The hard truth

Crook32 · Jan 19, 2020 at 07:52 PM

My T called because she was concerned about an email I sent to her office. She has temporarily fixed our scheduling problem but in still think I may need to find a new T closer to work. She said she cares and is worried about me. That she is not cold hearted but it is still her job. So there it is out in the open. She may care but in the end everything in the end is just her job. Of course I have always known this but to hear her say it still stings.

~Christina · Jan 19, 2020 at 10:42 PM

I think she’s really trying to help you schedule wise. You two have a long history, wouldn’t it be best if you do find a new T to transition in a healthy way and not have anger towards the old T take up sessions with the new one?

If your T truly didn’t care she certainly would not take time to call you.

Hope things get sorted for you

stopdog · Jan 19, 2020 at 11:00 PM

I think it is healthy to be angry at them.
And clients are just their job - I will say I find it useful when they just go ahead and admit it rather than playing games of semantics etc about it.

Lonelyinmyheart · Jan 20, 2020 at 06:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Crook32

My T called because she was concerned about an email I sent to her office. She has temporarily fixed our scheduling problem but in still think I may need to find a new T closer to work. She said she cares and is worried about me. That she is not cold hearted but it is still her job. So there it is out in the open. She may care but in the end everything in the end is just her job. Of course I have always known this but to hear her say it still stings.

I'm sorry that your T said that to you. Of course a T needs to keep a roof over their head and bread on the table like everyone else, but for most therapists it isn't only a job, it's being of service to others. There will be exceptions like there is in any line of work but for most therapists it's a vocation - something they are drawn to. It must have been devastating to hear your T say that and I wish she hadn't. It sounds like maybe she feels out of her depth but that is due to her and nothing to do with your issues. If that's how she feels another T would be best but it's the last thing you probably want to do. Please hold onto the fact that for many therapists the care and support is genuine regardless of the money situation - my current T halved her fee for me so that she doesn't get much out of me at all, never mind enough to live on! She doesn't make a lot of money, but she is there for me even during her holidays! It just depends who you see, their boundaries and personal ability to give of themselves to the work. I hope your next T will be lovely.

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The hard truth

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