Dear T: I really need to tell you something XXXIX

nottrustin · 06:58 PM

My heart is breaking in a million little pieces. A was driving back to college in the snowstorm. She hit the guardrail and totalled her vehicle. She is so upset because she totalled her car. She is in some pain from the seatbelts. Getting that call was horrible. For this momma, the 20 mile ride to get her was difficult especially since I couldn't communicate with you. I tried my best not to panic...holding it together for her. Really I just want to break down and cry. I want to talk to you.

Lrad123 · Mar 10, 2019 at 05:41 PM

I’ve had a whirlwind of emotions about you and therapy. Feeling sort of embarrassed by the emails that I sent which now seem overly dramatic to me although you have never said that. And I know you’ll read them which I’m not sure is good or bad.

Mar 10, 2019 at 06:10 PM

Probably the stupidest thing of all ok it is the stupidest is that I am doing this to myself by not calling you. H cracked a joke last night that I made it past his "over" of 10 days (it's been 24 but who's counting)(me evidently). I have this feeling that you'll be disappointed in me if I tell you we've decided together that we want to make our marriage work no matter how different it might have to be from before. Perhaps you have already guessed that since I haven't called assuming you have even thought about me of course. Oh hell. Why couldn't you have just acknowledged my response?! Would it really have been such a bad thing?! For Pete's sake. Grrr. Why can't I let this go? It's so stupid.

DP_2017 · Mar 10, 2019 at 08:46 PM

I just checked. 87 days

it's been that long since I've seen you, since I've last heard you laugh, since we went on a walk together, since we hugged. I miss it all and every single one of those days I have thought of you and loved you. I really hope this isn't the forever end. You are too amazing of a person to never see or speak to again

annielovesbacon · Mar 10, 2019 at 11:05 PM

I feel like I have disappointed you or let you down. I'm so sorry. I want to be better but I'm not sure I know how.

junkDNA · Mar 11, 2019 at 10:29 AM

hey is this gonna be mega awkward. I hope not lol

piggy momma · Mar 11, 2019 at 12:59 PM

I really need an answer. I hate when you leave me feeling like my time is not valuable.

LostOnTheTrail · Mar 11, 2019 at 02:23 PM

I'm losing my words.

SlumberKitty · Mar 11, 2019 at 02:47 PM

Dear T: Miss you. Kit

DP_2017 · Mar 11, 2019 at 02:58 PM

I'm tired of talking about you to someone who doesn't even know you. It's all pointless. I am taking a break. something I'd never have done with you, intentionally.

I miss you and I can only hope that some times, you miss me briefly

Lemoncake · Mar 11, 2019 at 03:34 PM

You asked me if I regretted the way things ended with my best friends. It was painful but I can honestly say no I don't. This, whatever this is between us - is starting to feel the same for me.

daisydid · Mar 11, 2019 at 04:35 PM

Yeah, the call from the office secretary about you canceling tomorrow's appointment was not the phone call I needed this morning.

piggy momma · Mar 11, 2019 at 04:49 PM

Why can’t all our sessions be as good as today’s was? Except the parts where you nodded off...but when you were with me, you were with me.

SlumberKitty · Mar 11, 2019 at 04:56 PM

Dear T: don't leave. Kit

Anastasia~ · Mar 11, 2019 at 05:12 PM

My social anxiety is excruciating and people think I am just faking it or something? The admin at work told me I was ruining the flow of things. Why do the only people that think I am okay -- are the ones who understand me. People at work, I don't know what they think. I want to go out on disability. I don't have a choice. Nothing I can do with what I"ve been given. I've not chose this path. I am not respectable, most people DON"T get me. I try so hard and it's all for naught. I wish I was a normal, respectable person. But I'm not. I am going to take an Ativan.

Elio · Mar 11, 2019 at 09:23 PM

I am not sure how much more of this [therapy] I can take. You did nothing wrong today. I just can't handle it anymore. I give.

Out There · Mar 11, 2019 at 11:47 PM

Existential perplexity. Will I work my way through it ? You seem to have , so maybe I can , with your support. I wish it wasn't so difficult though.

SummerTime12 · Mar 12, 2019 at 02:51 AM

My r*pist messaged me again. How can I heal when I know that I’m still on his mind... the world doesn’t feel safe

Mar 12, 2019 at 04:37 AM

well i think i might keep on going. for a while there i was tired and lost on the mountain, but i have looked back and saw how far i had come and the old me would have said well lets see whats on the other side. so in the spirit of the old me i will keep on going and forge a new path.

Lrad123 · Mar 12, 2019 at 06:04 AM

Let’s stop this game. I’m crying uncle. Please put me out of my misery.

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Dear T: I really need to tell you something XXXIX

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Lrad123 Poohbah Member Since Nov 2017 Location: United States Posts: 1,332 6 372 hugs given	Mar 10, 2019 at 05:41 PM #242 I’ve had a whirlwind of emotions about you and therapy. Feeling sort of embarrassed by the emails that I sent which now seem overly dramatic to me although you have never said that. And I know you’ll read them which I’m not sure is good or bad.
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annielovesbacon Grand Poohbah Member Since Apr 2016 Location: USA Posts: 1,527 8 1,271 hugs given	Mar 10, 2019 at 11:05 PM #245 I feel like I have disappointed you or let you down. I'm so sorry. I want to be better but I'm not sure I know how. __________________ stay afraid, but do it anyway.
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junkDNA Comfy Sedation Member Since Sep 2012 Location: the woods Posts: 19,301 (SuperPoster!) 11 8,149 hugs given	Mar 11, 2019 at 10:29 AM #246 hey is this gonna be mega awkward. I hope not lol __________________
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piggy momma Poohbah Member Since Oct 2018 Location: Canada Posts: 1,073 5 70 hugs given	Mar 11, 2019 at 12:59 PM #247 I really need an answer. I hate when you leave me feeling like my time is not valuable.
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LostOnTheTrail Tweaky Dog Member Since Aug 2011 Location: England Posts: 4,814 12 3,148 hugs given	Mar 11, 2019 at 02:23 PM #248 I'm losing my words. __________________ 'Somewhere up above the great divide Where the sky is wide, and the clouds are few A man can see his way clear to the light Just hold on tight, that's all you gotta do...' Steve Earle - Fort Worth Blues 'You have all the grace you need for today, and today is all that matters.' - Steve Austin
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SlumberKitty Legendary Wise Elder Member Since Jul 2018 Location: CA Posts: 27,329 (SuperPoster!) 5 117.7k hugs given	Mar 11, 2019 at 02:47 PM #249 Dear T: Miss you. Kit __________________ Dum Spiro Spero IC XC NIKA
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DP_2017 Grand Magnate Member Since Aug 2017 Location: A house Posts: 4,414 6 665 hugs given	Mar 11, 2019 at 02:58 PM #250 I'm tired of talking about you to someone who doesn't even know you. It's all pointless. I am taking a break. something I'd never have done with you, intentionally. I miss you and I can only hope that some times, you miss me briefly __________________ Grief is the price you pay for love.
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Lemoncake Luna's offical mini me. Member Since May 2017 Location: Cafe Nervosa. Posts: 9,730 (SuperPoster!) 6 10.2k hugs given	Mar 11, 2019 at 03:34 PM #251 You asked me if I regretted the way things ended with my best friends. It was painful but I can honestly say no I don't. This, whatever this is between us - is starting to feel the same for me. __________________ "Love, like life, flows Through the heart. Feel the thrill of the flow And say nothing."
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daisydid Member Member Since Oct 2018 Location: the astral plane Posts: 493 5 375 hugs given	Mar 11, 2019 at 04:35 PM #252 Yeah, the call from the office secretary about you canceling tomorrow's appointment was not the phone call I needed this morning.
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piggy momma Poohbah Member Since Oct 2018 Location: Canada Posts: 1,073 5 70 hugs given	Mar 11, 2019 at 04:49 PM #253 Why can’t all our sessions be as good as today’s was? Except the parts where you nodded off...but when you were with me, you were with me.
	Reply With Quote

SlumberKitty Legendary Wise Elder Member Since Jul 2018 Location: CA Posts: 27,329 (SuperPoster!) 5 117.7k hugs given	Mar 11, 2019 at 04:56 PM #254 Dear T: don't leave. Kit __________________ Dum Spiro Spero IC XC NIKA
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Elio ............... Member Since Sep 2006 Location: in my head Posts: 2,911 17 8,779 hugs given	Mar 11, 2019 at 09:23 PM #256 I am not sure how much more of this [therapy] I can take. You did nothing wrong today. I just can't handle it anymore. I give.
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Out There Legendary Member Since Oct 2015 Location: England Posts: 11,355 (SuperPoster!) 8 14.6k hugs given	Mar 11, 2019 at 11:47 PM #257 Existential perplexity. Will I work my way through it ? You seem to have , so maybe I can , with your support. I wish it wasn't so difficult though. __________________ "Trauma happens - so does healing "
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SummerTime12 Grand Member Member Since Mar 2013 Location: USA Posts: 876 11 601 hugs given	Mar 12, 2019 at 02:51 AM #258 My r*pist messaged me again. How can I heal when I know that I’m still on his mind... the world doesn’t feel safe
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Anonymous42961 Guest Posts: n/a	Mar 12, 2019 at 04:37 AM #259 well i think i might keep on going. for a while there i was tired and lost on the mountain, but i have looked back and saw how far i had come and the old me would have said well lets see whats on the other side. so in the spirit of the old me i will keep on going and forge a new path.
	Reply With Quote

Lrad123 Poohbah Member Since Nov 2017 Location: United States Posts: 1,332 6 372 hugs given	Mar 12, 2019 at 06:04 AM #260 Let’s stop this game. I’m crying uncle. Please put me out of my misery.
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