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Old 01-19-2018, 04:01 PM #1
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I need to hold myself accountable for my overeating and binge eating, so I'm going to use this thread to keep myself accountable, at the very least, to my online anonymous friends. This is not a community thread, but if you would like to help me by sharing your struggles, please feel free to share.

I am making two commitments to myself. To only eat an appropriate serving amount...if I'm hungry again later I can have an appropriate snack. And the second commitment is that I will not eat out or have delivery/takeout for a month. I need to just do a cleanse from junk/fast food.

I can't commit to huge changes right now. With the launch of my business and going back to a 40 hour work week, I just can't concentrate on a meal plan, etc. BUT i can commit to only putting an appropriate amount of food on my plate. Using smaller plates, and making sure I prepare all my own food.

So I'm starting with baby steps.

Thanks for your support.

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Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder
Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia.

Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien

Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less...
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Old 01-20-2018, 02:58 PM #2
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I wish you luck.

will be following this thread
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Old 01-20-2018, 06:12 PM #3
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Quote:
Originally Posted by shattered sanity View Post
I wish you luck.

will be following this thread
Thanks, shattered.

I did okay so far today. Not as great as I would have hoped. I've been in a little bit of a funk lately.

I didn't eat breakfast, which caused problems for me. Tomorrow I am going to the grocery store in the morning so I will be able to manage my intake better. I have a hard time though with having food in the house at all because when I was young, I had two older brothers and my parents, while we were not poor, never seemed to keep enough food in the house. My mother did the food preparation and shopping, and she seemed to think that all of us should have the same metabolism as she did, an inactive, mostly sedentary, 135lb middle-aged woman.

There was simply never enough food to eat. Each week when she got home from the grocery, it was a race between myself and my brothers to actually get to food before it was gone. And I usually lost and went hungry because I was the smallest.

Dinner every night was the same. It was a race to get the food on your plate before it was gone, and then even when I had food on my plate, if I didn't eat it quickly enough, my brothers would steal it off of my plate.

Hence now, I'm always afraid food will disappear, which is why I overeat often or binge eat...in addition to doing so for emotional reasons.
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What if I fall? Oh, my dear, but what if you fly?

Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder
Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia.

Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien

Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less...
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Old 01-21-2018, 09:16 AM #4
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OMG...I need breakfast before I go to the park for my daily hike, but I am so wanting to break my own rules and get a sausage biscuit from the drive through...just the thought of that flaky biscuit and warm sausage....ARG!!!

On another note, I have a client that wants to meet over dinner, but I am trying not to eat out! What do I do? Just try to get a salad with no dressing or something? I guess no eating out was unrealistic, and I can make the exception for a business meeting, but I need to figure out how to handle it. He suggested this up scale burger place, but I'm going to suggest a healthier option. I can't be around burgers and fries right now.

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What if I fall? Oh, my dear, but what if you fly?

Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder
Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia.

Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien

Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less...
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Old 01-21-2018, 02:55 PM #5
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Doing well so far today. Had one serving of rice and beef and broccoli for lunch. Just had some yogurt with applesauce for an afternoon snack, and I have a pork chop with a serving of mashed potatos and brussel sprouts for dinner. I have gotten almost 6,000 steps today so I will be doing two more miles in my evening walk. I admit I'm having urges but it's manageable.
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What if I fall? Oh, my dear, but what if you fly?

Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder
Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia.

Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien

Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less...
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Old 01-21-2018, 03:33 PM #6
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Good for you for holding yourself accountable. I'm glad you are managing your urges seesaw.
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Old 01-21-2018, 05:17 PM #7
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Good luck with your eating habits
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Old 01-22-2018, 09:01 PM #8
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Okay, I managed today pretty well. I had some yogurt for breakfast, a sandwich and chips for lunch, and beef and broccoli with white rice for dinner...and I got my 10,000 steps in... So successful on day 3 of 30.

I was so tempted today when I was out getting my guitar adjusted to get some drive thru, it smelled so good when I drove by...but I'm glad I didn't.

It's funny how often I want to turn to food because of boredom or anxiety. But it's not time to eat so I don't, I just refocus that energy on work, and have a cup of tea or water instead.

Keeping at it.

Seesaw
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What if I fall? Oh, my dear, but what if you fly?

Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder
Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia.

Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien

Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less...
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Old 02-26-2018, 08:23 PM #9
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I haven't posted in a while. I lost track. Yesterday I hit a real low point that is motivating me to get back on track. Today was better.

My daily caloric intake is around 1700 for today. Burn will be around 2300. It's a low burn day because I didn't get nearly enough steps in. I will work harder on that tomorrow. I did bike on the stationary bike for 45 minutes again, but that is such a low calorie burn. It's fine though, it's a start. I know if I follow my Fit Bit tomorrow and get up for 200 steps every hour I will get a much higher calorie burn.

I need to get my intake down a couple of hundred calories. 1700 isn't bad (I'm very overweight.) I can't function on less than 1500, but I think I can cut out that 200 fairly easily if I change my lunch sandwich to a salad. Could also adjust my breakfast to cut out a couple of hundred calories. I've also learned that fluctuating intake daily, some days a little higher and some days a little lower keeps my body guessing.

I am going to get back down to my healthy weight and kick this habit.

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What if I fall? Oh, my dear, but what if you fly?

Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder
Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia.

Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien

Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less...
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Old 02-28-2018, 06:57 AM #10
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I did really good yesterday until the end of the day. I still stayed under my calories burned but probably no caloric deficit because of it. I cut out most carbs yesterday and was on track for a great day food wise but then right after dinner my dog had to be rushed to the emergency vet and while my dad and I waited for him we went to have a beer. Didn't blow everything but I realize I made an emotional choice there.

Oh well I still made progress. And dog is okay now.

Will do better today.

Seesaw
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What if I fall? Oh, my dear, but what if you fly?

Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder
Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia.

Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien

Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less...
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