bad therapy experiences?

Sexual exploitation and abuse by a therapist

Everything I have done and accomplished in the past two years were because I had my T. I came to him so broken. He delved into every trauma memory and he was the surrogate caretaker I should of had growing up. He was attentive, caring, and I felt cared for. The transference became so painful I tried to ask him for help with it but after I told him things changed. Like a like switch that was on was not shut off and then he stopped taking insurance and started charging $200 an hour. He allowed me to stay on for fraction of that cost and was willing to do pro bono but it was clear he was saving his emotional energy and skill for the real paying customers. I became dead weight to him and he made sessions so un bearable that I would just leave and I did. So ashamed of myself for trusting and becoming so attached. I see his ads now on facebook and he made on on EMDR. I was so triggered when I saw it. I feel like I was abused all over again from the therapy with him. I can not find a therapist to help me process all of this. Therapy for your therapy. That should never happen. This attachment has been forged through 2 long years of talking about some of the most painful experiences and then having him there to be a comfort object in the face of this pain. Therapy should not require more therapy to be okay.

Sorry I am just rambling.

I’m really scared of this happening to me with current T. I’m so sorry that happened to you! It’s awful. I have looked for therapy because of a therapists behaviour too, but as soon as I would say anything bad about my previous Ts, the new T would shut down and assume everything was some kind of trap.

I’ve read many posts here about t’s that terminate and it’s heartbreaking.

I never got that far with any t to build a relationship. I see the t as any other medical professional like a dentist. I could take or leave my dentist.

The ‘cut to the core’ comments spoke to how I was impossibly damaged and unfixable, condemned with no up side to that I can be taught and rehabilitated. I have no idea why a therapist would do that. It is the opposite of the definition THERAPY.

It was me who quit on all of them after a very short time for some to a year for a couple others. I had no feelings of attachment for them.

The woman lied, mocked and humiliated me, and ultimately was unethical.

I don't believe we are unfixable but I think we may be the ones who are going to have to do it - in a group, like this, of some sort, of others who understand and have been through it. Can't do it alone -- whatever "it" is, become myself, and relational, I guess? But people who don't get it don't get it.

I need more than this online group can do, though, and my in person group which had been so good for 6 years has fallen apart! It wasn't a "rehab" group, though, just good support and I didn't talk a lot about the deep stuff.

Feeling pretty hopeless right now. Called the emotional crisis line this morning for the first time in years. Fortunately I got someone who could listen pretty well, didn't get too offput by me. I have no real hope of finding a therapist who can help though I try sometimes in desperation.

PM me if you'd like to try and develop a self help group of some sort.

What do you hope to get out of the therapy/time with him?

I did get to feel the unbearable feeling of being rejected by my last T. So now I feel and know that, maybe, I was emotionally rejected by my mother. Which is unbearable., too, if I'm correct. Accepting the horror.
Where to go from there for relations and relatedness?

Maybe your T has a clue and a plan, in your case?

Therapist using wrong names of my family members, or insisting on certain theories and opinions that I disagreed with (and that were none of her business), like co-sleeping with my child.