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Old 04-18-2019, 11:50 PM #11
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Default Re: EMDR vs. Talk Therapy

My childhood was primarily agony and terror. There was very, very little else that happened when I was around. C got all the good times. I don't know if she found EMDR useful. I didn't bother trying it myself. I wouldn't even know where to begin.
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Old 04-19-2019, 01:54 AM #12
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Default Re: EMDR vs. Talk Therapy

Quote:
Originally Posted by susannahsays View Post
My childhood was primarily agony and terror. There was very, very little else that happened when I was around. C got all the good times. I don't know if she found EMDR useful. I didn't bother trying it myself. I wouldn't even know where to begin.
Well, that's gotta suck. From one alter who didn't deal with bad stuff, I am sorry you got stuck with the hardest of stuff.
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Old 04-19-2019, 02:23 AM #13
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Default Re: EMDR vs. Talk Therapy

My T is a trauma specialist. I have been doing EMDR on and off for the last 2 years. I go twice a week and do EMDR probably two thirds of the time. He wants to start doing EMDR with some of my alters soon. I don't kniw how that is going to work out.

You basically only work on one memory or issue at a time but your brain goes where it wants to go which is fine. My T says your brain knows where it needs to go.

The more trauma you have had, the longer it will usually take. Also, if you tend to dissociate a lot you will have to go slow and do a lot of grounding work.

I have worked on a few memories and traumas but have never completed any of them because I usually go back into an earlier trauma and dissociate.

It sucks but I have to say I have made a lot of progress over the last two years. My T does a combination of EMDR, CBT, DBT, and a lot of mindfulness. I have also been going to DBT classes for the last year and a half. My T does not allow me to just talk and vent about what is happening each week. He will let me talk for about 5-10 minutes max unless I am totally freaking out about something and even then he will work in one of the modalities. My T is definitely not fun. It is hard work and he is constantly pushing me. I hate him for it sometimes but i must admit I am getting better.

I think you should give EMDR a try. My T has had a lot of success using it. Not so much yet with me but he always says if one or two of my traumas was the worst thing that ever happened to me like most people then I would have been done a long time ago.
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Old 04-19-2019, 07:35 AM #14
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Default Re: EMDR vs. Talk Therapy

I guess I don't have a specific issue to work on. In general I have several phobias and I have CPTSD but the phobias are not a priority to me right now. CPTSD is just always finding its way into my adult life. I have blocked most of my child and teen memories so I am not sure I guess how helpful it would be for me.
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Old 04-19-2019, 07:40 AM #15
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Default Re: EMDR vs. Talk Therapy

Zoiecat you pretty much described my experience with Emdr because of the disassociating. The last time we really tried it I really disassociated badly. After the appointment things spiraled out of control. It has been about a year. We needed to do more grounding work, then the loss of T changed the dynamics of my therapy with Emdr. We had to build more if a foundation so she could be my regular T and deal with the horrible grief I was/am dealing with. We both m have been apprehensive about returning to Emdr. Next appointment we are going to attempt to return but only taking tiny slivers of the past ti qorh through and not doing the reprocessing part. We will do this the first half of the appointment then found grounding and discuss other current less painful topics. Very nervous but willing try
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Old 04-19-2019, 09:25 AM #16
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Default Re: EMDR vs. Talk Therapy

Personally I hate doing EMDR but my T is all about progress and improvement. He won't allow me to just talk each session. I guess it is a necessary evil and I hate to admit it but I do feel like I am finally starting to make progress on an abusive college relationship. I am not looking forward to moving on to childhood issues. We have tried sone of those in the past but I dissociated too bad.

DP - I have described my EMDR experience as it pertains to my trauma background. A trained EMDR T can also help you with phobias. It is definitely worth a try and it may not take too long. My background makes EMDR very slow and painful for me but many people find it very helpful almost immediately.
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Old 04-19-2019, 09:32 AM #17
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Default Re: EMDR vs. Talk Therapy

My understanding is that EMDR is something that can be applied if you have something specific to hold on to - a memory, an intense emotion, something. I don't have much belief it works with severe avoidance because there is nothing to work with. That not only applies to EMDR but also to any kind of modality. The T must be very patient, alert and attuned to find something that accidentally slips through. I wouldn't blame the avoidant person though. The avoidance is there for a reason and the core of the work is establishing enough trust to lift this avoidance even a tiny bit.

I've once asked if EMDR could be something that could be useful for me. The answer is no - I don't have any specific traumatic memories. My whole childhood was emotionally neglectful but I did not perceive it so as this was my normal. So it would be impossible to find anything for the EMDR to focus on.
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Old 04-19-2019, 09:50 AM #18
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Default Re: EMDR vs. Talk Therapy

Quote:
Originally Posted by feileacan View Post
My understanding is that EMDR is something that can be applied if you have something specific to hold on to - a memory, an intense emotion, something. I don't have much belief it works with severe avoidance because there is nothing to work with. That not only applies to EMDR but also to any kind of modality. The T must be very patient, alert and attuned to find something that accidentally slips through. I wouldn't blame the avoidant person though. The avoidance is there for a reason and the core of the work is establishing enough trust to lift this avoidance even a tiny bit.

I've once asked if EMDR could be something that could be useful for me. The answer is no - I don't have any specific traumatic memories. My whole childhood was emotionally neglectful but I did not perceive it so as this was my normal. So it would be impossible to find anything for the EMDR to focus on.
I relate to this alot. First. You are right about avoiding behavior. That's where t really helped. He found a way to connect to me that no one really does. Therapy is tougher now because I don't want that relationship aspect so I'm extra avoiding

That being said, yes for me I thought it was normal too. T helped me see the reality of it all but I don't have much specific memories. The reason t3 suggested it was we talked about my fear of fire. I allegedly fell in a fire as a kid and I've always been nervous around fires since but I don't recall this event at all. I have no scars. He was saying the limbic system in my mind remembers the feeling though so that's why I am that way still with fire and he suggested emdr. However I also don't say this is a bad or intense phobia. It's quite easy to avoid in life etc so I'm unsure how helpful it would be

I have the more intense phobias I was working on with t but he helped somewhat with lessening the intensity of them but now I'm extra avoiding them anyway because it reminds me of him. So idk.
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Old 04-19-2019, 10:36 AM #19
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Default Re: EMDR vs. Talk Therapy

I started emdr for OCD and a specific phobia that other therapy wasn't addressing. It's goofy and weird. Mine uses her finger, I just follow it back and forth with my eyes. I get paranoid she is looking at me while I process and I dissociate and will just lose momentum a lot. There is no right or wrong way I guess.

I'd say try it. I think it has fuzzed out my bad memories some. They feel more like facts now but I can connect emotionally when I want to. It gives me control of it. It hasn't addressed my phobia at all though...T instead zoned right in on some trauma I didn't even plan to address.

I think emdr therapists (if they are good) are very skilled at rooting out emotions and trauma. It might be good if you are feeling like you don't know what to focus on.

I will warn you though...schedule thoughtfully. I am out of it for about 24 hours after and I always need a nap. I always stress eat after. Also a good emdr T should allow you some space if you need to do regular therapy some weeks.
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Old 04-19-2019, 10:55 AM #20
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Default Re: EMDR vs. Talk Therapy

My T does some EMDR with me sometimes but I don't think she does it right because all I ever do is dissociate when we are doing it, and she hasn't worked on grounding techniques (luckily I know some from previous therapy). I'm not a huge fan of it but I'm not sure my T does it right. (Not blaming my T, it just sounds like from what I've read and stuff that it doesn't seem like it's right--like maybe she's not trained in it.)
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