advertisement
Closed Thread
Thread Tools Display Modes
LonesomeTonight
Always in This Twilight
 
LonesomeTonight's Avatar
LonesomeTonight has no updates.
 
Member Since: Feb 2015
Location: US
Posts: 20,699 (SuperPoster!)
8 yr Member
74.8k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Feb 16, 2019 at 02:22 PM
  #681
Dear T,
Hope you reach (reached?) your destination safely today...wherever it is you're going.

Love,
LT
LonesomeTonight is online now  
 
Hugs from:
SlumberKitty
 
Thanks for this!
DP_2017

advertisement
WarmFuzzySocks
Magnet
 
WarmFuzzySocks's Avatar
WarmFuzzySocks is made of star stuff
 
Member Since: Jun 2017
Location: in the garden
Posts: 2,304
5 yr Member
15.5k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Feb 16, 2019 at 02:36 PM
  #682
I keep rolling this around in my head:
At home, I am consciously, constantly keeping these things in mind when I communicate: Keep it short, keep it clear, keep it concrete.

Sometimes when I am talking to you about the decisions I am making, you react as though I am waffling, not clear. Whatever, you can think that. I know where I'm going.

Last I saw you, you repeated back to me what I'd actually said to you, clarifying something. At the time, we were focused on the content of the conversation, but later I realized suddenly--Ooooooohhh!--that the language I use when summarizing my thoughts and conversations is much more ambiguous, ambivalent even, than I use anywhere outside therapy. I wonder why that is?

__________________
Since you cannot do good to all, you are to pay special attention to those who, by accidents of time, or place, or circumstance, are brought into closer connection with you. (St. Augustine)
WarmFuzzySocks is offline  
 
Hugs from:
Anastasia~, SlumberKitty, unaluna
 
Thanks for this!
LonesomeTonight
winterblues17
Member
winterblues17 has no updates.
 
Member Since: Nov 2017
Location: UK
Posts: 379
5 yr Member
62 hugs
given
Default Feb 16, 2019 at 02:46 PM
  #683
Old T, ex T or whatever else I can call you... today I really thought about it all, I don't care what excuse you had to leave me last month when we were actually working towards this months event! Anyway whatever the excuse u want to use, u know what, it's just not good enough. Actions speak louder than your words, and I stupidly believes over 2 years that you cared. Anyway time to stop caring about you, you don't deserve it, you suck!!!
winterblues17 is offline  
 
Hugs from:
LonesomeTonight, SlumberKitty
 
Thanks for this!
DP_2017
DP_2017
Grand Magnate
 
DP_2017's Avatar
DP_2017 has no updates.
 
Member Since: Aug 2017
Location: A house
Posts: 4,412
5 yr Member
665 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Feb 16, 2019 at 04:52 PM
  #684
I wish we could talk during recovery, I regret cancelling my original appointment or you would have been there for me. I keep wanting to text you funny things I don't think I'll ever be ok with not being allowed to talk to you anymore.

I miss you, I hope you are happy.

__________________
Grief is the price you pay for love.
DP_2017 is offline  
 
Hugs from:
LonesomeTonight, RaineD, SlumberKitty
Taylor27
healing from trauma
 
Taylor27's Avatar
Taylor27 has no updates.
 
Member Since: Dec 2017
Location: Alberta
Posts: 30,425 (SuperPoster!)
5 yr Member
24.3k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Feb 16, 2019 at 05:25 PM
  #685
Dear t I hope when i see you in a week and half you will have some good news about me seeing a new t after you retire. I feel i have more work to do on myself that requires therapy still.
Taylor27 is offline  
 
Hugs from:
LonesomeTonight, SlumberKitty
RaineD
Grand Member
RaineD has no updates.
 
Member Since: Aug 2017
Location: United States
Posts: 950
5 yr Member
962 hugs
given
Default Feb 17, 2019 at 04:55 AM
  #686
I'm feeling hopeless about ever being able to find another therapist. Maybe I should just give up.
RaineD is offline  
 
Hugs from:
SlumberKitty, unaluna
RaineD
Grand Member
RaineD has no updates.
 
Member Since: Aug 2017
Location: United States
Posts: 950
5 yr Member
962 hugs
given
Default Feb 17, 2019 at 05:44 AM
  #687
I love you, and I miss you so much.
RaineD is offline  
 
Hugs from:
SlumberKitty
Anne2.0
Grand Magnate
Anne2.0 elephant walks on
 
Member Since: Aug 2012
Location: Anonymous
Posts: 3,132
10 yr Member
129 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Feb 17, 2019 at 06:17 AM
  #688
Dear T:

Contemplative this morning, looking forward to my day. Feel secure in a way I haven't for a bit now. Writing this down and imagining you can read it but knowing you can't gives me a little fit of giggles, like I'm putting a blanket over my head. I wonder if you'd be surprised at some of my tender feelings for you in these moments.
Anne2.0 is offline  
 
Hugs from:
SlumberKitty, unaluna
Echos Myron redux
Magnate
Echos Myron redux is vaccinated
 
Member Since: Apr 2018
Location: UK
Posts: 2,157
5 yr Member
1,833 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Feb 17, 2019 at 07:09 AM
  #689
I MISS you. (Yes it's Sunday again - official I miss T day)
Echos Myron redux is offline  
 
Hugs from:
ElectricManatee, SlumberKitty
Anonymous43207
Guest
Anonymous43207 has no updates. Edit
 
Posts: n/a
Default Feb 17, 2019 at 07:20 AM
  #690
I'm a little confused at my feelings after Thursday's session. It's like... I dunno.
 
 
Hugs from:
SlumberKitty
nottrustin
Grand Magnate
 
nottrustin's Avatar
nottrustin has no updates.
 
Member Since: Jan 2014
Location: n/a
Posts: 4,819
10 yr Member
375 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Feb 17, 2019 at 07:44 AM
  #691
Thank you, for the first time in a long time I feel optimistic. I do believe I can get to a place where my past no longer haunts me. I know it will be a lot of work but think we can do it. Just continue to be patient with me.

__________________

nottrustin is offline  
 
Hugs from:
Anastasia~, SlumberKitty
LostOnTheTrail
Tweaky Dog
 
LostOnTheTrail's Avatar
LostOnTheTrail has no updates.
 
Member Since: Aug 2011
Location: England
Posts: 4,777
10 yr Member
3,105 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Feb 17, 2019 at 07:50 AM
  #692
It's so hard to hold on to things going well, when things fall apart again on a regular basis.

__________________
'Somewhere up above the great divide
Where the sky is wide, and the clouds are few
A man can see his way clear to the light
Just hold on tight, that's all you gotta do...'

Steve Earle - Fort Worth Blues

'You have all the grace you need for today, and today is all that matters.' - Steve Austin
LostOnTheTrail is offline  
 
Hugs from:
LonesomeTonight, SlumberKitty
nottrustin
Grand Magnate
 
nottrustin's Avatar
nottrustin has no updates.
 
Member Since: Jan 2014
Location: n/a
Posts: 4,819
10 yr Member
375 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Feb 17, 2019 at 08:00 AM
  #693
Quote:
Originally Posted by LostOnTheTrail View Post
It's so hard to hold on to things going well, when things fall apart again on a regular basis.
That is so true.

__________________

nottrustin is offline  
 
Hugs from:
SlumberKitty
 
Thanks for this!
Anastasia~
LonesomeTonight
Always in This Twilight
 
LonesomeTonight's Avatar
LonesomeTonight has no updates.
 
Member Since: Feb 2015
Location: US
Posts: 20,699 (SuperPoster!)
8 yr Member
74.8k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Feb 17, 2019 at 09:57 AM
  #694
Dear T,
I'd be too embarrassed to tell you this in real life. I saw that two unidentified men died in a car crash near one of our area airports early yesterday morning. I knew you were traveling yesterday (though not which airport) and was worried it could have been you (like with your brother maybe?) Even though it would have been the wrong direction from the airport. But I still worried. I found another article about the crash that gave a description of the two men and am pretty sure neither is you. I suppose it's possible that you have a large tattoo of a particular creature across your chest (though I somehow doubt it!), but you certainly don't look under 25 (no offense!), as they both did. I hate my brain sometimes...
Love you,
LT
LonesomeTonight is online now  
 
Hugs from:
InkyBooky, Lemoncake, SlumberKitty
 
Thanks for this!
DP_2017
Lemoncake
Luna's offical mini me.
 
Lemoncake's Avatar
Lemoncake Adult female human
 
Member Since: May 2017
Location: Cafe Nervosa.
Posts: 9,646 (SuperPoster!)
5 yr Member
10.1k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Feb 17, 2019 at 11:06 AM
  #695
I'm tempted to email and ask if I can have my tuesday slot back. Maybe we could have delayed it by 20 mins. But I don't want to break my 10 day streak if I'm being honest.

__________________
"Love, like life, flows
Through the heart.
Feel the thrill of the flow
And say nothing."

Lemoncake is offline  
 
Hugs from:
Anastasia~, LonesomeTonight, SlumberKitty
piggy momma
Poohbah
 
piggy momma's Avatar
piggy momma loves all pigs. ALL. THE. PIGS.
 
Member Since: Oct 2018
Location: Canada
Posts: 1,073
5 yr Member
70 hugs
given
Default Feb 17, 2019 at 11:55 AM
  #696
It took me fourteen months to trust you, to trust that you weren't going to just terminate me because you felt like it. Last session you told me you almost terminated me last fall because I took so many trips last year.

Why would you say that? Why would you tell me that when I JUST started to trust you in the last three months? Now I feel like I"m back to walking on eggshells with you. I really wish you had just kept that to yourself. No good came from it.
piggy momma is offline  
 
Hugs from:
Anastasia~, Elio, Lemoncake, LonesomeTonight, SlumberKitty, Under*Over
Anastasia~
Poohbah
 
Anastasia~'s Avatar
Anastasia~ has no updates.
 
Member Since: Jul 2017
Location: Somewhere
Posts: 1,019
5 yr Member
5,296 hugs
given
Default Feb 17, 2019 at 02:00 PM
  #697
I am afraid of all of this. I am terrified to still work, I can't do that anymore. I am terrified to do nothing. I want to try to relax and get rid of all of this anxiety that has built up.

__________________

Anastasia~ is offline  
 
Hugs from:
LonesomeTonight, SlumberKitty, WarmFuzzySocks
comrademoomoo
Grand Poohbah
 
comrademoomoo's Avatar
comrademoomoo is losing at chess, winning at blundering
 
Member Since: Feb 2019
Location: Toodlepip
Posts: 1,698
5 yr Member PC PoohBah!
Default Feb 17, 2019 at 02:19 PM
  #698
I don't want you to go on holiday. Again.
comrademoomoo is offline  
Under*Over
Member
 
Under*Over's Avatar
Under*Over has no updates.
 
Member Since: Mar 2018
Location: USA
Posts: 457
5 yr Member
177 hugs
given
Default Feb 17, 2019 at 03:00 PM
  #699
When you terminated me for being too sick- I understood. You told me it wasnt my fault, that you just werent equipt to deal with my condition should it worsen or I stop my medication again. I understood.

But it still hurt. I understand. But I still feel like... this just proved that Im an awful lost cause in some ways.

I didnt ask for much. I dont ever ask for much. But my illness takes. And this was just proof that- my illness also destroys. And that I really wish I didnt have to understand.
Under*Over is offline  
 
Hugs from:
Lemoncake, LonesomeTonight, Nik87, SlumberKitty
 
Thanks for this!
Lemoncake
Lemoncake
Luna's offical mini me.
 
Lemoncake's Avatar
Lemoncake Adult female human
 
Member Since: May 2017
Location: Cafe Nervosa.
Posts: 9,646 (SuperPoster!)
5 yr Member
10.1k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Feb 17, 2019 at 03:20 PM
  #700
I'm reading my old journal from this time last year. I'm glad I've kept my writings, but I literally sound deranged and I can't believe some of the things I've said to you...


__________________
"Love, like life, flows
Through the heart.
Feel the thrill of the flow
And say nothing."

Lemoncake is offline  
 
Hugs from:
Anastasia~, LonesomeTonight, SlumberKitty, unaluna, WarmFuzzySocks
All times are GMT -5. The time now is 07:18 PM.
Powered by vBulletin® — Copyright © 2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.



 

My Support Forums

My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.

 

Helplines and Lifelines

The material on this site is for informational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider.

Always consult your doctor or mental health professional before trying anything you read here.