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Grand Poohbah
Member Since Apr 2013
Location: USA
Posts: 1,897
11 1 hugs
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#1
My T and pdoc have permission to talk to each other. They have phones and texted a couple of times. However this last time my T forwarded the text is sent to her. She always says she won’t do anything behind my back but this kind of felt like it. That text was for her not my pdoc. I know I have them permission to talk but I have never had a T send my text right to him. I feel because her policy is to be open and tell me things first she should have first told me she was going to contact him and second that she would be sending my text. How would you feel?
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bpcyclist, downandlonely, LonesomeTonight
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bpcyclist
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catches the flowers
Member Since Jul 2019
Location: Downtown Vibes, California
Posts: 15,701
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#2
I can understand how you would feel a sense of violation of confidentiality. I'm thinking that your T thought it was okay for her to forward your text because you've given permission for your T to communicate with your pdoc. Probably to her, sending the text is just one of several ways to provide information to your pdoc.
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bpcyclist
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bpcyclist
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Mar 2017
Location: Kentucky
Posts: 3,273
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#3
I'm sorry you're having trouble with this. The message may have been important enough, your life is important, to forward it first. My t and pdoc are in the same offices and I'm grateful when one says something to the other that needs to be said, though not always at the time
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bpcyclist
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*Beth*, bpcyclist
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Nov 2010
Location: Crimson cattery
Posts: 3,512
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#4
I have given T and Pdoc full permission to discuss anything (if they were in a clinic setting this would be quite normal). I don’t think they have ever talked but I don’t care if they do.
If their talking brings up so much discomfort for you it makes me wonder if there is a lack of trust in one or both of them. IMO why it is so upsetting that they shared this information might get you farther than focusing on them having shared the information. __________________ There’s been many a crooked path that has landed me here Tired, broken and wearing rags Wild eyed with fear -Blackmoores Night |
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2014
Location: US
Posts: 22,419
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#5
Discussing is one thing, forwarding texts is very different imho. Unless it’s life and death, I’d feel violated
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Crook32
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Grand Poohbah
Member Since Apr 2013
Location: USA
Posts: 1,897
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#6
Quote:
Exactly how I feel. I don’t mind if they talk but forwarding my actual text feels like it broke my trust and now I have to filter what I say to my T. |
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Grand Poohbah
Member Since Apr 2013
Location: USA
Posts: 1,897
11 1 hugs
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#7
Well I am now without a T. I was just going to cancel 2 weeks but she took it as cancelling for good. She says she is going to tell my pdoc that I cancelled therapy because he wanted to know. I have a couple of appts set up for other therapists but I think I may try this no T for awhile. Honestly I never click with this one and I gave it three months so it has almost felt like I didn’t have one anyways.
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*Beth*, downandlonely
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Legendary
Member Since Mar 2018
Location: United States
Posts: 10,760
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#8
I have never really found a T I clicked with. Have you ever tried support groups? There are a lot of virtual ones now on supportgroupscentral.com. I do those now instead of therapy.
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*Beth*
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underdog is here
Member Since Sep 2011
Location: blank
Posts: 34,733
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#9
I would not give anyone permission to talk to anyone else.
__________________ Please NO @ Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others to live as one wishes to live. Oscar Wilde Well Behaved Women Seldom Make History - Laurel Thatcher Ulrich Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional. |
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Jun 2018
Location: Somewhere
Posts: 3,355
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#10
I don't think I'd like it if the therapist forwarded a text I had sent. I have a very different relationship with her than with the psychiatrist. I tend to be on my best behavior with the latter, while my texts to the therapist are often the result of losing self control and reflect that.
__________________ Life is hard. Then you die. Then they throw dirt in your face. -David Gerrold |
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Grand Poohbah
Member Since Apr 2013
Location: USA
Posts: 1,897
11 1 hugs
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#11
Quote:
Exactly. I don’t mind if they talk treatment or meds and stuff but forwarding a text that I sent to her I could not forgive. When I told her I was taking two weeks off she said fine I will take you off my calendar totally. That wasn’t my intention in the moment but now I think it is a good thing. |
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susannahsays
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