Couch 191: The Lazy Caterer Couch

stopdog · Mar 18, 2019 at 10:50 PM

I have had my younger dog for 2 yrs and 1 month. He is still a giant goofus even though he is about to turn 3 in a few months. This breed usually matures around 2. I think he needs to read the manual.

fille_folle · Mar 18, 2019 at 10:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CantExplain

They can understand things they cannot explain.

Well, yeah, and that was exactly what I was thinking, only not in a way where it was a good thing. If you can't explain why something you don't like is happening to you, you tend to develop all sorts of unhealthy "understandings" about yourself and other people. But I guess it's different when the discipline or punishment (is that a taboo word?) or whatever we're calling it follows some sort of logic that the kid will eventually be able to understand without personalizing it.

healed84 · Mar 18, 2019 at 11:04 PM

Scarlet.. the truth is even voicing your concerns, unluna is right in that yours is just an opinion to cps and probably won’t have much bearing on the decision. Likely what will happen is they will stay in a temporary placement while your sister is given time to get her act together and show the court that she has changed her priorities. In the long run neither situations are ideal, but those kids need somewhere to go, if you feel so strongly about it could your dad go somewhere else just until the kids go back with mom ?

fille_folle · Mar 18, 2019 at 11:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ScarletPimpernel

I didn't mean discipline as in spanking or time outs or any kind of punishment. Just how you would teach a child "no". And when I said more strick, I mean that I'll tell the one year old no to probably more things than my sister would. For example: my sister lets the 1 year old play with a hammer...a real hammer. I wouldn't let that happen. She lets her climb up on a step stool that's counter height. Again, I wouldn't allow it.

I am so confused about this terminology. Reminds me of when my T asked me if I had been "consequenced" for something as a child. I was so confused and asked her if she meant was I punished. I don't remember what she said to that...

ScarletPimpernel · Mar 18, 2019 at 11:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by healed84

Scarlet.. the truth is even voicing your concerns, unluna is right in that yours is just an opinion to cps and probably won’t have much bearing on the decision. Likely what will happen is they will stay in a temporary placement while your sister is given time to get her act together and show the court that she has changed her priorities. In the long run neither situations are ideal, but those kids need somewhere to go, if you feel so strongly about it could your dad go somewhere else just until the kids go back with mom ?

I know it's just an opinion. Both families actually want the babies with my sister which I also agree with. My sister has 3 weeks till the next hearing. Then she might get unsupervised visits or overnight visits. But you seriously wouldn't say anything if you really were worried? Yes, it might not matter, but what if something did happen?

Eta: my dad can't afford to be on his own, so he'd be homeless if we kicked out. Otherwise, yes we would.

healed84 · Mar 18, 2019 at 11:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ScarletPimpernel

I know it's just an opinion. Both families actually want the babies with my sister which I also agree with. My sister has 3 weeks till the next hearing. Then she might get unsupervised visits or overnight visits. But you seriously wouldn't say anything if you really were worried? Yes, it might not matter, but what if something did happen?

No, I am not saying don’t say anything. Share your view and knowledge of the situation. Just sharing with you my knowledge of the system. And sometimes actions speak louder than words. Tell the story, but give them action. I don’t know that situation, but if you feel like you and your h are the best possible solution and the only thing holding cps from letting the kids go with you is your father. Then, I would explore ways for my father could stay somewhere else for a short time just until kids could potentially go home with mom.

ScarletPimpernel · Mar 18, 2019 at 11:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by healed84

No, I am not saying don’t say anything. Share your view and knowledge of the situation. Just sharing with you my knowledge of the system. And sometimes actions speak louder than words. Tell the story, but give them action. I don’t know that situation, but if you feel like you and your h are the best possible solution and the only thing holding cps from letting the kids go with you is your father. Then, I would explore ways for my father could stay somewhere else for a short time just until kids could potentially go home with mom.

Yeah. I'll talk to H. My mom would also be a good choice, but she has involvement with CPS as well. My mom lives in a 55+ community, but would sell the house if it meant she could get the girls.

CantExplain · Mar 18, 2019 at 11:53 PM

Custody battles are always ugly and I don't know anyone who thinks the law knows best.

LostOnTheTrail · Mar 19, 2019 at 05:08 AM

Morning, Couch. Feeling somewhat frazzled today.

The immediate danger seems to be over, but I don't think my body and brain got the memo.

DP_2017 · Mar 19, 2019 at 07:10 AM

Spent 50 min in line yesterday to renew my license only to be told the new version of the license requires documents, so they sent me back, Sigh... so today will be attempt number 2. I hate going there, so many people in a small room. I am gonna try to get there close to opening time

NP_Complete · Mar 19, 2019 at 11:36 AM

I feel terrible mentally today. I need to get work done, but my brain is not cooperating. I have a 2-week deadline to get several projects finished, which is technically doable, but I'm feeling a lot of stress about it right now. I wish I could just disappear off the face of the earth. It feels like no one would miss me.

SlumberKitty · Mar 19, 2019 at 11:39 AM

Hi Couchies. Yesterday's T session didn't go great. It wasn't horrible, just the session before last was so good that this one felt....bleh. I thought she would be really pleased for me that I gave up SH for Lent. But she said, it sounds like you're just going to SH on Easter then. I know she was trying to get me to think beyond Easter, but sheesh, that's like in a month. I still need to focus on getting through these days. I'm....disappointed maybe....over how the session went. Especially because I don't go back until April 15th. HUGS Kit

unaluna · Mar 19, 2019 at 12:16 PM

@SlumberKitty Oh, Slumber! I didnt think of your vow that way at all! I TOTALLY took it as using the spiritual power of the time of Lent to strengthen a change of heart. Not like, SH is jellybeans.

i think your t has not integrated the idea of such a thing into her life, and still sees it as an outside rule to be followed, not a choice that is made.

ElectricManatee · 12:33 PM

NP, I would miss you. I don't know if internet randos count, though. It's like when my T and I argue about whether she's a real person.

I still wonder what happened to PC people who seemingly disappeared off the face of the Earth, like anais.

SlumberKitty · Mar 19, 2019 at 12:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by unaluna

@SlumberKitty Oh, Slumber! I didnt think of your vow that way at all! I TOTALLY took it as using the spiritual power of the time of Lent to strengthen a change of heart. Not like, SH is jellybeans.

i think your t has not integrated the idea of such a thing into her life, and still sees it as an outside rule to be followed, not a choice that is made.

Thank you Una. I needed this affirmation.

Kit

Omers · Mar 19, 2019 at 12:52 PM

@SlumberKitty I am with Unaluna... I don’t know if this helps or not but I know my T would be proud of you for using your spiritual journey to support you on your healing journey.

@ElectricManatee some of us disappear and reappear... this is my third stint on PC... before that it was 2011 and the first time was before the new format so a really long time ago.

OK... needy Omers is NEEDY... please post... needy Omers needs a distraction so she doesn’t email or text T.

SlumberKitty · Mar 19, 2019 at 01:03 PM

Thank you Omers!

Lemoncake · Mar 19, 2019 at 01:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by NP_Complete

I feel terrible mentally today. I need to get work done, but my brain is not cooperating. I have a 2-week deadline to get several projects finished, which is technically doable, but I'm feeling a lot of stress about it right now. I wish I could just disappear off the face of the earth. It feels like no one would miss me.

I would miss you NP.

Can you try to use the pomodoro method where you set a timer for 25 mins then take a break every 5 mins.

Mar 19, 2019 at 01:18 PM

I am trying to make myself focus working today but it's so beautiful outside I want to go hiking instead!

Hmm what else.... to give you stuff to read omers... um, well I wrote my extra credit report about the Apollo 11 film and got that submitted. H is out playing golf with friends visiting from out of town. Penelope allowed me to pick her up and snuggle her last night and she was even purring!! That was a rarity indeed....

Nothing else going on with me right now. Must try to do some work now...

unaluna · Mar 19, 2019 at 01:18 PM

@Omers wasssssup????? (I gotta go pee and make breakfast!)

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Couch 191: The Lazy Caterer Couch

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CantExplain Big Poppa Member Since Oct 2011 Location: New Zealand Posts: 19,616 (SuperPoster!) 12 19.7k hugs given	Mar 18, 2019 at 11:53 PM #868 Custody battles are always ugly and I don't know anyone who thinks the law knows best. __________________ Mr Ambassador, alias Ancient Plax, alias Captain Therapy, alias Big Poppa, alias Secret Spy, etc. Add that to your tattoo, Baby!

DP_2017 Grand Magnate Member Since Aug 2017 Location: A house Posts: 4,412 6 665 hugs given	Mar 19, 2019 at 07:10 AM #870 Spent 50 min in line yesterday to renew my license only to be told the new version of the license requires documents, so they sent me back, Sigh... so today will be attempt number 2. I hate going there, so many people in a small room. I am gonna try to get there close to opening time __________________ Grief is the price you pay for love.

NP_Complete Grand Magnate Member Since Feb 2017 Location: the upside down Posts: 3,808 7 6,349 hugs given	Mar 19, 2019 at 11:36 AM #871 I feel terrible mentally today. I need to get work done, but my brain is not cooperating. I have a 2-week deadline to get several projects finished, which is technically doable, but I'm feeling a lot of stress about it right now. I wish I could just disappear off the face of the earth. It feels like no one would miss me.

unaluna Elder Harridan x-hankster Member Since Jun 2011 Location: Milan/Michigan Posts: 39,863 (SuperPoster!) 12 66.4k hugs given	Mar 19, 2019 at 12:16 PM #873 @SlumberKitty Oh, Slumber! I didnt think of your vow that way at all! I TOTALLY took it as using the spiritual power of the time of Lent to strengthen a change of heart. Not like, SH is jellybeans. i think your t has not integrated the idea of such a thing into her life, and still sees it as an outside rule to be followed, not a choice that is made.

ElectricManatee Magnate Member Since May 2017 Location: Earth Posts: 2,515 6 4,704 hugs given	Mar 19, 2019 at 12:18 PM #874 NP, I would miss you. I don't know if internet randos count, though. It's like when my T and I argue about whether she's a real person. I still wonder what happened to PC people who seemingly disappeared off the face of the Earth, like anais. Last edited by ElectricManatee; Mar 19, 2019 at 12:33 PM..

SlumberKitty Legendary Wise Elder Member Since Jul 2018 Location: CA Posts: 27,329 (SuperPoster!) 5 117.7k hugs given	Mar 19, 2019 at 01:03 PM #877 Thank you Omers! __________________ Dum Spiro Spero IC XC NIKA

unaluna Elder Harridan x-hankster Member Since Jun 2011 Location: Milan/Michigan Posts: 39,863 (SuperPoster!) 12 66.4k hugs given	Mar 19, 2019 at 01:18 PM #880 @Omers wasssssup????? (I gotta go pee and make breakfast!)