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Default Feb 27, 2020 at 11:44 PM
  #1
This nice new dr. Threw some more at me, they are lovely, but just not enough to make me not care about the real issues of irreparable, dysfunctional relationships. Nice try though. I guess I should call him tomorrow and he’ll tweak them to be more? He asked how we found him. I think this means he doesn’t even want to deal with me. I’d like to give him a break, too. He didn’t need to have to deal with me. I need to be removed and taken far away to a totally new land to be well... maybe the Land of Oz?

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Default Mar 03, 2020 at 11:36 AM
  #2
I think your feelings are very understandable.
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Default Mar 09, 2020 at 04:42 PM
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I think your feelings are certainly understandable, but I can't tell if you know that medication is not the end-all-be-all and can only do so much without doing other things or if you genuinely expect medication to be the ultimate solution.
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Default Mar 09, 2020 at 08:17 PM
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I think your feelings are certainly understandable, but I can't tell if you know that medication is not the end-all-be-all and can only do so much without doing other things or if you genuinely expect medication to be the ultimate solution.
I don’t think I have an ultimate solution. The meds are helping though, while talk therapy didn’t do any good. I’m not really happy with some of the people I’m surrounded by. But I’m not sure how much is them and how much is a problem with me. So I cope.

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Default Mar 16, 2020 at 05:44 AM
  #5
I have a lot of concern about this new doctor and the meds. I am having a hell of a time finding the strength to find a doctor to truly diagnose me. This one is only a med manager, asked me some questions, and prescribed without giving me a diagnosis. Said he had to ‘rebuild my engine’. I read up on the meds and am terrified as to what they say they are for and their side effects. I must be really sick.

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Default Mar 16, 2020 at 06:46 AM
  #6
I'm sure you're already doing this, but it's important to talk with the doctor about both your concerns and your frustrations. If a diagnosis is important to you, make sure to ask for one. If there are concerns about the medications and what they're used for, ask. It's always good to know the reasoning behind what a doctor prescribes. Sometimes medications may be for one thing (i.e. psychosis) but may help with other things (i.e. mood, sleep, appetite, thought organization). Knowing more about the reasoning your doctor has can help you not only understand where treatment is going but to also have more input. You can offer feedback and evidence that will be helpful.

Ultimately, what are you hoping medication will do? Sometimes we have expectations that medication can't meet.

If relationships are more of an issue, it may be important to address those through a specific type of therapy such as Interpersonal Psychotherapy or Dialectical Behavior Therapy. What is it about the relationships that makes them difficult? What do you need from people that you're not getting? Absent of relationships, what are you doing to take care of yourself when you're alone and distressed?

It sounds like you haven't had much luck with therapy in the past, but it can be beneficial if you find a good fit. Sometimes it takes a lot of trial and error to find that fit.

Whatever happens, I wish you luck!
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Default Mar 16, 2020 at 06:57 AM
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I have a lot of concern about this new doctor and the meds. I am having a hell of a time finding the strength to find a doctor to truly diagnose me. This one is only a med manager, asked me some questions, and prescribed without giving me a diagnosis. Said he had to ‘rebuild my engine’. I read up on the meds and am terrified as to what they say they are for and their side effects. I must be really sick.
Fear of meds, fear you must be really sick--been there--anxiety/fear is the root of some of these feelings. No opinion on if this doctor is right or wrong. For me, the belief that God protects me unless my problems are for a reason--to teach me lessons I needed helps the most with the fear...
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Default Mar 17, 2020 at 03:40 AM
  #8
I don’t feel good about taking these psych meds. I don’t feel I’ve had an adequate psych evaluation...ever. I’ve had depression and emotional issues going on now for 25 years due to a bad relationship with my husband, mostly. I want to go away somewhere, get away from him, and get a real evaluation when I’ve had a nice, long break from him.

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Default Mar 18, 2020 at 09:19 PM
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I’m not going anywhere. I obviously have an anxiety disorder and the panic attacks will continue. I’ll give this doctor and the meds a chance.

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Default Mar 19, 2020 at 01:43 PM
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Sometimes meds can be helpful. I'm not saying they're helpful for everyone, but they have been for me in the past. And, I am working towards going down on them now (which is also hard) because my doctor thinks I can *gradually* go down on them. Anyway, I hope you can find some relief from panic attacks.
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Default Mar 24, 2020 at 11:45 AM
  #11
Now I got upped big time because I called doc and told him I’m too depressed to get out of bed. But we didn’t have a pandemic when I saw him last. He gave me strong meds and threatened putting me inpatient and that I didn’t want that.

So, if your ‘loved ones’ are A holes and treat you so badly you can’t function, crank up the meds until you can cope?

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Default Apr 09, 2020 at 02:15 PM
  #12
The meds are not helping me feel any different. The same problem is the same problem. But I am just walking away and not fighting. Is that an improvement? Would I have stopped fighting anyway, realizing the futility? Just walk away and find a distraction. We can’t always get what we want, and I am very blessed to have as much as I do.

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Default Apr 15, 2020 at 04:51 AM
  #13
i have been on meds the bulk of my adult life and I am 58 now. So I have been on some real doozies. There isn't an AP that I haven't tried and I have been on most of the ADs and mood stabilizers.
I know without meds I am unmanageable and with them I am for the most part functional. I tried the therapy route too and it helped for a while but now I just can't get into it.
I think we have to try and keep our eyes open, and our minds open to every avenue to help us get by.
Its not weak to use meds to manage our lives, its brave.
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Default Apr 15, 2020 at 08:25 AM
  #14
The meds may be working because I am being less difficult. I’m more bland. I’m locked in with my family, so, of course, I am intentionally being my nicest so we all get along and don’t crack up. I might have been acting this way without any meds. I wish I wasn’t so confused about all this.

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Default Apr 16, 2020 at 05:09 AM
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The meds may be working because I am being less difficult. I’m more bland. I’m locked in with my family, so, of course, I am intentionally being my nicest so we all get along and don’t crack up. I might have been acting this way without any meds. I wish I wasn’t so confused about all this.
After more time goes by, you might have a better handle on how much of your behavior is because of your meds verses how much comes from your choice to be as kind to your loved ones as you can be.

One of my medications (sertraline/zoloft) definitely numbs my emotions. At the time it was prescribed, it was exactly what I needed because I was so devasted by the events that were occurring. Currently, I feel am learning to detach from other's negative emotions without it. However, when one of my children first returned home, I took the full dose for a while because I was anxious that there would be dischord similiar to what had happened before. This has not happened and if it does, I feel like I will am now better able to not become emotionally entangled in a situation that I am not responsible for. So I do not always take the medication now and am evaluating if I need it anymore. Yes, it makes me more logical and less emotional but it also makes me less passionate about life. Life is kind of flat and boring without passion so if I can be kind and have enough control of my impulses without it then I would rather not be on it. However, when I was prescribed it, I had made some very bad events (I did not instigate these events but was shocked and panicked as they happened) even worse; so, at the time, it was what I needed. When it comes to medications, the tough part is that some of them are addictive (fortunately, I don't feel like the Sertraline is that addictive) so when we feel like we don't need them anymore, it can be hard to get off of them but I think it is important to try what the psychiatrist suggests if we are in a crisis but also self evaluate and never feel like we have to take something that we know we don't want. Hopefully, with time, you will be able to better evaluate how your meds are effecting you and if it is right for you. Never relinquish your right to choose what is best for your body, mind and spirit.

I thought this video was interesting (YouTube). Sometimes I think one family member want to talk about issues that others in the family aren't ready to deal with. We can honestly say what we see to be the problem but if others truly can't see it or are defensive or deflect by blaming the messenger then sometimes detachment and trying to be a good example is all we can do. Not that anyone is blameless (we are only human) but we are all at different points in our spiritual journeys IMO.

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Default Apr 16, 2020 at 02:47 PM
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The meds may be working because I am being less difficult. I’m more bland. I’m locked in with my family, so, of course, I am intentionally being my nicest so we all get along and don’t crack up. I might have been acting this way without any meds. I wish I wasn’t so confused about all this.
I agree, you do have to "work with" your meds. I found that to be true for me. When i first started on my meds, i was still going out for dinner and drinks with a gf, who was also a counselor, and at the end of the night she would be like, "i think youre on the wrong meds or you have the wrong dx, look at you, youre all riled up, maybe even worse than before." I finally figure out maybe i shouldnt be going out with someone who would ply me with drinks and sodium(!) and rile me up talking about things i couldnt change. The calmer i stay, the more sleep and exercise i get, the more regular my meals, the better ALL my meds work, and the less overwhelmed and hopeless i feel. Im almost even hopeful and optimistic.

P.s. it definitely helps that one old lady died, and another isnt bothering me anymore, and the third is teachable!
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Default Apr 16, 2020 at 04:17 PM
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I agree, you do have to "work with" your meds. I found that to be true for me. When i first started on my meds, i was still going out for dinner and drinks with a gf, who was also a counselor, and at the end of the night she would be like, "i think youre on the wrong meds or you have the wrong dx, look at you, youre all riled up, maybe even worse than before." I finally figure out maybe i shouldnt be going out with someone who would ply me with drinks and sodium(!) and rile me up talking about things i couldnt change. The calmer i stay, the more sleep and exercise i get, the more regular my meals, the better ALL my meds work, and the less overwhelmed and hopeless i feel. Im almost even hopeful and optimistic.

P.s. it definitely helps that one old lady died, and another isnt bothering me anymore, and the third is teachable!
What’s wrong with being lively and vocal about something you are passionate about, especially when liquored and salted up? I find you hilarious and wouldn’t want to bland you down and stifle your personality.

There’s an element with me regarding that, too. I can be very animated. I think I’m funny. My husband is unbelievably unshakable. Maybe he doesn’t like that side of me. Am I better off losing myself to be what others prefer?

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Default Apr 16, 2020 at 04:26 PM
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What’s wrong with being lively and vocal about something you are passionate about, especially when liquored and salted up? I find you hilarious and wouldn’t want to bland you down and stifle your personality.

There’s an element with me regarding that, too. I can be very animated. I think I’m funny. My husband is unbelievably unshakable. Maybe he doesn’t like that side of me. Am I better off losing myself to be what others prefer?
Except it didnt feel good to me. It wasnt what i wanted to talk about. I lost myself a long time ago - majorly on my 16th birthday, but there were a lot of other turning-away points. I still think im funny, and i still value that part of myself. But geez i was practically assaulting people in elevators (with my "humor") because i felt i had a captive audience - so i was REALLY bad with boundaries. In my defense, i was bad with boundaries because mine were not respected. I had to learn them. Now i am learning to define what exactly myself is within those boundaries. I need to color in these lines.
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Default Apr 16, 2020 at 04:38 PM
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Except it didnt feel good to me. It wasnt what i wanted to talk about. I lost myself a long time ago - majorly on my 16th birthday, but there were a lot of other turning-away points. I still think im funny, and i still value that part of myself. But geez i was practically assaulting people in elevators (with my "humor") because i felt i had a captive audience - so i was REALLY bad with boundaries. In my defense, i was bad with boundaries because mine were not respected. I had to learn them. Now i am learning to define what exactly myself is within those boundaries. I need to color in these lines.
That sounds like the personality of my former friend. She was Rodney Dangerfield. She would say the most outrageous things to strangers. Her ex bf told her, if she was a guy, she’d get punched all the time due to the behavior she had toward people.

You are aware and made changes. She had no interest in that. She told me she refuses to censor herself and ‘walk on eggshells’ in order to respect any boundaries with me.

I’m sorry so much happened to you, even at such a young age, and I am aware of your family.

I think these meds I’m on are allowing me to not get upset to things that are upsetting and have been my issue for a long time. The issue is not getting better, but my reaction is. I am just more calm and dull toward it, accepting. If that’s what these meds are doing, then that’s good enough reason to take them.

After reflecting on all the issues I’ve had with people; it was issues with them and it was my emotional lability that caused me to take it to heart.

I’m only going to tell this psy I feel good and I’m not going to do any more talk therapy. I am just ‘fine’.

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Default Apr 16, 2020 at 05:07 PM
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I’d not take any meds in absence of proper diagnosis. It’s not uncommon for doctors or therapists suggest meds for all reasons or no reasons. No medication could cure marriage problems or other personal troubles. It might make yuh not care.

I had a therapist long time ago while in grad school. My issue was time management at the moment as I worked full time demanding professional job, was full time in grad school that I was trying to finish in a rush so I can get pay raise and I was single mom and my kid needed me. And I commuted to work and to uni opposite sides of the metro area.

I had ZERO time for anything. I had hard time keeping friendships and I was being asked out by men but had to say no because I had zero time for dates.

So I was complaining that I don’t have any time and it’s kind of sad I can’t have personal life or hang out with people for that reason. My question was on better time managing.

I guess the word “sad” woke this crazy t up.

She looked at me and asked if I liked some meds. I was like for what??? She said well you said you felt sad and some low dose might make you feel better. I to this day remember. I was like what are you talking about??? You want people to take meds because they are very busy and are sad they don’t have more free time?

I’d demand proper evaluation and diagnosis. They’d like everyone to take meds if they could.
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