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Member Since Mar 2018
Location: England
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#1
Has anyone else's therapist ever gone out of their way, to ensure you receive the best of care? Well, yesterday was my last session, with my therapist. It was a good, mutual decision. So, anyways, I'm having some health issues. I was talking about them in session. My therapist encouraged me to go and get checked out....taking me to a+e personally (she knows I don't drive!) .... and making herself late for her next client. I'm so touched, by generosity. She even contacted me last night, to ask how it went. I had to share experience
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Anonymous45127, guilloche, precaryous, SalingerEsme, SlumberKitty, Taylor27
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Poohbah
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#2
That's amazing. How kind of her to do that!!
I don't have any experiences nearly as good as that, but I have to say that my therapist is pretty good to me overall. I'm very grateful to have him. |
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#3
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Anonymous45127, feileacan, lucozader, Miss P
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#4
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#5
What was he going above and beyond if not the expectations of his role? By definition that is a boundary breach. I can understand that you don't consider his actions to have been at your expense, but you don't know that it wasn't at the expense of his or others. Of course, that is not your responsibility to consider, it is his and another reason why fulfilling the role and no more is important.
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Poohbah
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#6
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When you're in the helping professions, sometimes there are emergencies. I don't see any boundaries crossed here. |
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Anonymous45127, Loco4, Miss P, precaryous
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#7
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He also came in to see me the day after my father died. He died on a Friday night and he offered to come in on the Saturday morning. Again, at no one's expense. In my opinion, these weren't required of him, hence above and beyond. And I'm grateful. I'd probably be dead if he hadn't seen me on the first instance above. |
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#8
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feileacan, Miss P
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#9
I would guess that going above and beyond can sit anywhere on that spectrum of boundary crossings, from being harmful to no-one to being harmful to many. I would also guess that many "going above and beyond" incidences are not at either extreme of the spectrum but fall somewhere in the middle.
I for sure know that as a client although I "understand" when the therapist is running late because of an emergency with someone else it does not lessen the harm it causes to me when I am also struggling to "hold on". |
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#10
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I will dip out now because this boundary stuff makes me angry. |
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feileacan, Miss P
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#11
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Magnate
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#12
I would never do this as a therapist. Sorry, but that was a bad decision on your therapist's part.
First of all, it was not a medical emergency. You have some health issues and you got a recommendation from her to see a specific doctor, that's fine. But there was no need to do it exactly on that day and there was certainly no need for her to take you there. I understand that you don't drive, but you manage your life somehow. I assume, there had never been a need for her to give you a ride before. So why now after the last session? And, it's completely unacceptable to do this kind of a favor to a client at the expense of another client. If that client knows the real reason why your therapist was late for that session, they have every right to be upset and angry about it. Also, the last session should have some sense of closure. It's the time to say good bye, basically. Taking a client to some doctor's office and then calling them to ask how it went doesn't create a sense of closure IMO. Sorry, if this feels like a cold shower. I understand your excitement and I am not blaming you for feeling how you feel. It does feel fantastic to be cared for in such a way by a therapist, so there is nothing wrong with how you feel. But your therapist should've handled the last session differently. She crossed the boundary. Not every boundary crossing is necessarily unethical, and this one was not, but it was definitely a bad judgment. Last edited by Ididitmyway; Dec 12, 2018 at 04:21 AM.. |
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#13
How do you know it was at the expense of another client!?
I have no idea when T sees other clients. But I agree with sorry oozit, At the expense of another client isn't professional. My T has in the past offered to accompany me to a Dr. But she would have done it in her own time. I'm sure your pretty excited at the attention. But it's sad it's at another's expense. Sounds like sibling rivalry being played out. |
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Grand Poohbah
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#14
That is a lovely way for your therapist to say a healing goodbye, and to show she really cares about you.
__________________ Living things don’t all require/ light in the same degree. Louise Gluck |
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#15
Many times he did, I truly believed I mattered to him... but now that he's leaving, I'm re-thinking everything. I can't help but see it all as only out of pity.
__________________ Grief is the price you pay for love. |
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#16
yes many times...
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#17
the biggest ones for me was when he drove me 1.5 hours to a large city to sit with me during my lawsuit mediation all day. (the lawsuit against my former t)
and then flying with me to another state in NE USA for a 4 day Hearing Voices group facilitator training __________________ |
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#18
I don't see this much different from the other client's perspective than a T going over session time with one client and then starting the next late. And at least what the T did was useful to OP. I would see repetitive above and beyond behavior worrisome but one time, in a crisis situation? Personally, if I were the next client and knew why the T was late, I would completely understand and would not be upset at all. If the T was late regularly, then I would be frustrated for not respecting my time.
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#19
OP—I am glad you had a good closure session and feel at peace.
__________________ The secret to eternal youth is arrested development.—Alice Roosevelt Longworth |
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#20
OP, I'm glad that your T showed care for you.
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