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Magnate
Member Since Aug 2006
Location: U.S.
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Jan 28, 2008 at 05:49 PM
#1
Maybe this is a dumb question, and I apologize if it is... but I was just wondering if you can experience PTSD from the loss (not from death) of a significant person in your life?
(In my case, a mother-like figure) Just trying to understand.... Thanks __________________ The unexamined life is not worth living. -Socrates |
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2003
Location: Coram Deo
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Jan 28, 2008 at 07:48 PM
#2
It doesn't really fit the diagnoses requirements, unless that person's passing was traumatic in itself and you were involved or around to witness it. Does this makes sense? There has to be some sense of fear of dying or nearly dying personally for the dx to fit.
Overwhelming grief is a very strong emotion though, and I'm sorry you are experiencing it. However, if say that person that passed caused a person to be traumatized, what that someone might experience is a triggering of those intense emotions connected with the PTSD from the prior trauma, once the victimizer passes. Does this makes sense, also? __________________ |
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Magnate
Member Since Aug 2006
Location: U.S.
Posts: 2,723
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Jan 28, 2008 at 08:00 PM
#3
umm... you lost me on the second one
 ... sorry!
__________________ The unexamined life is not worth living. -Socrates |
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2003
Location: Coram Deo
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Jan 28, 2008 at 08:13 PM
#4
Ok. (((hugs)))
Jacq, this is purely hypothetical, ok? If the passing of your relative was not in itself a trauma such as a car accident where you were also in the car, and you are experiencing more emotions than the normal levels of grief (anger, denial etc) there is a possiblity that this person who passed may have "abused" you or a sibling (in your presence) and the emotions arising are from that trauma. Did this help? __________________ |
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Magnate
Member Since Aug 2006
Location: U.S.
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Jan 28, 2008 at 08:18 PM
#5
umm, kind of
 But see, for me, no one died .. They're just not longer in my life. I was just really (emotionally) hurt by this "mother-figure" - not actually a relative - and for reasons I don't care to talk about, her an I no longer have contact. Well, I should say, that she doesn't feel the need to contact me anymore. does this make more sense? Sorry for all the confusion/me misunderstanding
__________________ The unexamined life is not worth living. -Socrates |
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Grand Poohbah
Member Since Feb 2007
Location: The place where X marks the spot.
Posts: 1,848
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Jan 28, 2008 at 09:03 PM
#6
<blockquote>
jacq10: I was just wondering if you can experience PTSD from the loss (not from death) of a significant person in your life? ... (In my case, a mother-like figure) If I understand you correctly, you lost someone who was very important to you but this loss was not due to their death. What seems to be most important to your situation is the circumstances surrounding the loss and the fact that this person served as a "mother-like" figure in your life. Can you identify the emotions you feel in regard to the reasons for the loss? Can you identify the emotions you feel in regard to the loss of this "mother-like" figure in your life? Those are probably the areas you need to focus your attention on. If your relationship with your real mother included traumatic aspects or had a traumatic ending, I could see how this more recent loss might stir up some unresolved trauma for you. It might be helpful to examine your relationship with your own mother as well to see if what happened in your relationship with her is having any impact on what's happening now. __________________ ~ Kindness is cheap. It's unkindness that always demands the highest price. |
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Magnate
Member Since Aug 2006
Location: U.S.
Posts: 2,723
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Jan 29, 2008 at 12:43 AM
#7
Oh man
I can't even go there ... this is too much. I shouldn't have posted anything ...I can't get these thoughts to leave me the heck alone. EVERYTHING is triggering. Why do I need her so badly?  .... I'm sorry guys, I do appreciate your responses ... I just.. not now. __________________ The unexamined life is not worth living. -Socrates |
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Grand Poohbah
Member Since Feb 2007
Location: The place where X marks the spot.
Posts: 1,848
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Jan 29, 2008 at 01:30 AM
#8
<blockquote>
Do take your own time jacq10. Obviously, there's something here that's very painful for you. Touching that or bringing it out, is comparable to exposing a raw nerve. It can really REALLY hurt and we often do need to pull back from it a bit. This can be a good time to allow yourself to practice self-mercy and self-compassion. No matter the circumstances, it can hurt terribly to lose the people we love. Part of healing is allowing ourselves to feel the pain of that loss, but if it's a really big loss, we often can only deal with it one small piece at a time. This is why when we need to pull back, we should. __________________ ~ Kindness is cheap. It's unkindness that always demands the highest price. |
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Pandita-in-training
Member Since Sep 2006
Location: Maryland
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Jan 29, 2008 at 10:12 AM
#9
All loss causes grief and the grief process can be quite long and intense but is its own natural process rather than an illness or unnatural "problem" like PTSD is.
Here's what happens in the grief process: http://www.uvm.edu/~chwb/counseling/...urces/faq.html __________________ "Never give a sword to a man who can't dance." ~Confucius |
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Guest
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Jan 29, 2008 at 03:17 PM
#10
ty(perna))))))) for putting that site up
(jac)))))) its ok to be sad thats all i can say but get help if you need it |
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Magnate
Member Since Aug 2006
Location: U.S.
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Jan 29, 2008 at 04:32 PM
#11
ty all...
__________________ The unexamined life is not worth living. -Socrates |
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Member
Member Since Feb 2007
Location: Canada
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Aug 20, 2011 at 12:57 AM
#12
I want to tell you is from my own perspective, and what I did is not the same as what another might be. YES, I HAVE PTSD in large part due to shocking, traumatic and sudden loss. Have had PTSD for 24 years now. I tried to take a dirt nap several times but I survived and continue to survive due to the intervention of God and nothing else. All I said was, "Help me!" and He did.
God gives YOU grace to live through it all. Whether or not you feel close to Jesus, ask Him anyway! He's always waiting for your invitation. Take care! 'Jesus Loves YOU!!', says Mother Angelica. Google her! EWTN/Mother Angelica peej __________________  peej 
Last edited by peejcrafter; Aug 20, 2011 at 02:08 AM.. Reason: to make what I'm saying make sense and to wish her well |
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Member
Member Since Jan 2009
Location: U.S.A.
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Aug 27, 2011 at 06:13 PM
#13
Yes I think absolutely. "Loss" is not always merely physical, after all we are psychosocial beings, I think many people who "lose" a partner to Alzheimer's feel this way.
The criteria for PTSD are being expanded as they should be in my opinion, to take into account things such as the meaning of the event to the person, and how their ability to tolerate the experience matches up to the level of stress. __________________ "Psychiatric diagnoses are very useful metaphors." |
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Grand Member
Member Since Sep 2014
Location: somewhere between hell and back over the rainbow
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Aug 27, 2015 at 04:20 AM
#14
hi jacq10,
I have experienced a loss this year . my choir director retired this May . im still dealing w the loss still and im afraid to go back to church and choir due in part that my former choir won't be back cuz that now that she is retired . she was like a mother figure to me and my confident for 15 years as my choir director 
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