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Anonymous33370
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Default Jun 07, 2007 at 10:22 PM
  #1
My t is going to be away for the whole of July and some of August. Even though I have supportive family and friends, the thought of her not being here is very daunting. In some ways, I think it might be a good time to end the whole therapy thing. If I can get through this time then perhaps I should just carry on. It's hard and I feel sick thinking about it. She did say we could e mail weekly, but I think I would feel guilty doing that (bothering her). It seems like such a long time to be not seeing her. How do you get through it?
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(JD)
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Default Jun 07, 2007 at 10:30 PM
  #2
NO no no...don't end therapy. These things happen... and the feelings you are feeling are normal (((hugs))) You would rather end the therapy rather than feel abandoned. It is good therapy to work through this with the T, in that, once you acknowledge all the feelings you are having about this absence (anger etc) and then have T return, well that's a good base to continue to build upon. It takes many times of feeling abandoned, working through those feelings so they diminish over time, and you begin to trust (T) and then they return.

You need to find things to do that replace or add to the therapy experience. Email is good and if your T has offered, take it. You can set it up and if you find you don't need it, then you won't have to ...but to have it there is good imo.

Journal, make special writings or pictures, collages whatever if you are artsy at all... Maybe schedule an activity each week that you would normally go to T. Take pictures of where you go and what you do, to tell about later. I suggest taking a holiday from therapy work. Leave therapy work to in office sessions. Use the time to do some things that need to be done around the house or on yourself that you put off because you're "bummed out" from therapy?

Good wishes. Of course, posting at PC helps too I'm dreading it!

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dreamrunner
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Default Jun 07, 2007 at 10:35 PM
  #3
I only get to see my t once a month(unless theres a crisis)
Ive found it really hard with those bad times in between sessions.
One suggestion is-make a list of stuff you would like to do or accomplish over the summer.That could be fun stuff or chores/jobs around your place./exersize plans/ etc.....Make time for a real holiday of some kind too......everyone needs a break away from the mundane.
I find journaling to help get through difficult time lapses in sessions as well.
Good luck,stay focused on staying healthy!

ps-If your T says you can e-mail her.....dont feel guilty. I'm dreading it!
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Default Jun 08, 2007 at 07:54 AM
  #4
I wish I could say there was an easy way round the breaks, but alas there isn't. Ive been with my T for almost 3years, twice wkly for 2of those yrs so the breaks really are a big thing for me as seeings someone as supportive as a T twice a week then to have go 7weeks each summer holiday and all the other breaks is hard.

Its in dealing with the pain this raises is where some of the healing comes from, and where we get to find out our own inner resources.

It takes time and practice, almost like a childs first steps, they fall then they get up again.

I guess thats why growing up is left to children, they have imaginations that destract them from the constant emotional tests that exist.

I can't sit down and play bricks to take my mind of missing T, but I'm learning to read a book, write about how I am feeling, reach out to others.

Its hard, but its worth it in the end.
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Default Jun 08, 2007 at 08:36 AM
  #5
I sometimes would plan my vacations around the time my T was going on vacation so I could be distracted with my own activities at that time. Anyone out of town you can visit for a week or so? Breaking up the "routine" of going to T helps me a little.

It's very hard. I wrote special journals and cards and mailed them to my T's office. My imagining her reading them when she "got back" helped. Maybe you can "schedule" a time or two when you'll e-mail her, tell her when to expect it and then it would be okay? You could think about what you would say and compose a little each day. My T once went away for nearly 3 months and I did a daily "lesson" I had learned that day, tried to get it into 1 sentence only, with the most important word or phrase bolded.

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