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Magnate
Member Since Oct 2018
Location: California
Posts: 2,025
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#581
Quote:
This is such an amazing, ongoing thread. Every now and then I feel the need to add my 2 cents. The thing is, about, say, making a pamphlet available in all the offices, etc - I am not sure how a neophyte CAN be prepared for the fraught minefield that is therapy. Personally when I started out I had no clue. I just thought that I would go to the appointments, pay, and then one day magically be cured. I had ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA of the effort that would be required from me personally, or the many many things that could go wrong, or how much this very one-sided, intense relationship could mess with my already very troubled mind. I thought they were supposed to help me, and that was it. You can try to warn people, but I'm not sure that anything short of the actual experience can show you the desperate intensity of the whole thing. Probably the best you can do is try to prepare people to have reasonable expectations, if that is possible....... __________________ |
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HD7970GHZ, SalingerEsme
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HD7970GHZ, here today, Out There, precaryous, SalingerEsme
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Jun 2012
Location: USA
Posts: 3,515
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#582
Quote:
How we can we do better in communicating this? It's apparently hard for people to accept, believe, understand, or think it's relevant to them if they haven't been through it. And then, when things do go wrong -- what can people do about that? Individual clients themselves or maybe peer-support groups? |
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HD7970GHZ, Out There
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HD7970GHZ
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#583
Feeling really depressed and defeated.
I feel like my current T helped me see how unethical my previous therapist was and supported me as I made a complaint. Now I feel she's almost down playing what happened as I come to realise how damaging it was. I don't get it. If she doesn't believe how bad it was, then how will the board |
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here today
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#584
I actually think the complaint process is in some ways just as devastating as bad therapy.
No wonder why so many crimes so unreported.... I am just going to let him worm his way out out of the wrong things he did, and pray that no one else gets hurt at his inability to sort his own damn issues. |
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here today, precaryous
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Jun 2012
Location: USA
Posts: 3,515
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#585
Quote:
Your T supported you in doing that. She bore witness -- somewhat, perhaps? -- to what happened to you. For me, the devastation is/was real. Seeing/feeling that continues to be a struggle. And then, what? I am devastated to my core, and then what? How and where and for what to move on, to grow, to . . . Is it possible that something like that may be where your T is coming from? That she wants to try to help you get "past" this or something? They try but they don't know how bad and disabling it is because it hasn't happened to them. It HAS happened to some others of us, though. And I support your attempt to get the word out. Eventually. . .well, I continue to have some hope. Who knows how long it will take. |
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SalingerEsme
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precaryous
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Magnate
Member Since Oct 2018
Location: California
Posts: 2,025
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#586
Yes, and one thing they're very fond of telling us is that we must "get over it" and "move on". For some reason when I hear that it makes me very very angry
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Quietmind 2, SalingerEsme, ttrim
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Threadtastic Postaholic
Member Since Dec 2018
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 6,006
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#587
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I find it ironic and funny in a sick way. A therapist telling you to move on and get over it yet their entire livelihood rests on people That can’t get over it or move on. __________________ "I carried a watermelon?" President of the no F's given society. |
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SalingerEsme
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Quietmind 2, SalingerEsme
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#588
Thanks guys,
Yes she wants me to move on for sure and not stay stuck talking about it. But how can I move on? It has been 6 months since the complaint was filed and NO response from provider. He was suppose to reply by January 20th then there were all these 'delays'. Both from the HDC and from the provider. Then finally they are blaming the virus. So incredibly frustrating |
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precaryous
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Inner Space Traveler
Member Since May 2014
Location: on the wing of an eagle
Posts: 3,880
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#589
The process, itself, is slow enough. Then the other side infamously initiates delaying tactics....such as returned official documents, insufficient or non existing addresses, lies, feigned illness, rescheduling, deceit, delay, delay.
The other side wants to wear us out and hopes we will quit. |
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#590
I think you are so right pre,
I think he was hoping I would change my mind. Maybe I am just angry and will eventually calm down. Probably playing the victim card. Poor t, tried so hard to help this dependant needy client and this is what he gets..... |
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precaryous
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Inner Space Traveler
Member Since May 2014
Location: on the wing of an eagle
Posts: 3,880
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#591
Quote:
I sure didn’t. We gain perspective as distance & time goes by..when we continue to have nightmares or dreams about them..when we find it difficult or impossible to feel almost ok -possibly, maybe, consulting a subsequent mental health care giver.....when TV programs give us flash backs, when we see the offender’s name in the news, or we see articles reporting on his success at chess, becoming a Master Gardener, or his bridge scores. It took twenty years for me to think to ask, ‘What do I call the sexual assault that happened to me?’ ...It took twenty years for me to put together fragments of pieces of unanswered questions about why he did this or that....to gain some understanding. Some things I’ll never know. It took years for me to find my anger. We were exploited or harmed ...and we file a complaint..and some T’s think we should get over it? ‘Recovery’ or normalcy, or whatever, isn’t done until it’s done. Sometimes it’s never done. Last edited by precaryous; Apr 22, 2020 at 09:22 PM.. |
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AllHeart
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AllHeart, HD7970GHZ, Quietmind 2
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Grand Poohbah
Member Since Sep 2013
Location: N/A
Posts: 1,776
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#592
Sending warm hugs to all of those who have been harmed in therapy. You are not alone.
HD7970ghz __________________ "stand for those who are forgotten - sacrifice for those who forget" "roller coasters not only go up and down - they also go in circles" "the point of therapy - is to get out of therapy" "don't put all your eggs - in one basket" "promote pleasure - prevent pain" "with change - comes loss" |
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AllHeart, Lostislost, Mopey, precaryous, SalingerEsme, SlumberKitty
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Mopey, precaryous
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