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Wolf1685
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Default Dec 22, 2019 at 04:54 PM
  #1
Personally I find this pointless, but on the otherhand I find it appealing when people try to help because i know nothing any therapist and/or person can do or say will ever fix, change, or help with whatever is going on in my head.

Subconsciously im a vindictivly evil person. Outside my head, for the most part, im generally a decent human. On the other hand I lack empathy, sympathy, or any other form of emotional reaction when it comes to others feelings. big life events such as death or illness doesnt effect me. Even family and close friends that I love, ill lie and tell them that if they were hurt or died that i would be sad, but the truth is i couldnt care less to a certin degree.

I do have feelings of sadness, but consciously it typically only last for a few min then i move on like nothing happen. Acting as if it actually bothers me to humans around me. I rely more on logic and rational reactions to things then my emotins to control how i act or feel. Ive seen countless deaths happen in front of me and either just smiled and laughed about it or just shrugged my shoulders and was like "well that sucks" then moved on from it and handled my life accordingly after as if it was a typical occurrence in my life.

To give more of an example. My Grandfather, whom was one of my best friends growing past away a few years ago due to cancer. Logically in my head he was old and sick so duh he was going to die. the problem is was i was never sad about it i personally didnt care if he lived or died. I was just like welp **** happens. It had nothing to do with the fact of me being able to process over the corse of time that made it easier on me. I just didnt feel anything.

My mother walkes into my room at the time told me he past away i looked at her and just said ok then went about my day like it was a typical Tuesday. As years go by my lack of empathy and sympathy for others gets lower and lower. The odd thing is though is no matter what, Im happy. I love who i am and in my opinion if you dont like it, tough ****.

This is only breaking into the surface of my lack of emotions. But therapy wont work because i know what youll say. I know how youll approach it. I know what they will suggest. But im not going to change because like i said if you dont like 100% of who i am. Thats for you to fix not for me to change. Im not going to take any pills because thats fake therapy.

All pills do is react and/or release certin chimicals either into or thats already in your brain. Which then makes you think that youre feeling a different way where as subconsciously and in reality the therapist almost did nothing and because they have trouble doing so they give you that so that throughout your life youll require those pills to act "normal". A sociological miscalculation in my book that does nothing for people.

Where as training someones brain to naturally cope with the situation they are going through instead of just relying on pills to do it for you. Thats not help thats procrastination. You can say and react to this post all you want i wont care what you have to say. It wont bother me it wont fix me and it will be a waist of your time.

But i do insist that you try so i can have a good laugh. Feel free to ask me anything. I pose no harm to myself or others. I just dont care about most people or what happens to them. But again feel free to poke into the darkness and see where it leads you.

Last edited by FooZe; Dec 23, 2019 at 07:06 PM.. Reason: removed poll
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Thanks for this!
echoing, Skeezyks

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Skeezyks
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Smile Dec 23, 2019 at 08:37 PM
  #2
Hello Wolf: I see this is your first post here on PC. So... welcome to Psych Central. Sorry I don't have any interest in "poking into the darkness." But perhaps others here on PC will. I hope you find PC to be of benefit.

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echoing
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Default Dec 31, 2019 at 01:03 PM
  #3
Hi Wolf1685. I'm probably not poking into the darkness, but I think I could know what you mean. I've been pretty unaffected by death and illness too unless I'd see someone I care about (close friends) affected by it adversely. Maybe there's some kind of subconscious detachment? Logic is often used as a defence mechanism...
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