FAQ/Help |
Calendar |
Search |
Grand Magnate
Member Since Jan 2014
Location: n/a
Posts: 4,819
10 375 hugs
given |
#41
[QUOTE=BudFox;6579253]The internet is filled with stories of therapists reciprocating. Or initiating. ****The intwrnet is also filled with amazing therapists who help clients fo on the live better lives*******
There are also many stories of people caught up in humiliating unrequited fake therapy love. ****there are many stories of therapists eho help client's work through these feelings***** Therapy is set up to provoke this s**t. Therapists are serial seducers (often subtle). It's convenient to blame the client for "getting the wrong idea". ****SOME Ts are pathetic asses**** It's a great profession for sexual predators. Emotional predators too.[/QUOTE *****as are many other professions....the profession itself doesnt promote or xonsone these. As in every other procession there are good and the bad. __________________ |
Reply With Quote |
SalingerEsme
|
ArtleyWilkins, SalingerEsme
|
underdog is here
Member Since Sep 2011
Location: blank
Posts: 34,731
(SuperPoster!)
12 1 hugs
given |
#42
Therapists are in it to make a living. Any specific client is expendable.
Don't bet more than you are willing to lose. Therapists are master manipulators who often get off on power and adoration. Therapists and other clients will seek to shame and blame you if things go amiss - don't believe them. Therapy is not the only road to happiness or "healing" or anything else. It is one tool that might help you or not -but it is not the only thing possible of helping and it can cause great harm. Don't rush in, be cautious, and keep your head and emotions in check. Take classes to know how they manipulate and do stuff at clients. I found that very helpful in fending the woman off from doing at me what I did not want. Be firm with them and keep your boundaries firm and tight. __________________ Please NO @ Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others to live as one wishes to live. Oscar Wilde Well Behaved Women Seldom Make History - Laurel Thatcher Ulrich Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional. Last edited by stopdog; Jul 10, 2019 at 09:05 PM.. |
Reply With Quote |
BudFox, CrimsonBlues, here today, koru_kiwi, missbella, SalingerEsme, SilverTongued, Xynesthesia2
|
Grand Magnate
Member Since Jan 2014
Location: n/a
Posts: 4,819
10 375 hugs
given |
#43
Quote:
I agree with most of the last patagraphy. __________________ |
|
Reply With Quote |
SalingerEsme
|
Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2014
Location: US
Posts: 22,376
(SuperPoster!)
9 1,277 hugs
given |
#44
Quote:
Of course there are awful therapists who sexually or otherwise abuse their clients. In my post I wasn’t referring to those situations. I was specifically referring to unfortunate situations when clients expect therapists to reciprocate to their feelings and respond to advances. Someone who has never been in therapy needs to be warned that expectations of therapists becoming their lovers and friends (during or after therapy) etc are totally unrealistic. It would save some people ton of heartache if they were warned ahead of time. |
|
Reply With Quote |
SalingerEsme
|
Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2014
Location: US
Posts: 22,376
(SuperPoster!)
9 1,277 hugs
given |
#45
Quote:
|
|
Reply With Quote |
SalingerEsme
|
Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2014
Location: US
Posts: 22,376
(SuperPoster!)
9 1,277 hugs
given |
#46
Therapists are there to work like all of us. Don’t be surprised that they are getting paid lol they aren’t volunteers.
As in any profession there are some good therapists and some bad as there are bad doctors and good doctors etc They aren’t G-ds, they are just regular folks like the rest of us. I have a very good dentist but if I don’t brush and floss and don’t watch my diet my teeth will fall out no matter how good is my dentist. She isn’t miracle worker. Therapists aren’t miracle workers either. Don’t be afraid to stop therapy if it doesn’t suit you or your therapist sucks or you simply want to do other things in life. Unless court ordered you aren’t required to spend your entire life in therapy |
Reply With Quote |
koru_kiwi, Lonelyinmyheart, missbella, SalingerEsme, Xynesthesia2
|
Grand Magnate
Member Since Feb 2015
Location: US
Posts: 3,983
9 752 hugs
given |
#47
Quote:
Therapists imply lots of things about client expectations. It's one of many techniques they use to deflect accountability. |
|
Reply With Quote |
SalingerEsme
|
koru_kiwi, missbella, SalingerEsme, SilverTongued, stopdog
|
Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2014
Location: US
Posts: 22,376
(SuperPoster!)
9 1,277 hugs
given |
#48
Quote:
That’s why I believe that it’s a valid warning:: regardless what is one’s goal or reason for attending therapy therapists cannot be their friends or lovers. I firmly believe that it would save everyone a lot of pain and suffering if they knew that . I would even go as far as suggesting that therapists should give a disclaimer about it when take on a new client. Personally I’d probably be a bit taken aback if t gave me such disclaimer, but I’ve seen evidence that many people would benefit from such disclaimer. We can agree to disagree. I believe it’s a valid warning based on ton of evidence from this forum alone |
|
Reply With Quote |
SalingerEsme
|
SalingerEsme
|
Grand Poohbah
Member Since May 2019
Location: USA
Posts: 1,523
4 6,984 hugs
given |
#49
Quote:
|
|
Reply With Quote |
divine1966
|
divine1966, SalingerEsme
|
Grand Poohbah
Member Since May 2019
Location: USA
Posts: 1,523
4 6,984 hugs
given |
#50
Quote:
|
|
Reply With Quote |
divine1966
|
divine1966, SalingerEsme
|
Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2014
Location: US
Posts: 22,376
(SuperPoster!)
9 1,277 hugs
given |
#51
My t told me that she has met or heard of ton of therapists who abuse substances: alcohol and/or drugs. I found it quite interesting. I never thought about it as none of the ones I know (personally as well as professionally) abuse substances. Scary warning: be aware of a t who is on something? Hope they abused substances in their spare time not at work. Jeez
|
Reply With Quote |
SalingerEsme
|
Grand Magnate
Member Since Jan 2014
Location: n/a
Posts: 4,819
10 375 hugs
given |
#52
Therapy may be the hardest and most painful thing you do. It can take a long time even years to meet your goals. Often just when you are starting to make progress something will happen and push you backwards.
__________________ |
Reply With Quote |
SalingerEsme
|
Grand Magnate
Member Since Feb 2015
Location: US
Posts: 3,983
9 752 hugs
given |
#53
Quote:
|
|
Reply With Quote |
SalingerEsme
|
SalingerEsme, SilverTongued
|
Threadtastic Postaholic
Member Since Dec 2018
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 6,006
(SuperPoster!)
5 192 hugs
given |
#54
Do not feel bad for stopping therapy. I saw a therapist for like 15 years and the last 5 were a waste of my time. We would basically shoot the s*** for 50 minutes every week and I would pay him my copay.
__________________ "I carried a watermelon?" President of the no F's given society. |
Reply With Quote |
koru_kiwi, SalingerEsme
|
Poohbah
Member Since Jun 2019
Location: Earth
Posts: 1,093
4 1,732 hugs
given |
#55
The number 1 thing to check imo is that your therapist has supervision. As far as I know this isn't the law in the US and I find that shocking. In the Uk, professional therapists who are regulated under BACP and other professional bodies have to have regular supervision whilst seeing clients. This is because therapists are human too (no, really?) and have blind spots, especially when a client touches on their personal issues. It can't be assumed that any therapist, no matter how well qualified, can rely on his or her own judgement when emotions are being pressed. It is vital that a therapist can take their work with clients to supervision and not to mention important for their emotional wellbeing as well. I would never see a T who claimed they didn't need supervision. Big warning bells right there.
|
Reply With Quote |
SalingerEsme
|
Grand Magnate
Member Since Feb 2015
Location: US
Posts: 3,983
9 752 hugs
given |
#56
The therapist I had trouble with got supervision. She came back with a new persona (more distant) and a bit later started trying to get rid of me.
Therapists have different priories from clients. The two of them getting together did not help me. It helped my therapist cover her *** and get support for HER problems. I've seen a short video of the supervisor. She seems clueless. It's considered a plus if a therapist has done a lot of his/her own therapy and gets supervision. But it's not a plus if it's the blind leading the blind. It's a dysfunctional family and the delusions get passed down thru the generations. It's a closed system and there are no reality checks from outside the system. Who advocates for the client? Nobody. |
Reply With Quote |
SalingerEsme
|
CrimsonBlues, here today, koru_kiwi, SalingerEsme
|
Grand Magnate
Member Since Jan 2014
Location: n/a
Posts: 4,819
10 375 hugs
given |
#57
Quote:
Emdr T gas been practicing for 10 years and she monthly supervision. This person helps her brainstorm ideas and get a fresh perspective. She has spoken to her supervisor a couple of times about me. __________________ |
|
Reply With Quote |
SalingerEsme
|
Grand Magnate
Member Since Jun 2012
Location: USA
Posts: 3,515
11 1,429 hugs
given |
#58
Quote:
|
|
Reply With Quote |
koru_kiwi, SalingerEsme
|
Magnate
Member Since Oct 2018
Location: USA
Posts: 2,787
5 7 hugs
given |
#59
My therapists strongly advocated for me.
|
Reply With Quote |
SalingerEsme
|
Grand Magnate
Member Since Jun 2012
Location: USA
Posts: 3,515
11 1,429 hugs
given |
#60
Mine didn't. Nobody advocates for me, still. And though I try my best to do it for myself, it is difficult to overcome the damage from the past, and to articulate the damage in a way that can be heard and accepted as possibly valid.
|
Reply With Quote |
koru_kiwi, SalingerEsme
|
BudFox, SalingerEsme
|
Reply |
|