advertisement
Reply
Thread Tools Display Modes
Mopey
Magnate
 
Mopey's Avatar
Mopey remove
 
Member Since: Oct 2018
Location: California
Posts: 2,025
5 yr Member
1,520 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Apr 13, 2020 at 02:00 PM
  #581
Quote:
Originally Posted by Client xx View Post
Awesome idea, I didn't realise how vulnerable I was in therapy.... People need to know what's ethical


This is such an amazing, ongoing thread. Every now and then I feel the need to add my 2 cents.

The thing is, about, say, making a pamphlet available in all the offices, etc - I am not sure how a neophyte CAN be prepared for the fraught minefield that is therapy. Personally when I started out I had no clue. I just thought that I would go to the appointments, pay, and then one day magically be cured.

I had ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA of the effort that would be required from me personally, or the many many things that could go wrong, or how much this very one-sided, intense relationship could mess with my already very troubled mind. I thought they were supposed to help me, and that was it.

You can try to warn people, but I'm not sure that anything short of the actual experience can show you the desperate intensity of the whole thing. Probably the best you can do is try to prepare people to have reasonable expectations, if that is possible.......

__________________
Mopey is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
HD7970GHZ, SalingerEsme
 
Thanks for this!
HD7970GHZ, here today, Out There, precaryous, SalingerEsme

advertisement
here today
Grand Magnate
here today has no updates.
 
Member Since: Jun 2012
Location: USA
Posts: 3,515
10 yr Member
1,429 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Apr 14, 2020 at 09:48 AM
  #582
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mopey View Post
. . .
I had ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA of the effort that would be required from me personally, or the many many things that could go wrong, or how much this very one-sided, intense relationship could mess with my already very troubled mind. I thought they were supposed to help me, and that was it.
. . .
This ^^

How we can we do better in communicating this? It's apparently hard for people to accept, believe, understand, or think it's relevant to them if they haven't been through it.

And then, when things do go wrong -- what can people do about that? Individual clients themselves or maybe peer-support groups?
here today is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
HD7970GHZ, Out There
 
Thanks for this!
HD7970GHZ
Anonymous49675
Guest
Anonymous49675 has no updates. Edit
 
Posts: n/a
Default Apr 21, 2020 at 10:58 PM
  #583
Feeling really depressed and defeated.

I feel like my current T helped me see how unethical my previous therapist was and supported me as I made a complaint.

Now I feel she's almost down playing what happened as I come to realise how damaging it was.

I don't get it.

If she doesn't believe how bad it was, then how will the board
  Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
here today
Anonymous49675
Guest
Anonymous49675 has no updates. Edit
 
Posts: n/a
Default Apr 21, 2020 at 11:46 PM
  #584
I actually think the complaint process is in some ways just as devastating as bad therapy.

No wonder why so many crimes so unreported....

I am just going to let him worm his way out out of the wrong things he did, and pray that no one else gets hurt at his inability to sort his own damn issues.
  Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
here today, precaryous
here today
Grand Magnate
here today has no updates.
 
Member Since: Jun 2012
Location: USA
Posts: 3,515
10 yr Member
1,429 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Apr 22, 2020 at 10:16 AM
  #585
Quote:
Originally Posted by Client xx View Post
Feeling really depressed and defeated.

I feel like my current T helped me see how unethical my previous therapist was and supported me as I made a complaint.

Now I feel she's almost down playing what happened as I come to realise how damaging it was.

I don't get it.

If she doesn't believe how bad it was, then how will the board
You have done what you could do.

Your T supported you in doing that.

She bore witness -- somewhat, perhaps? -- to what happened to you.

For me, the devastation is/was real. Seeing/feeling that continues to be a struggle.

And then, what? I am devastated to my core, and then what? How and where and for what to move on, to grow, to . . .

Is it possible that something like that may be where your T is coming from? That she wants to try to help you get "past" this or something? They try but they don't know how bad and disabling it is because it hasn't happened to them.

It HAS happened to some others of us, though. And I support your attempt to get the word out. Eventually. . .well, I continue to have some hope. Who knows how long it will take.
here today is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
SalingerEsme
 
Thanks for this!
precaryous
Mopey
Magnate
 
Mopey's Avatar
Mopey remove
 
Member Since: Oct 2018
Location: California
Posts: 2,025
5 yr Member
1,520 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Apr 22, 2020 at 12:54 PM
  #586
Yes, and one thing they're very fond of telling us is that we must "get over it" and "move on". For some reason when I hear that it makes me very very angry

__________________
Mopey is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Thanks for this!
Quietmind 2, SalingerEsme, ttrim
sarahsweets
Threadtastic Postaholic
 
sarahsweets's Avatar
sarahsweets has no updates.
 
Member Since: Dec 2018
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 6,006 (SuperPoster!)
5 yr Member
192 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Apr 22, 2020 at 02:15 PM
  #587
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mopey View Post
Yes, and one thing they're very fond of telling us is that we must "get over it" and "move on". For some reason when I hear that it makes me very very angry

I find it ironic and funny in a sick way. A therapist telling you to move on and get over it yet their entire livelihood rests on people
That can’t get over it or move on.

__________________
"I carried a watermelon?"

President of the no F's given society.
sarahsweets is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
SalingerEsme
 
Thanks for this!
Quietmind 2, SalingerEsme
Anonymous49675
Guest
Anonymous49675 has no updates. Edit
 
Posts: n/a
Default Apr 22, 2020 at 02:19 PM
  #588
Thanks guys,

Yes she wants me to move on for sure and not stay stuck talking about it.

But how can I move on?

It has been 6 months since the complaint was filed and NO response from provider.

He was suppose to reply by January 20th then there were all these 'delays'. Both from the HDC and from the provider. Then finally they are blaming the virus. So incredibly frustrating
  Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
precaryous
precaryous
Inner Space Traveler
 
precaryous's Avatar
precaryous Line them up.
 
Member Since: May 2014
Location: on the wing of an eagle
Posts: 3,880
8 yr Member
8,141 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Apr 22, 2020 at 03:46 PM
  #589
The process, itself, is slow enough. Then the other side infamously initiates delaying tactics....such as returned official documents, insufficient or non existing addresses, lies, feigned illness, rescheduling, deceit, delay, delay.

The other side wants to wear us out and hopes we will quit.
precaryous is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Anonymous49675
Guest
Anonymous49675 has no updates. Edit
 
Posts: n/a
Default Apr 22, 2020 at 04:00 PM
  #590
I think you are so right pre,

I think he was hoping I would change my mind. Maybe I am just angry and will eventually calm down.

Probably playing the victim card. Poor t, tried so hard to help this dependant needy client and this is what he gets.....
  Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
precaryous
precaryous
Inner Space Traveler
 
precaryous's Avatar
precaryous Line them up.
 
Member Since: May 2014
Location: on the wing of an eagle
Posts: 3,880
8 yr Member
8,141 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Apr 22, 2020 at 05:25 PM
  #591
Quote:
Originally Posted by Client xx View Post
I actually think the complaint process is in some ways just as devastating as bad therapy.

No wonder why so many crimes so unreported....

I am just going to let him worm his way out out of the wrong things he did, and pray that no one else gets hurt at his inability to sort his own damn issues.
You might not even realize how bad and damaging it was/is while you are in the middle of the complaint(s).

I sure didn’t. We gain perspective as distance & time goes by..when we continue to have nightmares or dreams about them..when we find it difficult or impossible to feel almost ok -possibly, maybe, consulting a subsequent mental health care giver.....when TV programs give us flash backs, when we see the offender’s name in the news, or we see articles reporting on his success at chess, becoming a Master Gardener, or his bridge scores.

It took twenty years for me to think to ask, ‘What do I call the sexual assault that happened to me?’ ...It took twenty years for me to put together fragments of pieces of unanswered questions about why he did this or that....to gain some understanding. Some things I’ll never know.
It took years for me to find my anger.

We were exploited or harmed ...and we file a complaint..and some T’s think we should get over it? ‘Recovery’ or normalcy, or whatever, isn’t done until it’s done. Sometimes it’s never done.

Last edited by precaryous; Apr 22, 2020 at 09:22 PM..
precaryous is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
AllHeart
 
Thanks for this!
AllHeart, HD7970GHZ, Quietmind 2
HD7970GHZ
Grand Poohbah
 
HD7970GHZ's Avatar
HD7970GHZ "Primum Non Nocere"
 
Member Since: Sep 2013
Location: N/A
Posts: 1,776
10 yr Member
2,626 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Aug 25, 2020 at 01:23 AM
  #592
Sending warm hugs to all of those who have been harmed in therapy. You are not alone.

HD7970ghz

__________________
"stand for those who are forgotten - sacrifice for those who forget"
"roller coasters not only go up and down - they also go in circles"
"the point of therapy - is to get out of therapy"
"don't put all your eggs - in one basket"
"promote pleasure - prevent pain"
"with change - comes loss"
HD7970GHZ is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
AllHeart, Lostislost, Mopey, precaryous, SalingerEsme, SlumberKitty
 
Thanks for this!
Mopey, precaryous
All times are GMT -5. The time now is 04:46 AM.
Powered by vBulletin® — Copyright © 2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.



 

My Support Forums

My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.

 

Helplines and Lifelines

The material on this site is for informational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider.

Always consult your doctor or mental health professional before trying anything you read here.