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Default Apr 17, 2019 at 09:38 PM
  #941
Eating leftover steak from last night... Coal cat would like me to share my MooMouse... I am feeling stingy.

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Default Apr 17, 2019 at 09:44 PM
  #942
I decided to take both weekend days off again this weekend. Woo! Working only 10 hours overtime this week and next both. Paycheck won't be as good but that's ok. I need the rest!
 
 
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Default Apr 17, 2019 at 09:56 PM
  #943
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Originally Posted by ArtieSwimsOn View Post
I decided to take both weekend days off again this weekend. Woo! Working only 10 hours overtime this week and next both. Paycheck won't be as good but that's ok. I need the rest!
wow everything generally closes up for easter here.
 
 
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Default Apr 17, 2019 at 10:11 PM
  #944
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Here I go again. It is the morning of a therapy session. I was given homework to do and it didn't accomplish much. In fact it was a failure. I feel like a failure. I don't feel 'prepared' for this session. Does anyone else get this? The need to be prepared for a session?
Therapy homework is always optional.

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Default Apr 17, 2019 at 10:16 PM
  #945
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Originally Posted by DP_2017 View Post
I quit my job. After weeks of agonizing over it, because I hate it, well I hate my FT job too but I really hated this one because of the public aspect and rude people yelling at me. I got the courage to finally do it, and I talked to a woman about it, which really shocked me. She was super nice, I told her honestly that mentally I can't do it and she was talking about her struggle with anxiety and suggested therapy because it helped her. She told me they will list me as a rehire so if in the next year I feel well enough and want to return, I can.

I am kinda angry at my self because I struggle to find jobs and I feel like I blew it but I just really can't handle jobs with public right now. I need to get my head together first
It sounds to me like you handled it really well.

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Default Apr 17, 2019 at 10:17 PM
  #946
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My rage at the therapist has not been diminished by my session. In fact, I might be even angrier. I'm not completely sure... some legitimate grievances, but also a considerable dollop of negative transference.
In therapy, all grievances are legitimate.

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Default Apr 17, 2019 at 11:43 PM
  #947
Saw L tonight. It was really good. We laughed a ton! I asked her some personal questions and she actually answered them. I'm really starting to like her. I feel connected. But I feel like I'm betraying T. I don't know what to do. I'm trying so hard to push my feelings down. I keep wanting a hug afterwards, but I won't dare ask her yet. I don't know what to do. T helped me delay my attachment feelings with her. Maybe I should talk to L about it next time?

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Default Apr 17, 2019 at 11:53 PM
  #948
Well, it's the end of the day and there's been a bottle of wine sitting around waiting to be opened, so I poured a glass. I had high hopes for Drink Me.

Alas again. I have not shrunk either. Boring.

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Default Apr 18, 2019 at 12:57 AM
  #949
Well, H wants me to quit therapy We're running out of money. I don't want to, but I think I'll have to. I'm so depressed.

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Default Apr 18, 2019 at 01:47 AM
  #950
I did gym this morning at 7am, hence I'm eating cheesecake for breakfast.


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Default Apr 18, 2019 at 01:50 AM
  #951
Quote:
Originally Posted by ScarletPimpernel View Post
Saw L tonight. It was really good. We laughed a ton! I asked her some personal questions and she actually answered them. I'm really starting to like her. I feel connected. But I feel like I'm betraying T. I don't know what to do. I'm trying so hard to push my feelings down. I keep wanting a hug afterwards, but I won't dare ask her yet. I don't know what to do. T helped me delay my attachment feelings with her. Maybe I should talk to L about it next time?
You're not betraying your old T by feeling connected to new T.

Have you sold the house? If you need to save money perhaps you could do every other week. Will H agree to stop going to the hospital?

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Default Apr 18, 2019 at 01:57 AM
  #952
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You're not betraying your old T by feeling connected to new T.

Have you sold the house? If you need to save money perhaps you could do every other week. Will H agree to stop going to the hospital?
No. We just lowered the price of the house today by another $25k. We're trying real hard to get it sold.

H hasn't been going to the hospital lately. He's also stopped checking his bp and pulse. So he's being good there.

I can maybe reduce down to every other week. H wants me to go maybe once a month.

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Default Apr 18, 2019 at 03:03 AM
  #953
i just want to get away from myself
 
 
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Default Apr 18, 2019 at 03:04 AM
  #954
would it be weird if i sat around the corner of t building on Monday at my usual session time?
 
 
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Default Apr 18, 2019 at 06:48 AM
  #955
Eating again - I bloody hate this.

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Default Apr 18, 2019 at 07:00 AM
  #956
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Originally Posted by ScarletPimpernel View Post
Well, H wants me to quit therapy We're running out of money. I don't want to, but I think I'll have to. I'm so depressed.

Ugh, I'm sorry. Is there anything you could do to make a little money to cover it? Weren't you guys thinking of trying out doing meal or package delivery, something like that? Or is L willing to adjust your fees or let you carry a balance for a bit?
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Default Apr 18, 2019 at 07:13 AM
  #957
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Well, H wants me to quit therapy We're running out of money. I don't want to, but I think I'll have to. I'm so depressed.
But he still has that Tesla? Seems like he's sacrificing a great deal for a car. Speaks volumes.
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Default Apr 18, 2019 at 07:18 AM
  #958
I'm not sure why I'm still trying with baby T because I leave feeling like I wasted time but I'm going again today. Got my list of goals, see what he can help me do with that. I have one next week too and then I'm breaking/done with him. (Break for sure, but no idea how long)

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Default Apr 18, 2019 at 07:37 AM
  #959
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No. We just lowered the price of the house today by another $25k. We're trying real hard to get it sold.


H hasn't been going to the hospital lately. He's also stopped checking his bp and pulse. So he's being good there.


I can maybe reduce down to every other week. H wants me to go maybe once a month.
I don't know if this would work if you're using insurance since I was paying out of pocket, but I just thought of it. for awhile when I needed to pay less L (funny we both have an L) let me do half-sessions for half her normal rate. That way I could still talk to her same frequency, just shorter sessions. Hugs to you, scarlet.
 
 
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Default Apr 18, 2019 at 07:53 AM
  #960
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Eating again - I bloody hate this.
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