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Member Since Feb 2016
Location: Doing donuts in the parking lot
Posts: 4,270
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#1
when i was a child there was no choice. people made choices for me. now i make my own, so i am i so stagnant? i make no choices, not any real ones anymore. i just stay here, day after day, lost in my mind.
how do i get out of this? i have no sense of direction. where do i go? what do i do to move forward? __________________ "Give him his freedom and he'll remember his humanity." |
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Fuzzybear, Open Eyes, Yaowen
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Jan 2020
Location: USA
Posts: 3,618
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#2
Dear Mtn Time2896,
I wish I had some helpful wisdom to share, but sadly I don't. What keeps me going is trying to do a little good every day. Maybe I can say a kind word to someone or give a little bread to the hungry birds. This seems to keep me going. But since I am not a physician or medical professional, I cannot offer any advice that you or anyone else could or should rely upon. I do hope you find something that helps give you a sense of direction, purpose and meaning. I have felt what you have felt many times in my life. And it is an awful feeling. I think you are very heroic to be carrying the heavy weight you carry. Sincerely yours, Yao Wen |
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Fuzzybear, MtnTime2896
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MtnTime2896
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Wisest Elder Ever
Member Since Nov 2002
Location: Cave.
Posts: 96,331
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#3
I'm sending hugs and much respect
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MtnTime2896
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MtnTime2896
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Mar 2011
Location: Northeast USA
Posts: 23,117
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#4
When someone struggles with ptsd it means they experienced something that deeply traumatized them, could even be through experiencing several things that traumatized the person. Often the case is the individual did not expect to experience these things, nor did they have any life skills to know how to react to whatever it was.
What can happen without the person realizing it is they literally function in a hypervigiliant state always on guard, looking over their shoulder, anticipating the next thing they have to live through not knowing what to do and it's typically due to lack of life experience. From what you have shared Mtn Time is that you faced challenges from an early age. So, you feel stuck because you are recognizing as you mentioned that others made decisions for you. This means you feel you have little experience making your own decisions which is what most do and they don't always make the right decisions, we all learn by whatever results from our choices. As we go through life, we gradually get better at making decisions. No one JUST has all the answers. We all learn by "doing" and slowly developing skills. You have been stuck in a loop where you tend to relive experiences in your past where you faced challenges you did not quite know how to navigate. When we don't know how to navigate challenges, we become fearful and we struggle with our sense of self esteem and personal ability. The ONLY way to break free from that is to begin making choices, even if they are small choices until we can gain our sense of ability to navigate more and more. That means for a while we can be uncomfortable, worry more than we should, even feel tired when we do make the effort. Fear is something that is tiring both physically and mentally. The only way to build one's skills is in fact gradually. Also, the one thing that is extremely important is to develop patience with self as we take even baby steps to regain or develop our ability to navigate. |
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MtnTime2896
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MtnTime2896
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