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Member Since Jan 2020
Location: New York
Posts: 27
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#1
I am a woman in my 30s. I am switching pdocs again. This is going to be my 6th one in 2 years because they all ultimately told me some variation of how they are stumped about what to prescribe because nothing works. My therapist promised me a list of names, but came back with only one: a male pdoc.
I have become wary of male doctors because I had only male doctors until my 20s and they all ignored my anxiety from when it first started in childhood, telling my parents and then me "you'll grow out of it" and "it will pass." I went to a male pdoc 1.5 years ago and for 6 months he was hesitant to take me off a med that caused me a 20lb weight gain that I couldn't shake, telling me I "looked" underweight before I started it so this new weight could be my normal weight. This was despite me telling him each time that the previous weight had been my normal weight and it's what I weighed for the past 8-10 years without watching what I ate. This new male pdoc seems knowledgeable according to his website. I am hesitant to call him, but, on the other hand, I have no other names or ideas about who to see. Should I put aside my wariness of male doctors and give him a chance or stick with my feelings about male doctors and somehow try to find a female doctor? |
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Nov 2010
Location: Crimson cattery
Posts: 3,512
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#2
I have always been wary of men and I am now working with a male T. I was very worried at first but he is definitely the right T for me and that overcame his being male very quickly. I have a lot of trust in him now and feel extremely safe with him.
I’ve worked with Pdocs that didn’t get me before. It sucks! They had their little boxes that all their patients fit into and we just need to squish you into the closest fitting box. Disaster! It took me a long time to find a good Pdoc but she is worth her weight in gold! I had been put on everything from antidepressants to antipsychotics with worsening symptoms and atypical side effects. I was fired by one Pdoc for being too medically complicated for her to manage! Once I found the right Pdoc we did a couple med changes, went through my history of medications and symptoms with a fine tooth comb and she decided to “just start all over”. I went into a panic! She wanted to try one medication that has been out a long time, generic, well tolerated, low side effects and well, pretty boring compared to all the other stuff I have been on. It has been nearly 10 years now and I am on the same medication. We know that we have to adjust dose and frequency here and there as needed (I even went off it completely for over a year until I went back into therapy) but it works. It significantly improves my quality of life in the times that I need it. I would say give it a try. If you get to the appointment and find you like him but cannot get past his being male perhaps he can refer you to a female Pdoc that is similar to him. __________________ There’s been many a crooked path that has landed me here Tired, broken and wearing rags Wild eyed with fear -Blackmoores Night |
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LonesomeTonight
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Always in This Twilight
Member Since Feb 2015
Location: US
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#3
I would give him a try. If he seems dismissive and/or you feel uncomfortable with him, you don't have to go back. But all male doctors aren't the same.
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NP_Complete
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Jul 2018
Location: CA
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#4
I would try him and see what happens. I have a male Pdoc who is terrific! I have a female GP who is just okay. And I have both a female T and a male T. There's good and bad stuff about all of them. Except my Pdoc who is pretty dang amazing. (Helps that he has a neurology background--at least in my situation.) If you can't work with him then you'll know and you can resume your search. You never know until you try. Best of Luck--Kit
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Veteran Member
Member Since Jan 2019
Location: Pittsburgh
Posts: 570
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#5
My male psychiatrist is an absolute gem.
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HopeForChange
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HopeForChange
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Member
Member Since Jan 2020
Location: In The Dojo
Posts: 196
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#6
I had a mixture of nice male psychiatrists and crappy ones. One of the worst psychiatrists I had was a female. She was a b%$#*!
If it is hard to find a psychiatrist in your area, (it is for me) I would suggest trying him out. |
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HopeForChange
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HopeForChange
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Member
Member Since Oct 2014
Location: Boston, MA
Posts: 257
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#7
Quote:
Last edited by peacelizard; Feb 25, 2020 at 05:59 PM.. Reason: Grammar and typos |
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Threadtastic Postaholic
Member Since Dec 2018
Location: New Jersey
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#8
I get your concern. With mental health it has been proven that there is an underlying bias with women and their symptoms because some men tend to look at us as the "hysterical woman" and discount our experiences. I have had only female psyches. But that doesnt mean you shouldnt try this one. Just be prepared for things and if he gives any inkling that he doesnt believe you or cant help you then do not see him again.
__________________ "I carried a watermelon?" President of the no F's given society. |
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Threadtastic Postaholic
Member Since Dec 2018
Location: New Jersey
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#9
Hey @Val12 you dont say if you are in NY state or city but I did a quick search for you.
New York Psychiatrists - Psychiatrist New York, New York County, New York - Psychiatric Nurses New York, New York County, New York Quote:
__________________ "I carried a watermelon?" President of the no F's given society. |
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Member
Member Since Jan 2020
Location: New York
Posts: 27
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#10
Thank you for your advice everyone! I bit the bullet and called him. Here is how it went:
I let him know what my disorders are and asked if he treats people with these disorders. He laughed and said "yeah...I'm a psychiatrist...of course I do." He told me his fees are $700 for a 45 min appointment. Not the expected outcome. |
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LonesomeTonight, SlumberKitty
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Always in This Twilight
Member Since Feb 2015
Location: US
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#11
Ugh, I'm sorry, that's really expensive. And the laughing sounds a bit dismissive. Hope you can find someone else!
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