advertisement
Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 07-31-2020, 11:20 AM   #1
seesaw
Human
 
seesaw's Avatar
seesaw grieving
 
Member Since: Apr 2014
Location: Home
Posts: 7,321 (SuperPoster!)
5 yr Member
1,003 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Medically Related PTSD

In addition to cPTSD, when I sought treatment I suffered malpractice and a string of related traumas inflicted by medical professionals, resulting in medically related PTSD.

Seeking medical care is very triggering for me, and since I'm an independent patient advocate, and studying to take the voluntary credential and licensing, a lot of my symptoms are being triggered as I study (flashbacks, nightmares, etc.).

I'm curious if anyone else has PTSD related to medical care and what your symptoms are like? I just kind of feel alone in this sometimes.
__________________


What if I fall? Oh, my dear, but what if you fly?

Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder
Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia.

Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien

Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less...
seesaw is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Hugs from:
"Thanks for this!" says:

advertisement
Old 07-31-2020, 03:26 PM   #2
Open Eyes
Legendary Wise Elder
 
Open Eyes's Avatar
Open Eyes Not a Unicorn, just another horse
 
Member Since: Mar 2011
Location: Northeast USA
Posts: 20,242 (SuperPoster!)
8 yr Member
17.9k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Re: Medically Related PTSD

Actually seesaw I do have ptsd challenges due to medical traumas and being treated badly.

I went in to have a colonoscopy and endoscopy and I woke up during them scoping down my throat and it scared the hell out of me. And when they did the colonoscopy they hit my spleen leaving me with damage and experiencing slow internal bleeding.

I actually gave myself two days to recover before working. By the third day of working I began to feel strange. By the time I got home I was feeling pain and was dizzy. I was treated badly for asking for help to drive to the nearest ER. Once I got there they gave me morphine for the pain which was getting worse and worse. I am actually surprised they gave me so much morphine not knowing what was wrong with me. I doubt they would do that now.

Yet I was treated like I was inconveniencing everyone as they did an MRI and had to wait to hear back from a doctor what the results were. They all wanted to close and go home and my problem was keeping them there. Then in a flash the mood changed when the doctor told them to get me to the hospital STAT because I was bleeding internally and could die.

After that I was put in ICU thinking I was going to be rushed into surgery like when I almost died when my appendix ruptured. I remembered thinking in the ambulance that I was going to end up having my spleen removed and have another ugly wound like before when they opened my entire body cavity up.

Yet they never rushed me into surgery and no one even told me anything. No doctor talked to me to let me know they were going to wait and see if the bleeding would stop. I was actually left there alone and not even my family said anything to me. I just laid there in the critical care unit.

Truth is that because I was injured by a doctor during a procedure elsewhere no one wanted to say anything as I was now considered a liability. It was horrible not knowing anything and just laying alone in critical care. Not knowing anything and just getting dosed with morphine.

No one wanted to talk to me and I could not understand why. It was awful! It would be weeks before I would finally hear why. I had to make my GP see me as he was the one who referred me to the doctor who did the colonoscopy. Finally he explained to me that the reason I faced the challenges I did was due to fear of liability.

I have a few medical challenges where I was treated badly by both doctors and nurses an EMT and other medical care workers.

As a result I genuinely have a problem with going to doctors and being treated by medical staff. I really could add so much more in this post.
Open Eyes is online now   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
"Thanks for this!" says:
Old 08-01-2020, 12:36 AM   #3
seesaw
Human
 
seesaw's Avatar
seesaw grieving
 
Member Since: Apr 2014
Location: Home
Posts: 7,321 (SuperPoster!)
5 yr Member
1,003 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Re: Medically Related PTSD

Thanks, OE.

I'm fortunate that I've found a therapist that I like, which I thought would never happen after I moved and had to leave my old therapist. I want to see a psychiatrist to get a PRN of klonopin but psychiatrists are the ones I mistrust the most. Well, nurses too. Well, all MDs too. I've had to file so many grievances against doctors behaving badly, and I really thought it was just me, but working in healthcare research and actually meeting doctors in a professional capacity, it's not "just me." There is a lot of arrogance, huge lack of respect for patient's rights and many violations of patient's rights, and just overall inappropriate behavior that doesn't contribute to a therapeutic relationship.

It's a challenge because I get triggered reading and doing my work for school, I get triggered in my actual work with providers, and then I just get triggered for no reason, lol. Flashbacks and dissociation have been bad lately. Going through periods when I'm holding on to a thin shred of reality, wondering if what's currently occurring for me is "right now" or this is really 3 years ago or 5 years ago, or some other time.

Of course that couples with my other trauma/PTSD and it just feels like it's getting out of hand a bit. My therapist and I discussed a few months ago that as school ramped up and I continued to expand my work, that I'd probably become more symptomatic. So it's just par for the course, in a way, I guess.
__________________


What if I fall? Oh, my dear, but what if you fly?

Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder
Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia.

Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien

Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less...
seesaw is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Hugs from:
Old 08-01-2020, 03:14 PM   #4
Open Eyes
Legendary Wise Elder
 
Open Eyes's Avatar
Open Eyes Not a Unicorn, just another horse
 
Member Since: Mar 2011
Location: Northeast USA
Posts: 20,242 (SuperPoster!)
8 yr Member
17.9k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Re: Medically Related PTSD

I can understand how even reading certain medical related material can bring about unwanted feelings and memories. You are absolutely correct though about treatment providers being cold and distant as I have experienced that myself. However when I talked to health care providers often what I learn is how they are under so much pressure from insurance companies not only about patient liability but how they are instructed not to say anything that can possibly convey any mistake was made.

Then they also have to wait for approval when they want patients to have certain tests and insurance companies often require less expensive tests or procedures first when the doctor for example wants an mri instead of an X-ray.

Also insurance premiums for their personal coverage to practice is extremely expensive so they earn less when given how many years they invest to be a doctor is expensive and they tend to have too many restrictions that interrupt with the kind of care they want to provide their patients. This is part of why there is a shortage of doctors including psychiatrists.

And many of the ones we had got so fed up they retired early. So a lot of this frustration filters down to patients. Some states are worse than others in this respect.
Open Eyes is online now   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Old 08-04-2020, 06:07 AM   #5
seesaw
Human
 
seesaw's Avatar
seesaw grieving
 
Member Since: Apr 2014
Location: Home
Posts: 7,321 (SuperPoster!)
5 yr Member
1,003 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Re: Medically Related PTSD

Quote:
Originally Posted by Open Eyes View Post
I can understand how even reading certain medical related material can bring about unwanted feelings and memories. You are absolutely correct though about treatment providers being cold and distant as I have experienced that myself. However when I talked to health care providers often what I learn is how they are under so much pressure from insurance companies not only about patient liability but how they are instructed not to say anything that can possibly convey any mistake was made.


Then they also have to wait for approval when they want patients to have certain tests and insurance companies often require less expensive tests or procedures first when the doctor for example wants an mri instead of an X-ray.


Also insurance premiums for their personal coverage to practice is extremely expensive so they earn less when given how many years they invest to be a doctor is expensive and they tend to have too many restrictions that interrupt with the kind of care they want to provide their patients. This is part of why there is a shortage of doctors including psychiatrists.


And many of the ones we had got so fed up they retired early. So a lot of this frustration filters down to patients. Some states are worse than others in this respect.
OE, I'm not sure what this has to do with me having PTSD from medical care. A treatment provider being worried about insurance is a far cry away from experiencing malpractice that nearly kills you. I'm going to ask you not to turn this into a "have compassion for providers" thread when I'm struggling with my mental health due to what some providers did to me. I know you mean well, but this is not useful support to me. These people, regardless of being providers, acted in unethical and even illegal ways, and nearly killed me. And now I am challenged to seek Healthcare because of it. I suffered and survived abuse at the hands of these practitioners. I don't need to see anything from their point of view. This isn't a disagreement between me and them.
__________________


What if I fall? Oh, my dear, but what if you fly?

Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder
Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia.

Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien

Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less...
seesaw is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Hugs from:
"Thanks for this!" says:
Old 08-04-2020, 09:33 AM   #6
Open Eyes
Legendary Wise Elder
 
Open Eyes's Avatar
Open Eyes Not a Unicorn, just another horse
 
Member Since: Mar 2011
Location: Northeast USA
Posts: 20,242 (SuperPoster!)
8 yr Member
17.9k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Re: Medically Related PTSD

I have the same problem in that I have been traumatized several times by both doctors and other healthcare workers. I was not trying to excuse any of the bad behaviors that take place either. My effort was geared more towards the problem being with the overall healthcare system itself. The therapy I have had has also been met with agreement that our current healthcare system is genuinely broken and my therapists have said they were not surprised to learn of the traumatic experiences I have had. Also, when it comes to looking at our broken health care system, it's important to include how "insurance companies" are very much a part of the problem as well. I have experienced wrong diagnoses and been on the receiving end of "mistakes" made while treating me as well. Along with being treated very badly when that was the last thing I needed.
Open Eyes is online now   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Old 08-04-2020, 12:51 PM   #7
seesaw
Human
 
seesaw's Avatar
seesaw grieving
 
Member Since: Apr 2014
Location: Home
Posts: 7,321 (SuperPoster!)
5 yr Member
1,003 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Re: Medically Related PTSD

Quote:
Originally Posted by Open Eyes View Post
I have the same problem in that I have been traumatized several times by both doctors and other healthcare workers. I was not trying to excuse any of the bad behaviors that take place either. My effort was geared more towards the problem being with the overall healthcare system itself. The therapy I have had has also been met with agreement that our current healthcare system is genuinely broken and my therapists have said they were not surprised to learn of the traumatic experiences I have had. Also, when it comes to looking at our broken health care system, it's important to include how "insurance companies" are very much a part of the problem as well. I have experienced wrong diagnoses and been on the receiving end of "mistakes" made while treating me as well. Along with being treated very badly when that was the last thing I needed.
Same here. When I tell my therapists what happened to me, they are both shocked and not surprised. When I talk to doctors, in my professional capacity, and they know my history because I share openly as a way to teach, they are defensive that they would never hurt a patient and yet also acknowledge the system sets them up to fail. But it's hard for them to swallow that the system of medicine is actually faulty - and as we progress and evolve, it's becoming clear that it's faulty. So I get what you're saying, and when I'm in the mind to be the patient advocate and facilitate communication between providers and patients, I'm there.

But right now I'm dealing with my dissociation and flashbacks, and worrying about provider barriers is not my concern.
__________________


What if I fall? Oh, my dear, but what if you fly?

Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder
Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia.

Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien

Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less...
seesaw is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Old 08-04-2020, 06:38 PM   #8
Open Eyes
Legendary Wise Elder
 
Open Eyes's Avatar
Open Eyes Not a Unicorn, just another horse
 
Member Since: Mar 2011
Location: Northeast USA
Posts: 20,242 (SuperPoster!)
8 yr Member
17.9k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Re: Medically Related PTSD

I understand and itís very hard to get others to understand this challenge too.

With my recent experience I had my hat on because my hat helps SO MUCH to keep me grounded. I can pull it down even over my eyes if need be and itís soft and comforting. The staff would not let me keep it on my head even though I tried to explain I have ptsd and it helps prevent me from having flashbacks.

I canít have medical staff crowding me. It triggers me to the life saving surgery and all I went through with that.
Open Eyes is online now   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Old 08-05-2020, 05:23 PM   #9
Toughcooki
Member
Toughcooki has no updates.
 
Member Since: Jul 2020
Location: Texas
Posts: 42 (SuperPoster!)
34 hugs
given
Default Re: Medically Related PTSD

I think I may have some PTSD due to a medical procedure I was forced to endure that was very similar to a childhood assault I endured (held down, legs spread, etc) - after it happened I can't bring myself to even go to the town where the procedure occurred. I have so many traumas though that I think this one is just a sprinkle on the icing on the cake.
Toughcooki is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Hugs from:
"Thanks for this!" says:
Old 08-06-2020, 09:00 AM   #10
seesaw
Human
 
seesaw's Avatar
seesaw grieving
 
Member Since: Apr 2014
Location: Home
Posts: 7,321 (SuperPoster!)
5 yr Member
1,003 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Re: Medically Related PTSD

Quote:
Originally Posted by Toughcooki View Post
I think I may have some PTSD due to a medical procedure I was forced to endure that was very similar to a childhood assault I endured (held down, legs spread, etc) - after it happened I can't bring myself to even go to the town where the procedure occurred. I have so many traumas though that I think this one is just a sprinkle on the icing on the cake.
That sounds awful, Touchcooki. I'm sorry you went through that, and thank you for sharing and commiserating with me.
__________________


What if I fall? Oh, my dear, but what if you fly?

Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder
Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia.

Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien

Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less...
seesaw is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Hugs from:
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off



All times are GMT -5. The time now is 11:36 PM.

Powered by vBulletin® — Copyright © 2000 - 2020, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.



 

advertisement

Psych Central Forums

Psych Central is the leading mental health website, overseen by mental health professionals since 1995.

 

Helplines and Lifelines

The material on this site is for informational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider.

Always consult your doctor or mental health professional before trying anything you read here.
Please read the full disclaimer.