What are your relationship with your T like after your therapy has ended?

So I'm currently in training to become a T. I know in the next few years I will be stopping and moving on from my current T. And I will be seeing a training T that holds the kind of qualification required as part of my training requirement.

It's interesting though because I will also be working in this field. And with the world now being so small, it is very possible we will come across each other professionally in the future.

It's weird because she has seen me transformed from a problematic teenager to now a professional workforce. She knows me very well as a person, and it's quite reassuring she said that I will be exceptional at this job. I thank her for helping me to understand my past experiences in a way to help me not to hinder me during this process of clinical training.

I know with confidentiality and things it's not in her business to talk to anyone about me after our therapy has ended, unless I ask her to, as like a reference or something. But she knows so much about me, but I don't know anything about her. I wonder if that will change when we end that professional relationship between us.

I don't see any of my ex Ts or talk to them, they all ended badly. I imagine when you stop therapy with her, if you happen to meet it will be just like meeting anyone else.... probably a bit strange to see them as not a therapist and just a person with all their own issues.

I do wonder if me and my T would get on outside of the therapy room. I know it's not the kind of thing they would tell us.

I'm still in contact with T. I email her once a month. L also updates her periodically. She might be my therapist again one day, but for now she's backup. She said she'll always be my T

I also kept in touch with an ex-T for about 10 years after we ended. With her, I emailed her once a year. She finally stopped responding when she was about to retire, so I let her go.

You have a unique situation and you may want to ask T if you are curious. As even professional T have their own T they may not want to share on a personal level to allow you the opportunity to return in the future if need be. Or, you may be able to relate on a professional level in the future. I would bring it up in session.

I became friends with the first therapist I ever hired a long time ago when I was in my 20s. With these two - nothing. They retired and I doubt they even remember my name.

I’ve had 4-5 Ts three of them were long term Ts but when I stopped seeing them that was that. Mostly cause I moved states but really I wouldn’t want a relationship with them. They are compartmentalized and not part of my day to day life. Out of curiosity I’ve looked up their web sites to see if they still practice as age is a thing. One is part time and one is now head of a dept and one moved into a new office, but I’ve not contacted any of them, what for? They were part of my growth then I moved on.

I've had 3 long-term therapists and have stayed in touch with all of them for decades now. I'd say we're sort of old friends now that just lightly keep in touch. I facebook with all of them now that facebook is a thing. Before that, we emailed or just spoke on the phone occasionally.

We've been able to do that because I had absolutely no expectation of therapy with them. You have to be able to change that dynamic I think because if you still expect them to listen to you like a therapist, that isn't generally a reasonable expectation.

I've seen them all in person a few times over the years. We've had lunch or were at a function together just coincidentally. My last therapist I run into more regularly since we live in the same town and shop in the same places. We generally just greet each other with a quick hug, chat for a few minutes, and move on with our own business.

The first 2 t's I saw (well the first one barely counts because i didn't even make it through the first session before walking out) I never spoke to again after I stopped seeing them. I felt zero connection with either of them. With current t, it's been 9 years now that I've been seeing her... our connection is deep... and our relationship has evolved over time. I don't think we'll ever totally end therapy - what I envision anyway is at some point stopping regular sessions but as long as we're both still alive and kickin' I'm going to want to talk to her from time to time when life event kind of things happen or for tune-ups or what have you. She's always making noises about wanting to still be working when she's 100... but I don't know what she envisions. I suppose I should ask one of these times.

I really kept in touch with one of mine. We had lunch a few times. Were Facebook friends and she commented and liked everything. Then earlier this year she left a kinda creepy message on my phone and I said “nope” and ended it. Not sure if she was hitting on me or what. I know she was into girls and she was kinda strange about it. I didn’t want to deal with her and my transition at the same time.

Then I had a T for a couple months in 2006 and I went back to that clinic in 2019 but to see a different T. My current one. 2006 T still works there but I only saw her for such a short time I’m not sure she’ll remember me. I doubt I’d ever say anything to her anyways. We went through a lot. The only thing I said to current T about 2006 T was “I used to see her when I was 13.”

I keep in contact (mostly text) but also the occasional email with Former T who I saw for 10 years. Mostly I just update her on how she is doing and ask her how she is doing. She has MS. And lately, asking her if she is surviving COVID okay because I worry about her because of her age (65+). Although she is probably in better health than me. Sometimes she replies. Always something encouraging. Or like that she is proud of me. Something like that. I haven't emailed her in a while. I probably will in December or January. Lately, since like June, I've just texted her like once a month.

After a long and successful therapy together we became personal friends. It happened after therapy, it was deeply considered and something I'm very happy about.