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catches the flowers
Member Since Jul 2019
Location: Downtown Vibes, California
Posts: 15,701
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Aug 21, 2019 at 03:26 PM
#1
What are you hoping to achieve in therapy? Do you feel/believe that being able to attach (trust, open up to) to your therapist is one of your goals?
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Tweaky Dog
Member Since Aug 2011
Location: England
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Aug 21, 2019 at 04:07 PM
#2
I have found being able to trust my therapist key to being able to progress towards my goals.
1) Building tolerance towards difficult emotions. 2) Expressing my needs as comfortably as possible. 3) Processing difficult stuff. __________________ 'Somewhere up above the great divide Where the sky is wide, and the clouds are few A man can see his way clear to the light 'You have all the grace you need for today, and today is all that matters.' - Steve Austin |
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 *Beth*
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Jul 2018
Location: CA
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Aug 21, 2019 at 04:31 PM
#3
While I don't think attaching to my therapist is one of my goals of therapy, I do think that it is important to be able to trust my therapist, which I am working on currently. I recently shared with her about some childhood trauma and while her overall demeanor was fine, she lacked a response at a crucial time for me which makes trusting her a bit harder. But it's give and take and we are slowly forming a therapeutic alliance.
Goals in therapy: To stop SH-ing. To become less depressed/suicidal...more able to cope with daily life. Lessening of hallucinations/or lessening their impact on me. To become more independent from my parents. __________________ Dum Spiro Spero IC XC NIKA |
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*Beth*
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underdog is here
Member Since Sep 2011
Location: blank
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Aug 21, 2019 at 04:34 PM
#4
I decided to hire a therapist to try and fix one specific thing. I never had a goal of attaching to a therapist and I never thought it would have helped me to do so in any way.
__________________ Please NO @ Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others to live as one wishes to live. Oscar Wilde Well Behaved Women Seldom Make History - Laurel Thatcher Ulrich Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional. |
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*Beth*
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Magnate
Member Since Oct 2018
Location: USA
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Aug 21, 2019 at 05:00 PM
#5
Quote:
I, personally, have to feel comfortable with my therapist. There needs to be a sense that we "click." I tried a few therapists that were a bit like talking to a door post; not for me. I don't get overly attached and am not particularly needy as a client, but I simply work better with someone whose personality meshes with my own. Over the years working with my long-term therapists, we grew rather fond of each other as the people we are. We got along well. Yes, that is important for me. Is it a goal? No. It's simply an initial requirement; I can tell pretty quickly when I'll get along well with a person. I go with my gut. It's either there from the beginning, or there won't be a future in therapy with that particular therapist. |
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*Beth*
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Elder
Member Since Jul 2017
Location: MO
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Aug 21, 2019 at 05:51 PM
#6
Are you a student? Your questions seem like they are from someone studying behavior.
__________________  "Love you. Take care of you. Be true to you. You are the only you, you will ever know the best. Reach for YOUR stars. You can reach them better than anyone else ever can." Landon Clary Eason Grateful Sobriety Fangirl Since 11-16-2007 Happy Sober Crafter |
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*Beth*
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catches the flowers
Member Since Jul 2019
Location: Downtown Vibes, California
Posts: 15,701
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Aug 21, 2019 at 09:17 PM
#7
Thanks for the replies. It's interesting how clients seem to approach therapy from such different angels. I mean, for me...the attachment to my T has to be #1 or I can't stay with the treatment. Of course, it's all about where we come from, the circumstances. I wonder how much age has to do with our therapy goals? Maybe it's more about the stage of life we're in, regardless of our actual age.
Quote:
Hi HC, No...the last time I was a student was around 1990. Been awhile  . I do like to think of myself as a student of life, though (forgive the cliche). I asked the question because I'm working on some therapy goals myself right now. My pdoc commented, last time I saw her, that I was "dependent" on my T. I thought, well...yeah...I do feel like my T is a big part of my life. But I don't think I'm overly-dependant. I was kind of annoyed by my pdocs assertion, and wondered how others feel about their therapists. Sorry...I was rushing when I typed the OP earlier today and didn't explain myself. __________________ |
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Nov 2010
Location: Crimson cattery
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Aug 21, 2019 at 11:21 PM
#8
While not one of my goals my T believes attachment both ways is essential to therapeutic progress.
My goal when we started was that my priest form college said he hoped some day to see me truly happy and free from the things that haunt me. I tried therapy for years and only got worse so I gave up and we talked about it and he still held hope for me. When I discovered he would be retiring in the next couple of years the goal haunted me into a deep, painful despair and I found current T. I told him I had done a lot of work in therapy and had come very far but happiness and freedom still eluded me. But... then T and I started working and I quickly discovered that even suggesting the previous therapists had put a bandaid on a huge, gaping, infected wound would suggest they had done far more than they actually had. So... our long term outcome has remained the same but I can’t really call it a goal any more. __________________ There’s been many a crooked path that has landed me here Tired, broken and wearing rags Wild eyed with fear -Blackmoores Night |
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Aug 22, 2019 at 01:18 AM
#9
I just wanted the pain to stop.
I had no idea of goals, wanting to open up etc. Those thoughts at that stage would have been a luxury |
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 SlumberKitty
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