Dear T:I Really Need to Tell you Something... Part XXXVII

Lemoncake · Dec 13, 2018 at 01:10 PM

Thanks for being MY T.

Love

Your biggest headache.

S

LonesomeTonight · Dec 13, 2018 at 01:18 PM

Dear T,
That helped. Thank you.
Love,
LT

LonesomeTonight · Dec 13, 2018 at 01:39 PM

Dear T,
Also, I was right about that QB playing for our local team at one point! Not at the time you were talking about, but close! (I want to email you about that but it's really random, so I'll hold it till Monday. And I found the name of the guy we were referencing.)

Love,
LT

lucozader · Dec 13, 2018 at 02:32 PM

oh sweet, sweet dark-haired man
oh see, see what I am
and take me, take me, take me anyway
please take me, take me, take me anyway

Echos Myron redux · Dec 13, 2018 at 03:17 PM

I'm in love with you. I just want to say that to you over and over like I say it in my head.

Anastasia~ · Dec 13, 2018 at 04:01 PM

T,
When I went home after Tuesday's session, I really felt horrible, I felt like I was pressuring you to write the note. I felt like a horrible person because of it. I almost texted you, but before I did that, I decided to be curious about how I felt. I then discovered that there was a reason that I wanted you to to remove me from the situation. After that, I didn't even think of texting you because I knew that what I was experiencing was real, and that my feelings were valid given my past history. So, I didn't feel shame because of how I felt because it made sense. I realized I was feeling invalidated (emotionally) although intellectually, I was at a different point. I just wanted to tell you this.

me

LostOnTheTrail · Dec 13, 2018 at 04:44 PM

I'm saving your Christmas card to open, probably next week at our usual session time. I am beyond grateful to you for writing the note, even though I couldn't look you in the eye as I asked you.

Grateful that we scheduled for those couple of weeks in January. Who knows what the anniversary will bring this year? Maybe I'll get to touch some of that anger.

And I feel like crap for emailing you about the article, but...I hope you enjoy it.

Lrad123 · Dec 13, 2018 at 05:07 PM

I wish I had an appointment with you tomorrow so I could skip it. I’m willing to talk about it, but you have chosen not to reply to emails so I feel stuck. I’m feeling really upset, and I know I might not feel this way next Wednesday which upsets me. You helped create this, then you leave me alone to deal with it. So yeah, F you.

Dec 13, 2018 at 07:01 PM

awwww t, thanks for the nice response earlier. it warmed my heart. right now at this very moment that I am typing this, you would have been opening your door for me. This, my first post-therapy Thursday. I am doing better than okay. That's how I know that we absolutely did the right thing last week.

Lemoncake · Dec 13, 2018 at 08:23 PM

I finally got an email update for delivery regarding the last book "how the grinch stole Christmas". It was supposed to all arrive together, but it didn't. I know this isn't true- but I have this voice in my head saying you'll get sick of the interruption of having three separate deliveries this week and me invading your personal time.

P.s even though it's still 2.24am and I'm waiting to go gym, I'm still relatively okay.

P.P.s 4 days till my stomatology exam.

piggy momma · Dec 13, 2018 at 11:03 PM

I have been so happy with our sessions lately. I kind of feel like we've turned a corner. I hope things stay this good.

annielovesbacon · Dec 14, 2018 at 12:22 AM

I wish I was allowed to email you... sometimes I desperately need help, but sometimes I see something that makes me think of you and I'd hope it would make you smile. Like when my school's basketball team beats your school's basketball team. I wish I could send you a jokingly taunting email. I know you would laugh.

LabRat27 · Dec 14, 2018 at 01:47 AM

When you're happy for me because I'm making progress it makes me want to sabotage everything

Echos Myron redux · Dec 14, 2018 at 03:02 AM

Yay you're doing some stuff online next year! Extra Teeeeee for Freeeeeeee.

Dec 14, 2018 at 03:03 AM

There can only be me. Only. Me.

Lemoncake · Dec 14, 2018 at 04:35 AM

Quote:

"'Cause I am one step heavy and two steps high
Hold it steady with you by my side"

Congrats T you made to two years.

Anastasia~ · Dec 14, 2018 at 05:25 AM

I'm so tired of being me. I am tired of having to fight each day to work. I'm afraid of my possible new diagnosis. I am just so exhausted just trying to be a human. I don't have a stable mind to rely on. I just want to give up right now. I feel like waiving a white flag. I don't even know what giving up means or entails, I just don't want to be me anymore. "me" is unreliable. I have little motivation and even less energy. I just want to stay in bed all day and pretend that I am a human even though I'm not. I am afraid of being me. This depression is not going well.

lucozader · Dec 14, 2018 at 12:32 PM

R, I'm so glad you still exist. Thank you.

Lrad123 · Dec 14, 2018 at 12:38 PM

I’m angry and I don’t know why, but you’re definitely mixed up in the middle of it all whether or not you deserve to be.

SlumberKitty · Dec 14, 2018 at 01:13 PM

Dear Former T, I mailed you a handmade Christmas card today...even though you aren't my T anymore, I gave you one every year. I wonder if you thought it wasn't going to come this year? No way I could forget you. I hope you like it. It's not as intricate as some of the other ones, but it's from the heart. Kit.

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Dear T:I Really Need to Tell you Something... Part XXXVII

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Lemoncake Luna's offical mini me. Member Since May 2017 Location: Cafe Nervosa. Posts: 9,698 (SuperPoster!) 6 10.2k hugs given	Dec 13, 2018 at 01:10 PM #101 Thanks for being MY T. Love Your biggest headache. S __________________ "Love, like life, flows Through the heart. Feel the thrill of the flow And say nothing."

LonesomeTonight Always in This Twilight Member Since Feb 2015 Location: US Posts: 20,744 (SuperPoster!) 9 74.9k hugs given	Dec 13, 2018 at 01:18 PM #102 Dear T, That helped. Thank you. Love, LT

LonesomeTonight Always in This Twilight Member Since Feb 2015 Location: US Posts: 20,744 (SuperPoster!) 9 74.9k hugs given	Dec 13, 2018 at 01:39 PM #103 Dear T, Also, I was right about that QB playing for our local team at one point! Not at the time you were talking about, but close! (I want to email you about that but it's really random, so I'll hold it till Monday. And I found the name of the guy we were referencing.) Love, LT

lucozader Most Dangerous Member Since Feb 2017 Location: UK Posts: 2,920 7 7,642 hugs given	Dec 13, 2018 at 02:32 PM #104 oh sweet, sweet dark-haired man oh see, see what I am and take me, take me, take me anyway please take me, take me, take me anyway

Echos Myron redux Magnate Member Since Apr 2018 Location: UK Posts: 2,160 6 1,833 hugs given	Dec 13, 2018 at 03:17 PM #105 I'm in love with you. I just want to say that to you over and over like I say it in my head.

Lrad123 Poohbah Member Since Nov 2017 Location: United States Posts: 1,332 6 372 hugs given	Dec 13, 2018 at 05:07 PM #108 I wish I had an appointment with you tomorrow so I could skip it. I’m willing to talk about it, but you have chosen not to reply to emails so I feel stuck. I’m feeling really upset, and I know I might not feel this way next Wednesday which upsets me. You helped create this, then you leave me alone to deal with it. So yeah, F you.

Anonymous43207 Guest Posts: n/a	Dec 13, 2018 at 07:01 PM #109 awwww t, thanks for the nice response earlier. it warmed my heart. right now at this very moment that I am typing this, you would have been opening your door for me. This, my first post-therapy Thursday. I am doing better than okay. That's how I know that we absolutely did the right thing last week.

piggy momma Poohbah Member Since Oct 2018 Location: Canada Posts: 1,073 5 70 hugs given	Dec 13, 2018 at 11:03 PM #111 I have been so happy with our sessions lately. I kind of feel like we've turned a corner. I hope things stay this good.

LabRat27 Poohbah Member Since Mar 2018 Location: CA Posts: 1,009 6 2,354 hugs given	Dec 14, 2018 at 01:47 AM #113 When you're happy for me because I'm making progress it makes me want to sabotage everything

Echos Myron redux Magnate Member Since Apr 2018 Location: UK Posts: 2,160 6 1,833 hugs given	Dec 14, 2018 at 03:02 AM #114 Yay you're doing some stuff online next year! Extra Teeeeee for Freeeeeeee.

Anonymous42961 Guest Posts: n/a	Dec 14, 2018 at 03:03 AM #115 There can only be me. Only. Me.

lucozader Most Dangerous Member Since Feb 2017 Location: UK Posts: 2,920 7 7,642 hugs given	Dec 14, 2018 at 12:32 PM #118 R, I'm so glad you still exist. Thank you.

Lrad123 Poohbah Member Since Nov 2017 Location: United States Posts: 1,332 6 372 hugs given	Dec 14, 2018 at 12:38 PM #119 I’m angry and I don’t know why, but you’re definitely mixed up in the middle of it all whether or not you deserve to be.

SlumberKitty Legendary Wise Elder Member Since Jul 2018 Location: CA Posts: 27,329 (SuperPoster!) 5 117.7k hugs given	Dec 14, 2018 at 01:13 PM #120 Dear Former T, I mailed you a handmade Christmas card today...even though you aren't my T anymore, I gave you one every year. I wonder if you thought it wasn't going to come this year? No way I could forget you. I hope you like it. It's not as intricate as some of the other ones, but it's from the heart. Kit.