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Member
Member Since Nov 2019
Location: little rock
Posts: 29
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#1
I have been with my wife almost 3 years now and married almost 2. I am really exhausted lately and don't know what to do. I feel close to her one day and then one thing can set her off and everything goes bad. She has been diagnosed with bpd, but isn't on meds or anything.
She gets so angry over things and holds on to that anger. Like today we were going to have lunch until something at home made her angry. So she cancelled on me. I know everyone has a bad day, but I don't think she can deal with even small things without making it so much more. I am a more layed back person. And I think that angers her. She almost makes fun of me for it and tells me I need to be more "woke". I just feel like I get the blame or the brunt of most things. And I feel like I can never do enough. So I have basically shut down and don't have it in me to do things anymore. I mean what's the point if it is never enough, right? |
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Yaowen
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Jan 2020
Location: USA
Posts: 3,618
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#2
I'm really sorry that you are in that situation. I wish I had some good advice but unfortunately I lack that kind of insight. Do you think your wife realizes that her behavior might have some relationship to her untreated BPD? I may be wrong, but I think there are books on how to deal with those afflicted with BPD. Do you think it might be helpful to consult with a psychotherapist privately about how to handle the situation with your wife?
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justneedtotalk76
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Member
Member Since Nov 2019
Location: little rock
Posts: 29
4 26 hugs
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#3
Thank you. I haven't tried to do that yet, but that would be a good idea. The last doctor she went to said she is BPD, but before that she was diagnosed with bi-polar and PTSD. So I'm not really sure what all is going on.
She goes so distant when she is upset. She has threated divorce several times or gives me the silent treatment when she is angry. It makes me feel very insecure in our relationship. I also feel like she blames me when things go wrong. I just don't feel like I am good enough most days. We are different people and I will never do things the way she would. Just like she would never do things the way I would. But shouldn't we be able to accept that in each other and work together? I feel like she gets so angry over the smallest thing and she is missing out on living. It's very overwhelming. And If I try to talk about things it only makes them worse or she says I am making everything about me. I just don't know how to act anymore. |
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Threadtastic Postaholic
Member Since Dec 2018
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 6,006
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#4
Hey @justneedtotalk76
Quote:
__________________ "I carried a watermelon?" President of the no F's given society. |
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Bob1960, justneedtotalk76
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Member
Member Since Nov 2019
Location: little rock
Posts: 29
4 26 hugs
given |
#5
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