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ScarletPimpernel
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Default Jun 17, 2019 at 03:51 AM
  #301
I'm so depressed tonight when I should be happy. L gave me a beautiful scarf and another hug on Friday. I gave her a little necklace and a scarf I crocheted. Everything was awesome. I actually felt joyful...until I realized that this is all going to end in 3.5 months and L won't be my therapist anymore. And it breaks my heart. I HATE attachment. I HATE my feelings. I'm hurting so much. I bawled myself to sleep last night, tears throughout the day, and now every time I close my eyes to sleep, I cry again. I'm tired of life. Everyone I care about leaves me. Why can't they stay? Why can't I hold onto the joyful feelings? This is why I didn't want to get attached. It's just too painful. I like L too much.

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Default Jun 17, 2019 at 03:59 AM
  #302
I really want to go back and it frustrates me that I can't and the only way I can deal with this frustration is to persist in asking to come back. I just want to be safe again.
 
 
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Default Jun 17, 2019 at 04:03 AM
  #303
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Originally Posted by ScarletPimpernel View Post
I'm so depressed tonight when I should be happy. L gave me a beautiful scarf and another hug on Friday. I gave her a little necklace and a scarf I crocheted. Everything was awesome. I actually felt joyful...until I realized that this is all going to end in 3.5 months and L won't be my therapist anymore. And it breaks my heart. I HATE attachment. I HATE my feelings. I'm hurting so much. I bawled myself to sleep last night, tears throughout the day, and now every time I close my eyes to sleep, I cry again. I'm tired of life. Everyone I care about leaves me. Why can't they stay? Why can't I hold onto the joyful feelings? This is why I didn't want to get attached. It's just too painful. I like L too much.
I feel your pain
 
 
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Default Jun 17, 2019 at 10:09 AM
  #304
We are having thunderstorms again. The farmers around here are having a terrible year - so much rain they can't plant and what they did plant has washed/ been flooded away.

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Default Jun 17, 2019 at 10:56 AM
  #305
Well, the government does heavily subsidize insurance for farmers. So there's that. Hopefully they will be ok even if the yields are terrible.

I am on vacation and I am not having a good time. I should be. I have a lovely room and bathroom all to myself. King bed, balcony, mini fridge/freezer, microwave, etc. Finally can control the thermostat and am liberated from the tyranny of my roommate who thinks 74°F is a reasonable temperature in both the summer and winter (and my room gets 1-4 degrees hotter than the thermostat says in the summer). I should be very pleased. But both my ears are infected. Started antibiotics yesterday. The worst part isn't the ear pain. It's the headache. I was worried that flying was going to be painful (I hadn't gone to the doctor yet, but was pretty sure they were infected), but it wasn't too bad. Actually, the initial ear popping and clearing felt like it relieved some of the pressure.

Anyway, I was hoping that this would be like other infections and I would start feeling better soon after starting the antibiotics. So far, no luck.

Pity party over for now. Just needed to whine here a bit since I don't want to impose that on the family members on vacation with me.

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Default Jun 17, 2019 at 11:15 AM
  #306
From a student perspective, I like canvas more than blackboard. My least favorite has been moodle. However, I think some of my perception may reflect more on certain professors than the actual platforms. I'm not sure how much control you can exert over the way things are displayed. I just noticed that the blackboard courses looked more sloppy, haphazard, were less intuitive, and more difficult to navigate than the canvas courses. The moodle course was basically a shitshow.

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Default Jun 17, 2019 at 11:37 AM
  #307
I loathed Moodle. I do agree Canvas looks better—but ultimately I think with Blackboard it comes down to how organized the professor is and how much effort they put into the course site design. Canvas requires less work to organize (unless the people who transfer your old Blackboard site to Canvas mess it up).

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Default Jun 17, 2019 at 12:23 PM
  #308
Other story I have out accepted. Better press.

Guess I need to work on the stories in progress or that need revision now.
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Default Jun 17, 2019 at 12:30 PM
  #309
Congratulations, ATAT.

I'm in the middle of research for my latest project, or trying to be. Why the heck do you lose access to all of the research databases and such after you are no longer studying? Frustrating.

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Default Jun 17, 2019 at 02:16 PM
  #310
Congratulations ATAT.

We are moving from blackboard to something but I don't remember what it is.

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Default Jun 17, 2019 at 02:35 PM
  #311
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Other story I have out accepted. Better press.

Guess I need to work on the stories in progress or that need revision now.
Arthur! Arthur!
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Default Jun 17, 2019 at 02:49 PM
  #312
Yay well done @@!

Can we now say that we knew you first before you became famous?



My first uni had blackboard, my second uses moodle + some departments have their own website.

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Default Jun 17, 2019 at 02:52 PM
  #313
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Originally Posted by ScarletPimpernel View Post
I'm so depressed tonight when I should be happy. L gave me a beautiful scarf and another hug on Friday. I gave her a little necklace and a scarf I crocheted. Everything was awesome. I actually felt joyful...until I realized that this is all going to end in 3.5 months and L won't be my therapist anymore. And it breaks my heart. I HATE attachment. I HATE my feelings. I'm hurting so much. I bawled myself to sleep last night, tears throughout the day, and now every time I close my eyes to sleep, I cry again. I'm tired of life. Everyone I care about leaves me. Why can't they stay? Why can't I hold onto the joyful feelings? This is why I didn't want to get attached. It's just too painful. I like L too much.
If you find L helpful perhaps you still see her as a back up whenever original T goes on a break?

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Default Jun 17, 2019 at 03:47 PM
  #314
Congrats, @@!
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Default Jun 17, 2019 at 03:49 PM
  #315
Way to go ATAT.
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Default Jun 17, 2019 at 03:51 PM
  #316
Couch question. You'd originally scheduled your session for a day later than usual (due to attending a concert), but quite early in the morning (due to daughter's school schedule). You ask your T if he can see you on your usual day, if he has any times available. Your T says he has a funeral that day and isn't sure of his exact schedule, but would be able to see you. You say that you feel bad asking him to come in, but he said he wouldn't have offered if he wasn't OK with it. Bonus: There's a potentially emotion-filled concert the night before that rescheduled session would be (as in, the same band at the same venue that led you to email your former marriage counselor feelings of love a year and a half ago, which ultimately was the death knell for the relationship). In other words, not sure how well I'll be dealing the morning after the concert. Is it OK to take your T up on his offer to see you the day of the funeral? (No clue how he knows the deceased.)

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Default Jun 17, 2019 at 03:52 PM
  #317
Good job, ATAT!
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Default Jun 17, 2019 at 04:03 PM
  #318
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Yay well done @@!


Can we now say that we knew you first before you became famous?





I won’t consider myself famous till I have a story in the New Yorker (an ultimate goal, and one I may never meet, but plan to have fun trying).

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Default Jun 17, 2019 at 04:11 PM
  #319
Is that two stories now? You're on a roll!
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Default Jun 17, 2019 at 04:20 PM
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Is that two stories now? You're on a roll!

Yeah, but I don’t have any more ready to send out just now. That’s next up.

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