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Member
Member Since Sep 2013
Posts: 459
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#1
I have never found another person who was lured into a “relationship” with her therapist, and who ended up living with her.
Am I really alone? |
AllHeart, Anonymous56789, HD7970GHZ, here today, koru_kiwi, Middlemarcher, missbella, precaryous, SalingerEsme, SlumberKitty, Waterloo12345
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Magnate
Member Since Jul 2011
Posts: 2,071
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#2
I haven't heard of anyone like that either. There are people on this forum who make claims that some relationships like that end up in happy marriages. I am yet to hear such a story from a person who actually married their therapist and lived happily with them for at least a few years, not from someone's who "knows" such person. I've read stories published by survivors who married their therapists and described how horrid the whole experience was: when they were in therapy, when they started seeing each other outside of therapy office and after they got married. Those marriages didn't last more than a year and there were few stories like that all together. Almost all exploitative relationships with therapists never even get to that point.
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HD7970GHZ, Topiarysurvivor, Whalen84
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Member
Member Since Aug 2018
Location: USA
Posts: 244
5 28 hugs
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#3
I think it’s the same with sexual exploitation of students by teachers/professors. It happens to a lot of people but there isn’t any organized community
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HD7970GHZ, Whalen84
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Grand Poohbah
Member Since Sep 2013
Location: N/A
Posts: 1,776
10 2,626 hugs
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#4
Quote:
I am so happy you have posted this thread. It helps others feel less alone. IT is a step in the right direction. Thanks, HD7970ghz __________________ "stand for those who are forgotten - sacrifice for those who forget" "roller coasters not only go up and down - they also go in circles" "the point of therapy - is to get out of therapy" "don't put all your eggs - in one basket" "promote pleasure - prevent pain" "with change - comes loss" |
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Topiarysurvivor
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Jun 2018
Location: Somewhere
Posts: 3,355
5 1 hugs
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#5
There was/is that woman who married her therapist, who claimed to have recovered memories of child abuse. Wrote a book called Michelle Remembers or something. He was involved in perpetuating the whole satanic panic era. I would definitely say he exploited the woman in question, along with all the other victims of the falsely recovered memories (the children and their families) and caused immeasurable harm to so many people with his unethical nonsense suggesting therapists can/should recover memories. I'm not saying repressed memories aren't a thing, but false memory syndrome is also unfortunately a very real phenomenon. And therapists like him are the primary culprits.
__________________ Life is hard. Then you die. Then they throw dirt in your face. -David Gerrold |
Topiarysurvivor, Whalen84
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Guest
Posts: n/a
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#6
You are not alone. My experience was similar. Sadly, I don't consider this forum a safe environment to discuss my experience. I hope you find support.
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Echos Myron redux, here today, koru_kiwi
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Elder Harridan x-hankster
Member Since Jun 2011
Location: Milan/Michigan
Posts: 39,869
(SuperPoster!)
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#7
I know of two people. One was a lesbian relationship that ended after a few years, the other was a heterosexual marriage (he was the t) that continues, AFAIK.
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Topiarysurvivor
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Jun 2012
Location: USA
Posts: 3,515
11 1,429 hugs
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#8
Just speaking for myself, I feel sad that you don't feel comfortable here discussing your experience. I've heard a little bit about it and -- just for what it is worth, hopefully something and hopefully not offensive or invalidating or unsafe -- you sound so strong and humorous that I thought you were saying the experience didn't bother you a bit. So much for my ways of understanding things, if that is wrong, which it sounds like it may be.
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Topiarysurvivor
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Jun 2012
Location: USA
Posts: 3,515
11 1,429 hugs
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#9
My experience with just plain old therapist trauma -- realizing I'd been duped by the whole establishment -- leaves me feeling alone. I think that's one of the things about interpersonal trauma in general -- that you were hurt and no one helped. It's still a very scary, lonely feeling for me that that happened. For so long, and that I let it happen, and the people who I was looking to for "help" didn't.
Whatever the unique circumstances of your exploitation, you are definitely not alone in FEELING very alone. Being brave in talking about it -- yeah, I definitely get that. Being so alone, and vulnerable, is a very scary feeling. |
koru_kiwi
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koru_kiwi, Topiarysurvivor
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Magnate
Member Since Jul 2011
Posts: 2,071
12 128 hugs
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#10
Quote:
I didn't mean to hijack the thread. I just felt it was important to point this out. |
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koru_kiwi, Topiarysurvivor, ~Isola~
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Jun 2012
Location: USA
Posts: 3,515
11 1,429 hugs
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#11
My feelings of sadness are my feelings. It's not about whether you, or anyone else, needs them or not.
I feel sad that this community may not be a place for lots of folks, including me sometimes, to talk about our inner experience. I have looked for connection here, and found it sometimes, and idealistically (my bad!) I wish that others felt more supported here, if that's what they want. I don't think I have any judgment about the way anybody else uses the forum, though. I'm OK that it's my idealism and others may not share that. If that comes off as judgmental, then thank you for telling me that, because that definitely is not something that I want. |
CrimsonBlues, DP_2017, koru_kiwi, Topiarysurvivor
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Magnate
Member Since Aug 2011
Posts: 2,082
12 78 hugs
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#12
Quote:
The power imbalance is huge and these students are in a learning setting and there are just so many parallels with toxic therapy. |
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blackocean, here today, Ididitmyway, Topiarysurvivor
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Magnate
Member Since Jul 2011
Posts: 2,071
12 128 hugs
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#13
Quote:
And, yeah, I am, probably, a bit more cynical (or realistic?) in my perceptions of public forums in general and this one in particular. But again, I am fine with those perceptions and also with the fact that others may not share them |
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here today, koru_kiwi, Topiarysurvivor
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Veteran Member
Member Since Oct 2011
Location: the sunny side of the street
Posts: 672
12 1,231 hugs
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#14
Quote:
i have shared some aspects here, but only two people know the full story and extent of what happened in my therapy and with my therapist and the after effects of it...my husband and a very dear online friend who i met on another support forum who also had a similar experince with her ex-T. |
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Ididitmyway, Topiarysurvivor
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Veteran Member
Member Since Oct 2011
Location: the sunny side of the street
Posts: 672
12 1,231 hugs
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#15
Quote:
i don't think i ever felt more alone as the time while i was trying to get my head around what was happening to me while in therapy with my ex-T. fortunately, i was brave enough to reach out to my husband for his support and he was very understanding and sympathetic of my situation, he wanted nothing more than to help. otherwise, without his help and support, i don't think i would have made it through. i definilty knew i was not going to put my trust into another T to help me through it. |
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Topiarysurvivor
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here today
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Magnate
Member Since Jul 2011
Posts: 2,071
12 128 hugs
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#16
Quote:
Quite a few people have found me online when they searched for info on professional exploitation and talked to me privately about their experiences. They told me they wouldn't even consider hanging out on forums. I wouldn't consider it either if I were a lay person, who had gone through this therapy ordeal. If I were someone, who has never invested in the professional training and education, frankly, I'd be doing my healing differently. I would try to connect with other survivors initially to get some support and validation, but, I doubt, I'd be hanging out with them in groups and on forums for a long time. I'd try to learn from the experience, let it be a part of who I've become as a result, embrace the new me and then close this chapter and move on with my life along with the lessons I've learned. I'd continue doing my personal work and continue to grow, but not through therapy. There are many ways of doing it. In fact, I know some people who have done just that and, frankly, I am jealous of them. But, may be I don't have to be stuck where I am either..May be I can also choose to do what they did, because it's a choice after all..Or may be I am already doing it in some way..I am trying to figure this out for myself.. |
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koru_kiwi, Topiarysurvivor
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Magnate
Member Since Jul 2011
Posts: 2,071
12 128 hugs
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#17
Quote:
My husband was just as supportive. Without his help and support primarily I wouldn't have made it. Then, there was a valuable initial support and help from AdvocateWeb and TELL. Theirs was just the right type of help at the right time. Then there was a long, painful road to healing, which still continues..I've gone a long way though.. |
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koru_kiwi, precaryous
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koru_kiwi, precaryous
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Grand Poohbah
Member Since Jun 2010
Location: here
Posts: 1,845
13 814 hugs
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#18
Quote:
TELL: Therapy Exploitation Link Line Another resource site. Surviving Therapist Abuse – Resources and Support for Healing Though I haven’t read an account of your situation specifically, I’ve read many variations of therapists exploitation, unfortunately. The book Therapist by Ellen Plasil recounts financial exploitation and a semi cult in addition to sexual exploitation. Last edited by missbella; Feb 12, 2019 at 03:44 AM.. |
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Inner Space Traveler
Member Since May 2014
Location: on the wing of an eagle
Posts: 3,880
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#19
I ‘knew’ an online acquaintance years ago who married her therapist and had a child together. At that point in their lives, the acquaintance was in the process of divorcing her husband and their daughter was having mh issues in college.
I was also inpatient with a woman who had two daughters by her priest. Don’t know if I ever knew if he left the priesthood to marry her. |
Magnate
Member Since Jul 2011
Posts: 2,071
12 128 hugs
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#20
Quote:
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Closed Thread |
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