Is it normal...

Mountaindewed · May 30, 2020 at 07:21 PM

To get jealous when my therapist talks about her other clients when she’s meeting with me? Or am I just being silly? Jealously is not an emotion I normally feel. If I feel jealous of someone I usually just look at my own situation to see how I can better myself. But when I met with her a few days ago she mentioned someone else and how he was “younger then I was” and it got me kinda envious. Although based on what she’s said before I don’t think any of her other clients are going through what I’m going currently through. So maybe she does pay more attention to me. But honestly I just don’t get the women sometimes.

Omers · May 30, 2020 at 07:48 PM

My understanding is that your T shouldn’t ever be talking about other clients, after all it is your time about you. I don’t think it is being silly at all.

My T works very hard to not have clients see him with another client... even when we know good and well the person that just walked past came from his office. He takes it to a degree sometimes that I find silly but I am sure could be important to others. But, this is my T so things can get a little nutty... he has mentioned another client as his reference for understanding something I went through. He mentioned doing an intensive with a client through a different program (I did talk to him about being envious of that). There were two other times he has mentioned other clients and I have said something because it had no relevance to our work and he apologized and said it was not right of him to bring them up.

MissUdy · May 30, 2020 at 07:51 PM

Yes, I get jealous just thinking about his other clients sometimes. And anyone that gets to spend time with him I suppose. I can Easily imagine a beautiful Kind clever person sat across from him, being all smart and graceful and using his time and attention really efficiently to heal themselves. Then I get jealous. Not that I’m possessive or anything...

I don’t know if it’s silly but It’s true.

*Beth* · Jun 07, 2020 at 10:45 AM

My therapist never mentions any specific clients, but she will say something like, "I have told all of my clients that..." -and I feel a burning jealousy, yes.

Mountaindewed · Jun 07, 2020 at 10:50 AM

She told me last week that she has 35-40 other clients. I’ve been in and out of a mini crisis all week because of it. I really don’t understand what my problem is. I didn’t feel this way towards my last therapist at all and I had been seeing her for almost 4 years. So it’s not like I’m a typically clingy client.

Lonelyinmyheart · Jun 07, 2020 at 12:12 PM

Absolutely normal. My T never goes into details about other clients, it would be unethical for her to do so, but occasionally she makes a general comment about something that other clients are struggling with too and I feel really jealous and upset. It takes courage but if you trust your T enough it can be helpful to talk about these feelings with her. A lot of people in therapy experience them so it shouldn't come as a surprise to your T.

*Beth* · Jun 07, 2020 at 02:44 PM

Talking with your therapist about jealousy is a really good idea. I am very open with my T, but I've never even thought to mention the jealousy.

ArtleyWilkins · Jun 07, 2020 at 07:57 PM

My therapists really never talked about their other clients, but I was certainly aware they existed - saw them as I came and left their offices. I'm not particularly the type to worry much about other clients though. I was quite aware they had a full calendar of appointments each week.

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Beth catches the flowers Member Since Jul 2019 Location: Downtown Vibes, California Posts: 15,701 (SuperPoster!) 4 23.7k hugs given	Jun 07, 2020 at 10:45 AM #4 My therapist never mentions any specific clients, but she will say something like, "I have told all of my clients that..." -and I feel a burning jealousy, yes. __________________
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Mountaindewed Legendary Wise Elder Member Since Jun 2016 Location: Where the sidewalk ends Posts: 36,113 (SuperPoster!) 7 8,736 hugs given	Jun 07, 2020 at 10:50 AM #5 She told me last week that she has 35-40 other clients. I’ve been in and out of a mini crisis all week because of it. I really don’t understand what my problem is. I didn’t feel this way towards my last therapist at all and I had been seeing her for almost 4 years. So it’s not like I’m a typically clingy client. __________________ Ridin' with Biden
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Beth catches the flowers Member Since Jul 2019 Location: Downtown Vibes, California Posts: 15,701 (SuperPoster!) 4 23.7k hugs given	Jun 07, 2020 at 02:44 PM #7 Talking with your therapist about jealousy is a really good idea. I am very open with my T, but I've never even thought to mention the jealousy. __________________
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ArtleyWilkins Magnate Member Since Oct 2018 Location: USA Posts: 2,787 5 7 hugs given	Jun 07, 2020 at 07:57 PM #8 My therapists really never talked about their other clients, but I was certainly aware they existed - saw them as I came and left their offices. I'm not particularly the type to worry much about other clients though. I was quite aware they had a full calendar of appointments each week.
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