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Old 03-09-2019, 01:29 PM   #1
Atronach
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Confused Just Curious If People Have Similar Symptoms / Advice

Basically for years I just had walls all around who I was, I was just outwardly sarcastic, not really that emotional at all and everyone around me including my parents said that I was a sociopath. I've no history of harming anything or the likes I just don't really particularly care either way about others.

Well now I have been thinking about it and I am not really sure that I am feeling my own feelings, or if they are just the feelings that are proper for the situation I'm in. I'm always proper to the situation I'm in but I can't help but to feel like the natural feelings I get are kind of just fake and for other people. And it otherwise feels like I have lost the idea of who I actually am deep down or I have lost the idea of how to play myself.

Just curious if anyone else can give advice on what I may be experiencing, I've been to a couple therapist and their diagnosis was essentially "you're smart" and so I just want to figure stuff out.

Thank you for any help you can offer
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Old 03-09-2019, 06:06 PM   #2
Skeezyks
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Well... I wish I knew what to tell you about this. I've been hiding who I really am for so many decades I no longer have any idea. And, at this point, it really doesn't even matter. I simply keep to myself now.

I recall once, many years ago, going in to see a school counselor at the college I was attending. I described for him what I was experiencing (which I now realize was probably depression... probably related to cPTSD.) And at the end of my session the counselor's response was to tell me I seemed to have a pretty good handle on my situation.

I don't know what to tell you about what you may be experiencing. I think this is the kind of thing a person ought to be able to get from working with a good therapist. But, of course, the key is to find a good therapist. I personally never had much in the way of success with that.

I guess the other way to proceed is to perhaps take some of the quizzes & tests that are on offer here on PC. Here's a link to the listing of quizzes & tests that are avaialble:

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Old 03-09-2019, 11:48 PM   #3
Atronach
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Default Re: Just Curious If People Have Similar Symptoms / Advice

Quote:
Originally Posted by Skeezyks View Post
Well... I wish I knew what to tell you about this. I've been hiding who I really am for so many decades I no longer have any idea. And, at this point, it really doesn't even matter. I simply keep to myself now.

I recall once, many years ago, going in to see a school counselor at the college I was attending. I described for him what I was experiencing (which I now realize was probably depression... probably related to cPTSD.) And at the end of my session the counselor's response was to tell me I seemed to have a pretty good handle on my situation.

I don't know what to tell you about what you may be experiencing. I think this is the kind of thing a person ought to be able to get from working with a good therapist. But, of course, the key is to find a good therapist. I personally never had much in the way of success with that.

I guess the other way to proceed is to perhaps take some of the quizzes & tests that are on offer here on PC. Here's a link to the listing of quizzes & tests that are avaialble:


Thank you for your kind words however, I think you may be a little bit misguided. You said that you have been hiding who you really are for many decades and that it no longer matters anymore. Well it does matter, the only thing to strive for in this life is for a sense of belonging within ourselves and happiness. Im not sure how happy you are but never quit trying to find yourself, digging through the mire and murk of what makes you, you, you are important, just considering your presence on the forums you consistently put in kind words for others and seek to aid people, so I will start you out in discovering fully who you really are. You are a good person, you have a kind soul, you help others and have an innate altruism, you bring warmth to other peoples hearts and have likely helped a lot of people in your time here and you should be very proud of your heart and your dedication, so try not to give up on yourself and finding out more about yourself, it is a life long struggle but it's worth it.
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Old 03-16-2019, 02:50 AM   #4
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Default Re: Just Curious If People Have Similar Symptoms / Advice

The sociopath thing really makes sense here to me, as I got the feeling from your post in the DID forum that you have quite a few narcissistic traits. I have read before that not every narcissist is a sociopath, but every sociopath is a narcissist.
I don't have any advice for you sorry, but this does help put your other post in the DID forum into context.
Sociopaths aren't necessarily bad or criminal or hurtful towards others (some can be, but not all are), it's just that they don't experience emotions in the same way that other people do. Like you explained in your post here, they can "act" emotions, as in they know what emotions are socially appropriate in any given situation, they just don't feel them. There are advantages to that. And disadvantages of course.
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Old 03-17-2019, 03:43 AM   #5
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Default Re: Just Curious If People Have Similar Symptoms / Advice

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Originally Posted by Amyjay View Post
The sociopath thing really makes sense here to me, as I got the feeling from your post in the DID forum that you have quite a few narcissistic traits. I have read before that not every narcissist is a sociopath, but every sociopath is a narcissist.
I don't have any advice for you sorry, but this does help put your other post in the DID forum into context.
Sociopaths aren't necessarily bad or criminal or hurtful towards others (some can be, but not all are), it's just that they don't experience emotions in the same way that other people do. Like you explained in your post here, they can "act" emotions, as in they know what emotions are socially appropriate in any given situation, they just don't feel them. There are advantages to that. And disadvantages of course.
Amyjay, I would like to note that I am not a sociopath merely confused with the nature of my own emotions. Sometimes I do feel pure joy, or guilt, or sadness, or any other feeling on the spectrum, other times my emotions confuse me, I am unsure why the feelings I experience are the ones I am experiencing for those situations and I am unsure if they are my emotions or just me acting out emotions that make sense. But I still do have genuine feelings.
People around me call me sociopathic, but that does not make me one. My family greatly "discouraged" my outward expressions, while I did indeed used to have narcissistic tendencies I no longer have those. And my post on my friend with DID goes only up to around 1.5 - 2 years ago.
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