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Old 07-01-2018, 10:43 AM   #11
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Default Re: Is it time to end dieting?

I have the same trouble. While I haven't my RMR done professionally, I've entered my stats into a few different online BMR and TDEE calculators. I come up with 1600 calories to lose weight. When I stick with it, I don't sleep for the hunger and I experience the same symptoms you have - those of one who is under eating by too much. Which makes me wonder, "what the hell, body?!" I'm not actually starving myself, why does it seem like my body goes into some sort of starvation, survivival mode, at which seems to me(from what I've been reading) like a modest deficit in calories. My body just refuses to do even that slow and safe weight loss of 1lb per week?

I'm worried about my health too. My dad was chubby most of his adult life and he died of pancreatic cancer. But on the daily, my feet hurt, and so do my hips and knees some days. I sweat easily, and it's difficult to find a comfortable sleeping position. I feel tired carrying around this extra weight.

I too want very much to say good bye permanently to any kind of accounting diet. They all make me crazy and miserable very quickly.

I just want to eat healthy, without overeating and get some exercise, and accept that it may take me 2 years or more to reach a healthy-for-me weight. But I'm finding that a challenge.

Like you, my body gives me a tremendously hard time if I try to conventionally diet. I am wildly impressed by your ability to still stick with it for so long. I last about a week at most. But, I guess I have the struggle of clinging to the comfort of food as friend, numbing agent...it's not serving me well.
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Old 07-01-2018, 01:18 PM   #12
Emily Fox Seaton
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Default Re: Is it time to end dieting?

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But on the daily, my feet hurt, and so do my hips and knees some days. I sweat easily, and it's difficult to find a comfortable sleeping position. I feel tired carrying around this extra weight.
That is why I am back on the diet trail. I was having terrible knee problems recently and though weirdly, they went away pretty quickly after starting dieting, i know I can't go back.

There always seems to be this tension where I think I am eating enough to be healthy and then don't lose... and then seem to need to eat way too little to lose. One of of my diets, VLCD, medically supervised... I didn't know it at the time but now know my body was suffering stress. My cholesterol went though the roof, my thyroid went down. At least I know what to look for now.
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Old 07-01-2018, 03:06 PM   #13
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Default Re: Is it time to end dieting?

I wish you the very best, Emily.

I am going to stick to recovery from compulsive/emotional eating, by way of a moderate food plan. Which will result in very slow weight loss, I know. But, for me, if I keep going down the diet route, I will most likely still be this weight, or this weight once again 5 years from now. And I'll still be as crazy inside my head with regards to food and diets. I'm aiming for a healthier body and a less squirrelly brain .

For me, diets are not the solution to why I overeat - although my disordered brain likes to hope they might be. Moderate eating is initially harder, because it doesn't have that instant gratification of quick weight loss...but I know it's the path I need to be pursuing for all around better health.
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Old 05-07-2019, 04:08 AM   #14
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Default Re: Is it time to end dieting?

I'm learning that diets just aren't working for me, and actually causing me to binge & purge more. I do need to watch what I eat but I've decided not to diet anymore.
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Old 05-11-2019, 09:24 AM   #15
Emily Fox Seaton
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Default Re: Is it time to end dieting?

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I'm learning that diets just aren't working for me, and actually causing me to binge & purge more. I do need to watch what I eat but I've decided not to diet anymore.
Interesting since this post was done.

1. I had my RMR tested again. In 2015 (after the liquid diet) it was 1250, in 2018 it was 1590 and now, it was 1750. This is all at the same body weight. So you see the calculators could have been way off. I don't discount that this also could be off, but it gives me an idea that my RMR has increased substantially.

2. For over 10 years I have had low blood pressure and low heart rate. My doctor was stumped. Guess what? After over a year of giving my body a diet break... my BP has risen and my heart rate has risen. Don't worry both are still normal. What does that mean? To me it means my entire metabolic system was reduced when I was dieting, EVEN IF I WASN"T DIETING ALL THE TIME. I can tell you I feel so much better. More energy... just general well being. I suspect this extends to thyroid hormone as well. I used to be cold all the time... no more.

3. I have determined that I burn off more calories when I am NOT dieting, naturally. Simply because your body becomes less efficient. Higher heart rate more work around the body.

Example: RMR of 1200. Multiplied by 1.2 (calculation for exercise that you do every day). TDEE: 1440. RMR of 1600 multiplied by 1.2 = 1920. 240 calories vrs 320 calories. Add exercise to that... say at RMR of 1200 I burned 70 calories walking for 30 minutes; now I burn 100 calories walking for 30 minutes. Everything I do burns more calories the higher my RMR.

4. I am reducing my calories a little about 100 under my RMR. But this has basically stopped my binging. One you are full... you will not desire to binge.

5. I am lifting weights. I purchased a "total gym" and I find that I really like it. I have always been one of those people who felt that exercise DIDN"T make them feel better. But guess what... What if, when your metabolism is suppressed your body says *hey cut it out I have no more energy* and you feel horrible. But when you have appropriate food and blood pressure you finally find yourself feeling good after a work out.

I havne't lost any weight at all. However, I haven't gained. It has been said that lifting weights has you gain about 3 to 8 lbs. So I feel like I can't expect any weight loss for about 8 to 9 months. So I am not looking at the scale until then.
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Old 06-16-2019, 04:52 PM   #16
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Default Re: Is it time to end dieting?

[QUOTE=Wildeve;6557574]Another idea: go see a weight loss doctor or dietician or nutritionist. We eat so much crappy, empty food in our society that sometimes overeating is a symptom of, basically, starvation. [ /QUOTE]

No while i wish weight loss doctors or dietitians would test me for something I am missing I find them completely unhelpful.

And I am an expert at all of this. There is no stone I have left unturned.

Often when I tell them what I am doing with my life they just look at me like they don't believe me. As if I would want this trouble in my life? They always say you need to eat this food or that food, but eating good food can also make you gain weight. They also don't recognize the work needed to eat good food. Such as salads or fresh fish. All of that food goes bad and if you work a job where they don't care about your hours and a commuter system that doesn't care about you... the food will just go bad and you won't have time to buy fresh food.

They say you have to work out and when you tell them your challenges they just don't have any solutions. They ignore your problems and tell you to work out anyway.

I truly don't know what to do. I recently got back to my highest weight and now I am having issues due to it... so I am going to have to go back on the diet train again.
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Old 06-18-2019, 05:53 AM   #17
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Default Re: Is it time to end dieting?

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I totally understand. Do you think you might benefit from seeing a therapist? That's the other thing I was saying. Overeating for me is the result of anxiety and depression related to other problems in my life (unresolved issues in childhood that have basically ruined my life). Do you think this could be the case with you as well?
I don't know. One of the diet plans I did had a therapy component to it. But what I discovered is that basically there are strictures in my life that aren't going to change. Full time work and commute there. These make dieting and or fun difficult to have. So having a candy is something that can quickly give me joy and is widely available while other things are not.

Also difficult is that I don't eat that much. I have an efficient metabolism and thus while other people can eat a lot- one or two treats in a week can stall me. Even if I am otherwise eating well.
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Old 06-18-2019, 06:01 PM   #18
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That's what I meant when I suggested pre-preparing healthy meals and snacks. This way, it is just as easy, or easier, to eat healthy food as it is to eat unhealthy food.
Not judging but how do you do these things on the weekends? My weekends now have about 2 hours each weekend just to relax. The rest of the time is running errands.

So to add preparing food on the weekends just seems like non stop working. Don't forget your suppose to exercise too.

For me I never really can keep up for it for long. From a time stand point OR a physical / mental stand point. I just have so much energy for the weekends and that MUST be spent on the most important errands. If I expend my mental or physical energy than something isn't going to get done. As it is now usually I don't get something done.

Then there are just some foods that just don't work heated up.

I do think it might be time to end dieting for good. Just not worth it anymore.
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Old 06-19-2019, 05:02 AM   #19
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Default Re: Is it time to end dieting?

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I'm going to assume that you're awake for about fifteen hours on any given day. So that's about 30 hours of free time total on weekends. Are you saying that you spend 28 hours on errands and two on relaxation? I find that rather hard to believe. .
As I mentioned, it is a matter of both time and energy. But yes people that work have a lot of errands.

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But I think your real problem is psychological. If you always have a list of reasons,--reasons that frankly do not check out,--why you absolutely can't make the effort to improve your health, then I think getting into therapy is the first step you need to take, not continuing to hyper-focus on dieting and all the excuses why you can't do it. But if you're also not willing to get into therapy, then like I said, just accept that your life isn't going to change. That's the hard truth.
You sound like all the diet people. When their diet and advice doesn't pan out, their ridiculous diet advice - where you have no idea their circumstances, then they blame you. The truth is that I have white knuckled it for most of my adult life prepping food and eating only prepared food and doing what they said. Spending every hour prepping food or going to the gym and fasting or whatever. I have done liquid diets and weight watchers and keto and phentermine and belviq and you name it.. I have done it.

And it didn't work. For any person who actually works there will always be a time when you must go off that merry go round and eat food that isn't premade in your home.

Eventually it is going to fail. Eventually you will get stick of eating the same limited foods that you can prepare on the weekends. Eventually you will get stick of preparing food on the weekends. Eventually your work or something else will demand your free time and weight will come back on.

And if like me you can gain 20 lbs in a few weeks, and then have trouble losing it (because your metabolism has sunk while dieting) you just set yourself up again.

Not gonna listen to the same old diet and exercise bull. It doesn't work.
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Old 06-27-2019, 09:58 PM   #20
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Default Re: Is it time to end dieting?

In general diets do not work for most people, which is understandable from an evolutionary standpoint.

Not to lose weight, but to be healthy and upbeat, why don't you walk one segment of your public transportation commute instead of riding it all the way? Also, do you have a FitBit or similar tracker to track your steps (not calories you eat, but steps, distance, heart rate)?

I think you made the long overdue decision to stop dieting.

Let me also suggest websites with clothing for plus size women, although at 190 you are only very moderately plus size, but still:

Gwynnie Bee

Woman Within

City Chic

Torrid

Roamans

Spend some time on the sites, even if you do not buy anything - you should surround yourself with images of healthy looking, smiling, highly positive and energetic plus size women.

Try to understand that our time on this Earth is very limited and should not be spent dieting. Try to learn to love the body you are in and start clothing that body in beautiful outfits. Also, learn ways to create visual illusions to make yourself look slimmer, such as having vertical lines (open cardigans, long vests, V-necks, very long necklaces).

Oh, any wine! Do you drink wine with your supper, 1 glass a day? Wine in this dosage improves health outcomes AND you would not feel like you are on a punishing diet, but rather that you are treating yourself well.
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