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Old 01-10-2019, 01:31 PM #11
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Default Re: IFS

Correct, mine is not DID either. And I do think it looks different for each person. What I describe is how it was/is experienced by me and for me. I think it might present to me this way because these ages are when I had my biggest issues growing up and I believe where I have developmental gaps. And maybe it looks this way to me because it is the way that I was able to accept and work with the concept.

Here is one book that describes a different way of looking at it: https://www.amazon.com/Parts-Work-Il.../dp/0979889715

From what I gather one of the advantages of seeing this type of internal landscape and dialog as separate parts from the self is that it might help one separate out threads of thoughts and to look at them from a sort of outside perspective. This might enable one to link things together, find patterns, see when or what causes them to appear or get louder, which ones are helpful, which ones are not so helpful... and so on.
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Old 01-11-2019, 05:56 AM #12
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Thanks for this thread everyone who posted.
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Old 01-11-2019, 05:08 PM #13
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Default Re: IFS

Derek Scott makes a number of informative vid on YouTube check him out
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Old 02-15-2019, 10:32 PM #14
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Default Re: IFS

I have been studying IFS lately and it sounds fascinating. I have not yet taken the blunge in getting a therapist but I have been exploring. I have tried to run through IFS on my own. I notice they always warn not to be blended with a part, stay in Self. But if you are not in the part, how can the part answer the question you ask? I ask a question from Self. And I don't feel the part enough to come up with am answer.

Anyway, I am a big fan of parts therapies- Resource Therapy, Big Mind, etc.
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Old 02-16-2019, 05:39 PM #15
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Just wondering how people’s Ts talk to their child parts. Basically, what that interaction looks like, and whether people’s Ts comfort their child parts and what that looks like.
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Old 02-16-2019, 05:56 PM #16
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Default Re: IFS

EMDR T and I are just starting to explore IFS. Ther eay she explained it to me is it ok isn't DID. She that sometimes I say things like "a part of me wants to do x but I know I can't because of y". I have said a few times when needing reassurance " "I feel like a child but I am not" she said those are the parts she is talking about. My parts work well together. My problem is that my protector part has been so good at protecting my child part from feelings and emotions that it is becoming an issue.
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Old 02-16-2019, 08:16 PM #17
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Default Re: IFS

I have DID and my T uses a blend of IFS and structural dissociation theory as a lens to view my alters/parts and I. Thinking about the alters as an internal family system works for DID just as it does in non-DID. Everybody has parts of themselves, aspects of themselves that operate in certain situations. Everybody has defense mechanisms that can be conceptualized as being held by protector parts. Every one has the ability to be playful and silly, which can be conceptualized as child parts. Everyone has a range of different aspects of self, each which might be appropriate in one situation but not in another. (Think playful silly self inappropriate in a professional work meeting).


When a child is traumatized the traumatized self states might remain more separate and distinct from each other so the whole person can avoid the conflict and pain held by trauma memories. That separateness can exist on a really wide scale from almost normal self-integration to completely separate autonomous DID alters. The beauty of IFS is that it isn't even necessary to define where on that spectrum the self states fall. You can use it to treat the whole self regardless of the extent of the separation, and know that the self states are perfectly normal aspects of all human beings.


Someone asked about T comforting child states - My T never, ever comforts my child alters. She consistently without fail calls on my compassionate adult alter to do that. Why? It is useless to my healing if we are dependent on her for self-regulation. It is imperative we learn to do that ourselves. If a disregulated child part is out in therapy our T will use all the tricks we have to ground an adult part in the present and then do sets of eye movements (EMDR) to get the most compassionate adult part to soothe and protect the child. She insists we are consistently able to do this before we do any trauma processing.

We can't yet. Nearly there though.
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