Couch 215: The Overcoming Couch

Just seems really strange since it's not like you can social distance when getting a manicure. At least in a park, you're not literally sitting face to face with someone for an extended period of time while they do your nails. And of course, if you just got a manicure, you're really unlikely to go wash your hands or douse them in hand sanitizer afterwards. In a park, you won't have some person touching your hands and can generally keep your distance from other people. I still probably wouldn't go to a park, but seems exponentially more likely that nail salons would spread COVID. The beaches in my county never closed AFAIK. I'm sure they're crowded...

Mother problems. Just...

And it’s not helped by knowing it’s probably dementia or short term memory loss or whatever related to age.

She can spend hours a day doing teleradiology in a pandemic, but loses track of an important conversation.

I’m so upset it might even be worth writing Info.

Sorry to hear that ATAT

Watching your parent go through memory loss/dementia/Alzheimer's is painful. It's like you're losing them before you lose them. I saw my dad cry once, when I was 10 at his mother's funeral. With the Alzheimer's, he cried. It broke my heart. I miss my dad so much.

@@, just sayin, the older i get, the less memory and "important" matters. And im not even that old. Its more a matter of i give up-itis - nothing i can do about it anyway, YOU get excited if you want to.

Im sorry, i didnt meant that the way it sounds.

Eta - i didnt think you were criticizing her. I thought you were worried about her. I was hoping to ease your worry by suggesting a little inexactness can be a luxury to a mind that has always been taut.

Had a very mediocre session this morning--I got the sense that T had forgotten something important I'd told him at the end of our last session (he recovered pretty quickly, but still), plus it's hot so I had the window open and the traffic sounds distracted me. Now I feel let down.

He keeps asking me to do a bit of mental gymnastics that I don't really understand (vs it's not actually possible?)... it's something about, like, even in moments of hating myself or feeling ashamed or whatnot, also entertaining the possibility that I might have value, that I might be worthy of love.

Also, vocab peeps, is there a word for someone who is an expert on a particular philosopher's work? Like maybe a devotee, but without the religious connotation?

God, I'm bored. The weather sucks (muggy and hot, but overcast and threatening rain) so I can't really do anything outside. They've started doing construction again down the street and it is crazy loud so I can't take a nap. I just want to eat all the junk food and drink all the alcohol. (I know, I know, eating/drinking out of boredom = bad idea, slippery slope.)

Also my roommate is driving me nuts. She just goes on and on about the bedbug problem (the one that she brought home from the filthy laundromat down the street) like it's the worst thing that has ever happened to someone. She asked me to call the landlord and arrange the exterminator because, and I quote, "you're white, they'll listen to you" (she's Asian) -- I think the problem is actually that she is crap at standing up for herself and also just doesn't like the landlord, who is admittedly awkward. And since she doesn't want to be in her bedroom because of the bedbugs, she's set up shop in the kitchen and is doing her "work" there (trying to make progress on her dissertation but really just screwing around on the internet and complaining about how hard it is to work on her dissertation) which means that I can't get anything to eat without running into her, and whenever I run into her she is bored and lonely and desperate to stop trying to make herself do work so she talks my ear off until I physically leave the room.

And my friend who is in the psych hospital is manic and has zero insight but is not manic enough that she's obviously a danger to herself or others and I'm afraid they'll discharge her and I'll have to start worrying about her again.

I know I'm whining. Today just sucks.

I passed my orthopedics exam yesterday with a C grade. One more exam to go- my final will hopefully be my ENT retake in around 10+ days but the dates aren't up yet officially so I'm glad I have a small break.

Booked a hair appointment for three weeks time. Going to dye my dark brown hair blonde.

I actually can't ride a bike so took my first lesson with my friend J. It was fun and scary at the same time as I couldn't get my feet to move at the same time but I did it a bit!

I also sent T a text telling him that I had passed. After I thanked him I also asked about timings for a second session which we had agreed in our last session for either yesterday or today- he saw the message but didn't reply. Seeing as it's already 3.37pm I don't think he will.

In my book talking about something doesn't mean your whining. I also have building works which have been going on for months so honestly can empathize.

Can you watch a movie, maybe do an online puzzle. How is the psychology fellowship program going or was it the interview stage? (Sorry I haven't been around much so might have got it mixed up.)

The bed bugs sound awful. I would tell her you can't chat long or go in whilst wearing headphones until she gets the idea.

How long has your friend been in hospital for?

My mother took my sister out two days before the schools in the UK officially closed themselves. She hasn't gone back since. Her school has sent an email survey asking parents if they would send their child if they were to open on the 15th of june.I also saw an article where South Korea had to also close again after opening them all up.

Thanks, Lemon.

The fellowship interview went fabulously! The interviewer said she'd be shocked if I didn't get offered a spot. I still have to wait a few weeks to hear officially, though, which is agony.

Yeah I've been going in with headphones on but she talks to me anyway. And, like, she's not a bad person (she's just lonely and can be annoying) so I don't want to be rude or properly tell her off. So I just make my excuses and leave quickly.

My friend just went to the hospital on Wednesday. Our mutual friend who is a psychiatrist in training called the police because the sick friend was acting weird and sending her strange texts. I called the sick friend yesterday on the phone and she sounded so disorganized. It's awful.

Ok, but kids can pass it to adults. This is one of the reasons why the flu subsides when school lets out. Not the only reason, but a major factor.

My uni has not decided if we are having on campus classes in the fall or not. Apparently they are developing contingency plans for all foreseeable outcomes - online only, an abrupt switch to online only, a mix of online and on campus, etc. I'm glad they are giving such careful consideration, although I'm anxious not knowing what's going to happen. I don't even know what I want to happen. A big part of me wants to be all online. However, I am aware that not getting out at all has not been good for me. I just stay in bed all day.

T1 canceled our session for this morning because he had a pet emergency. Not sure when we'll reschedule for. Last time he rescheduled, we did it on Saturday which worked out.

So instead I've been cleaning and having my kids do chores. Might try to paint letters again since I'm having horrible luck with that.

I would just add -ian or maybe -ist. Like someone who works on Hegel is a Hegelian scholar or just a Hegelian.

Dr. T today said that my staying home all the time is good for my physical health (in terms of Covid), but not so good for my mental health.

I'm not so sure it's good for my physical health, either. I mean, staying in bed all day is not good. When I have to go on campus, I walk a minimum of two miles to get to and from the parking lot to the buildings where my classes are. I'm not good about being active when I have to be active just for the sake of being active... especially when it's hot.

I'm lucky because I get to come to work, but when I'm off like I will be this weekend, I can definitely feel the effects on my mental and physical health. I try to go for walks in the mornings on Saturday before it gets too hot. And then the rest of the day I'm a slug.

That's a good point--I'm also much more active when I'm leaving the house. The step counts on my Garmin tracker have been pathetic lately. I'm also bad at being active for the sake of being active. Dr. T is trying to get me walking again.