesterday and was on track for a great day food wise but then right after dinner my dog had to be rushed to the emergency vet and while my dad and I waited for him we went to have a beer. Didn't blow everything but I realize I made an emotional choice there.

Oh well I still made progress. And dog is okay now.

Will do better today.

Seesaw

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What if I fall? Oh, my dear, but what if you fly?

Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder
Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia.

Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien

Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less...
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Default Mar 01, 2018 at 01:00 PM
  #11
Yesterday was okay in terms of amount of eating but I didn't have healthy eating schedule. I ended up skipping breakfast because of work and then had a healthy lunch, then was starving by dinner time. I stayed within my calorie limits, and I woke up hungry this morning so that is a good sign. I have had lots of issues with my body even exhibiting hunger signs because of so much overeating and emotional eating lately.

I skipped breakfast again today, but had a healthy, early lunch. We are eating out for dinner tonight, so I will try to limit my calories the rest of the day because I know eating out will be higher in calories, and I will also try to eat a reasonable portion and not a huge amount. I can't say whether or not I can limit myself to like a salad for dinner, but I will do my best to limit my portion and make a healthy choice.

Tomorrow I have an 8 hour drive and I'm already prepared with stuff to make sandwiches before I go, so no fast food, and I'll be stopping at the store on my way out of town to get some nuts and carrots for healthy snacking along the way. I honestly don't snack that much on the drive but I do usually stop for a couple of meals. Having a healthy turkey sandwich ready will be nice and also save money.

I wasn't able to get out for exercise yesterday because of the weather and the same today, but will resume once I get back to my home and not in this bad weather.

Seesaw

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What if I fall? Oh, my dear, but what if you fly?

Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder
Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia.

Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien

Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less...
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Default Mar 05, 2018 at 08:30 AM
  #12
I did pretty good during my 8-hour drive. I had made a sandwich for the road and had some other more healthy snacks. Saturday was okay food-wise as well, it was mostly a recovery day from the drive. Sunday I did really well. I worked out and had an event to go to for work, and there was food at the event but I managed to not be tempted and didn't eat anything.

Today is going to be more difficult. I have a meeting with a client and they are ordering pizza for the meeting. I need to check and see how many calories are in a slice because maybe I can have a slice, but I'd also just like to avoid it, it's just not on my menu right now. I think she usually brings salad too, so I can have some salad.

This week is about to get really crazy, as I have a business trip that I leave for tomorrow. I am determined to manage myself and my eating, and my disorders well and make it through this thing...I can collapse when I get home on Friday.

Seesaw

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What if I fall? Oh, my dear, but what if you fly?

Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder
Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia.

Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien

Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less...
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